


Heroes of the Multiverse

by thepandemicwillend



Series: Splatoon Against the Multiverse [4]
Category: Luigi's Mansion (Video Games), SCP Foundation, Splatoon, Super Mario & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, 新・光神話 パルテナの鏡 | Kid Icarus: Uprising (Video Game)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Agent 24, Biting, F/F, F/M, Family, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Harm to Children, Het and Slash, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Injury, Ink is Blood, Medical, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Non-Sexual, Original Character(s), Post-Canon, Protectiveness, Restaurants, Science Fiction & Fantasy, Shapeshifting, Sports, Supernatural Elements, Team, Team as Family, Teen Romance, Teenagers, Violence, Weapons, lesbian cephalopods
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-12 08:20:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 45,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28507335
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thepandemicwillend/pseuds/thepandemicwillend
Summary: With people and creatures from other dimensions still appearing in Inkopolis and surrounding areas even after the Scarlet King's defeat, the New Squidbeak Splatoon will recruit new allies, reunite with old friends, and contend with foes both new and old.
Relationships: Agent 3/Agent 8 (Splatoon), Agent 4 (Splatoon)/Original Character(s), Whinter Castello/Clementine Lanark
Series: Splatoon Against the Multiverse [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1955647
Kudos: 2





	1. Evil Unmasked part I: The Dog-Faced Giant

The night was not quiet for most of Inkopolis. Inklings and octolings alike wandered the streets to a variety of destinations both recreational and occupational, and the streets were occasionally brightened by the headlights of rushing cars. In an alley between two buildings, a blinding light shone for a few seconds. In its place was what looked like a human, thin and hunched over. A curious inkling, walking back home after visiting a group of his friends, didn’t bother to resist the urge to investigate. “Hello? Is someone in here?” He was immediately taken aback by the creature in front of him. At first glance, it looked like a human. However, closer inspection revealed a mustache, beard, and hair that all blended together like an animal, arms that were twice as long as they should have been, and eyes that gleamed with a cruel, hungry intelligence. “Woah. What are you?” He held his weapon, a rapid-fire splatling. “Cheeroonear.” The man-thing’s voice was deep, yet quiet. Despite its malnourished appearance and hunched posture, the creature that called itself Cheeroonear matched the inkling in height and had a voice that gave it a certain air of intimidation. “Come here so that I may feed, child.” “Uh, yeah. I’m going to pass.” He started to back away, pulling his phone out of his pocket. Cheeroonear proved deceptively fast as it lunged at the inkling, swiping its arm at him horizontally. The inkling’s weapon and phone fell out of his hands as he fell to the ground. Cheeroonear grabbed him by the leg as he scrambled to get up, lifting him into the air while rising to his full 10-foot height. “You are not human, are you child? I admit curiosity at your flavor.” He opened his mouth, exposing sharp animalistic teeth. The inkling turned into his squid form, effortlessly slipping out of the giant’s hand. Cheeroonear was too surprised to react as the inkling grabbed his splatling to turn around and shoot him with a volley of blue ink. “You surprised me, child. But I will feast on your flesh.” The inkling rolled out of the way of Cheeroonear’s grasping hands to pick up his phone. While dialing the number, he ran out of the alley. “Trent! I need you and the other S4s to get over here right now!” “What the… Ethan, I’m trying to get to sleep. Where are you? Trent’s voice was both exhausted and exasperated.” “I’m in the middle of crab avenue fighting a giant! Get over here now!” “What? I- okay, we’ll be right there.” He hung up, his tone much more alert. Ethan barely managed to backflip in time to avoid Cheeroonear’s grasp. He pressed a button on his splatling, firing a massive sphere of plasma at the creature. It was launched into the air, landing in front of a parked car in a driveway. “That hurt. When I devour you, you will be delicious.” Cheeroonear picked up the car, tossing it towards Ethan. He ran out of the way, jumping to avoid the car as it exploded into an inferno. He left the ground, feeling motionless for a few seconds before abruptly meeting the pavement. He got up, staggering as his blue ink-blood dripped onto the road. “Hey! Ethan! We’re coming!” He smiled with relief. “Maddie! Guys, I’m over here!” He ran over to the rest of the S4. “What happened? You said there was a giant?” Sydney asked, looking over to the fire. “How did that fire start blazing?” “It was the giant. He called himself Cheer-something-or-other. Come on, we’ve got to stop him.” They ran past the fire, where Cheeroonear had disappeared. “What the? I-he was right there! Come on guys, you’ve got to believe me!” “Relax Ethan. We believe you.” Trent assured him, putting his hand on Ethan’s shoulder. “I mean, it’s not like you’ve got any reason to lie.” “Yeah, and besides, something had to have started that fire.” Madison acknowledged, gesturing to the blaze. “Speaking of which, we should probably put that out.” She brandished her octoshot while Sydney took out her splattershot pro and Trent his dualies. The team started firing blue ink out of their weapons until the fire disappeared, leaving nothing but charred car parts. “We’ve gotta find that giant before he kills someone.” “Wait.” Trent pulled Ethan back by his shirt collar. “Maybe we should get some backup first.” “Or better yet...” Madison yawned, “Some sleep. No sense fighting if we can’t actually focus.” “Okay. Let’s get some sleep, and then in the morning we’ll get some help hunting down that giant.” Ethan agreed.

“Marcus, can you get the door?” “I got the door last time. It’s your turn.” Kat rolled her eyes, getting up from her breakfast to open the front door. “Oh. Hey, Trent. Madison.” The two octolings entered the house, closing the door behind them. “We need your help. Ethan was attacked by a giant last night, and we’ve gotta track it down before it eats someone.” Trent explained. “Wait a sec, a giant? Are you sure?” Marcus asked. “Yeah, that’s what he told us. It’s not like he’s got any reason to lie to us, plus there was a fire when we got there.” Maddie confirmed. “Y’know what, with all the insanity we had to put up with last year a giant doesn’t really sound so far-fetched.” “Thanks, Mark. Syd and Ethan are getting Lauren right now. Speaking of which, why didn’t you guys answer your phones? We tried calling you before resorting to house visits.” “Oh, yeah, sorry, they were charging all night. We must’ve left the ringers off and then not charged them.” Kat explained, trying to hide her embarrassment. “Well, in any case, let’s get looking for that giant. We agreed that the four of us will look downtown while the others search uptown.” Trent informed them. “Got it.” Marcus grabbed his phone off his charger while Katherine did the same near the microwave so they’d have some way of communicating with the others as the four of them ran out the door.

“Come on Lauren, open up already!” Ethan banged on the front door, calling inside. “You’re a secret agent; you have no business being a late sleeper!” Eventually, the door opened. “Do you idiots have any idea what time it is?” The teenager in the doorway was holding the remnants of a piece of toast covered in butter, with bags under her eyes. “Sorry, we just need your help with something.” “Right. This’d better be important if you feel the need to interrupt my morning routine.” “I was attacked by a giant last night. By the time the rest of the S4 got there, he disappeared.” Ethan explained hurriedly. “Now come on, we’re going to search uptown while the others look downtown.” “I thought we were done dealing with all this supernatural nonsense now that we beat the Scarlet King.” Lauren muttered, stuffing the rest of her breakfast in her mouth. “So did we, but it looks like we were wrong in our assumption.” Sydney barged into the house, pushing Lauren outside. “Arie, arie, I co’een.” She struggled indignantly to pronounce through the slightly burnt bread. “Cah I ah leash gra m phoe s w cah ca fr bckp?” “What?” Ethan looked at her like she’d spouted gibberish, which Lauren realized wasn’t exactly unjustified. She took a few seconds to swallow before clarifying, “Can I at least grab my phone so we can call for backup?” “Oh, yeah, sure.” “Thanks. Don’t wait for me; I’ll catch up.” “Very well then. Just don’t keep us waiting for too long.” Sydney accepted as the agent briefly retreated back inside.

Trent, Madison, Marcus, and Katherine ran through the city streets, focusing their search on a 10-foot old man with the face of a dog. “Come on, how many places are there for a giant to hide?” Marcus complained. “I’ll check my phone. Maybe there’s something about it on the news.” Katherine had her device turned on for scarcely a few seconds before exclaiming, “Here it is! Looks like the last sighting was just an hour ago at oyster bridge.” “That’s just a few miles away from here. If we book it, we should be able to catch up with it before long. Trent, call the others and tell them we’ve got a lead.” Madison suggested. “Got it.” He pulled out his phone while they mobilized to their new destination.

“Look, I’m just saying, we need to figure out how this thing got here. I mean, we fixed the multiverse last month.” Lauren pointed out, running alongside the other two inklings. “I know, but it’s not like the dimensional barrier is something you can just tape together. Maybe this is just a bit of transuniversal leakage.” Sydney suggested, though she didn’t look entirely convinced herself. "Yeah, maybe." "Hold up girls; Trent's calling me. Yeah, man? What is it?" After a few seconds, Ethan continued, "Alright, good. We'll be there as soon as we can." He put the device away, explaining, "There was a sighting at oyster bridge. It's probably not there anymore, but at least it's some kind of lead." The other inklings spoke their agreements, changing direction accordingly.

Oyster bridge overlooked a highway a few blocks away from Inkopolis plaza, with a 50-foot drop onto consistently heavy traffic. By the time a group of three octolings and an inkling made it to the bridge, a significant portion of it was blackened from fire, with mangled car parts strewn about and multiple colors of ink-blood splotched across the pavement. “Okay, something definitely happened here.” Katherine surmised. “How astute.” Marcus walked over to a stain of yellow ink-blood. “There’s something in here. I think it’s-” He reached into the stuff, immediately pulling away from disgust. “Oh gross! I think that’s drool!” “Well, that clinches it.” Trent looked around the bridge, as though Cheeroonear might jump out of the flames. “We’ve gotta find this giant immediately.” “Yeah, no kidding. If there’s drool in those ink puddles, that probably means he’s acquired a taste for inkling flesh. Which means we need to find him.” “Wait, Madison, think about this.” Marcus offered, “Inkopolis is a really big, public city. If this giant guy burned a bridge and ran, that probably means he wants to stay mostly hidden.” “So you’re saying he’ll probably find somewhere to hide out until he comes out to hunt at night.” Katherine finished. “Exactly. Only question is, where exactly is he hiding out?” A trio of inklings arrived on the bridge. “Guys, we got here as fast as possible. Any leads?” Ethan asked, looking at the ruin. “Yeah, bad news and good news.” Marcus started, “the good news is, we figured out he’s gotta be hiding somewhere outside the city. The bad news is, he’s probably killed already.” “Oh. Oh no. This… you’re right. We have to stop this.” Lauren determined. “I barely managed to get away from that thing last night.” Ethan reminded them. “Still, if we can just figure out where it is we could gang up on it.” “Guys, hold up. I think I might have an idea where it is. What place do we know that’s outside Inkopolis, but still close by, and has a ton of places for something to hide?” Lauren looked at the other half dozen, fully expecting them to figure it out themselves. “Wait, that’s it! New IKEA!” Marcus realized. “Wait, you mean the town where the humans from that infinite store lived?” Katherine clarified. “Exactly. The humans all returned to their home dimensions after we beat the Scarlet King, but the actual town is still there.” “Great. Now that we’ve got a theory where this giant is, we can go and stop it. I say we head out right now.” Ethan recommended. The others agreed, running into the direction of New IKEA.

“So, anyone have any theories about that thing we found last christmas?” Marcus asked, unsure what else to talk about while they walked to the ghost town. They had to wear their winter clothing in the freezing January weather, which had their breath appearing as a cool mist every time they opened their mouths. The snow cracked underfoot, leaving a trail of footprints all the way from the edge of Inkopolis, which also had a thin sheet of snow over the streets and roofs. Within the borders of the city, the amount of snow was limited by the amount of machine-generated heat as well as snow plows wandering the streets to ensure the snow didn’t cause any crashes. Once one exited the border of the city, however, they would realize just how severe the snowfall truly was. The stuff was no longer coming down in flurries, but it had already formed an-inch thick sheet on top of the grass. “I’m honestly not sure. I did some research, but I couldn’t find any mention of anything called Majora.” Lauren confessed. “Did anyone else find anything?” “Hey, don’t look at us. Our team is honestly more of an auxiliary for the agency, and besides we’ve got no idea what it means. Of course, if it was written in Taylor’s ink, who knows what the connection could be?” Trent acknowledged. “You’ve got a point there. I’d rather find her sooner than later, given everything she put us through.” Marcus agreed, glancing over at Katherine. “Well, it wasn’t all bad. I mean, lord Blackwood was pretty cool. Still, we should make sure she doesn’t do anything.” Kat argued. “Look, there’s the town. Come on, let’s go!” Lauren pointed forward, as the team of seven entered the abandoned settlement.

New IKEA resembled a normal, albeit small and primitive, town. The buildings were made of wood with leaf carpets, with dozens of houses. The entire town had been abandoned for months, but it was mostly unaltered save for an increase in snow. Walking through the place, it felt like a time capsule of some pre-modern settlement. “I must admit, this place does have its own charmingly rustic sort of charm.” Sydney pointed out, looking around the town. “Yeah, and it’s got plenty of space for a giant to hide.” Lauren added. “True, but since it’s daytime we should be able to see it just fine.” Ethan argued. “Hey, Mark,remember the blood pool?” Katherine asked. “What? Oh, yeah, I remember. Didn’t I drink out of it?” “Wait, you drank from a blood pool?” Trent blanched. “Oh come on, I was curious and it was just a little sip. Besides, we’ve got bigger things to worry about right now.” “Hey, isn’t that Taylor over there?” Ethan pointed a hundred feet away, where a small purple-haired figure was ducking behind a house. “Yeah, I think you’re right.” Marcus sprinted at the figure, turning behind the same structure. “Taylor! What are you doing here?” “What the-? Marcus? Oh great, figures you’d be here. Listen, can you just leave me alone while I continue my work?” “Hardly! You nearly killed me last time! You think I’m just going to let you go, especially after what we found in that cave? And what even is Majora anyway; mind explaining that one?” “What?! You little-” Taylor clenched her fists, looking ready to kill. “Believe me Marcus, there are forces at play here that you can’t hope to fight against. Forces that will allow me to finally take my revenge for this.” She snarled, pointing to her face that was a blackened, burnt mess on one side with oily pus-filled welts and a bloodshot, dried-out eye. She ran in the opposite direction, leaving Marcus to try to pursue her. “Marcus! Get over here; we found it!” He heard Katherine screaming from a few hundred feet away. Hesitating for a few seconds, he decided to find Taylor later.

While Marcus went after Taylor, the rest of the group went after him to help. “Hey, guys, do you hear that?” “What is it, Ethan?” Kat looked at him impatiently. “I hear something; I dunno, some sort of growling.” “Yeah, he’s right.” The entire group heard the growls of a savage, hungry beast, moving towards them. “Oh man, it’s even uglier in the daylight!” Ethan yelled, pulling out his splatling to fire a bast of plasma. Cheeroonear jumped over the bolt, swiping its claws at Ethan. He held up his weapon to block the strike, knocked over onto his back in the process. “Marcus! Get over here; we found it!” Katherine screamed, turning her dualies into daggers to lunge at Cheeroonear. It grabbed her with its long, spindly arm, trying to squeeze the breath out of her. Kat flung her daggers into Cheeroonear’s head, forcing it to release her. “I will feast on your flesh, you strange creature children. You are far more… palatable than the humans I had become accustomed to.” Cheeroonear pulled the daggers out of its forehead, tossing them aside while its skin repaired itself. Black blood dripped between its cruel, intelligent eyes into its mouth with razor-sharp canine teeth. Madison fired a few blasts of plasma out of her splattershot while Sydney tossed a few splatbombs to Cheeroonear’s sides, distracting the giant long enough for Trent to slide under it with his daggers outstretched. He slashed at the giant’s legs before turning around and shifting his daggers back into dualies, shooting a stream of green ink. Cheeroonear turned around, swiping his arm to smack Trent into a wooden wall hard enough to leave the boy dazed on the ground. Lauren fired several shots of plasma at Cheeroonear’s head until it grabbed her by the leg. It lifted her off the ground before she turned into a squid long enough to slip out of its grasp, grabbing onto its neck in humanoid form. Cheeroonear turned its head, biting down into her arm with its razor-sharp teeth digging into her skin. Lauren screamed in Cheeroonear’s ear, causing it to reach to the back of its head and toss her onto the ground. “Lauren! Don’t worry, I, I can fix this!” Katherine tried to assure her fellow agent, holding her arm as trails of yellow ink-blood gushed out of twin puncture wounds on either side. “I hope.” She muttered, as her friend cried in pain. Marcus finally appeared from behind a nearby building, tossing a series of splatbombs at Cheeroonear, yelling, “Get away from them, you freak!” Before jumping to roundhouse-kick it in the face. “Trent! You alright?” “Yeah, yeah I’m fine.” The octoling stood up, grabbing his daggers to charge back into the fight. “What happened to Lauren?” “That thing bit her.” Kat explained absently, focused on wrapping gauze around the arm. “She’s losing a lot of ink, but I can handle this. You go help the others.” "Got it." Marcus ran over, firing plasma from his splatling while Cheeroonear repeatedly slammed Ethan into the ground. The blasts forced Cheeroonear to release the inkling, who bashed it in the stomach with his own splatling. Trent jumped onto the beast's back, stabbing its shoulder with a dagger while shooting its brown, matted fur with a dualie. It grabbed him with both arms, flipping him onto the ground. Madison jumped up to dropkick Cheeroonear in the stomach while Trent stood back up, firing at it again. "Okay, I think that should do it." Katherine looked down at her handiwork; Lauren's arm wrapped in a thin layer of gauze stained with yellow ink-blood. "Thanks, Kat. Alright, let's get back in there." "You sure? I mean, that was a lot of ink you lost. Look, there's a bunch of the stuff on the ground." "Please." Lauren put her good arm on Katherine's shoulder to assure her while standing up. "I'm agent 3. You think getting bitten is going to stop me?" She fired her splattershot on the plasma setting, striking Cheeroonear in the back. It jumped in the air, trying to lunge at Lauren and Katherine before they backflipped out of the way. Katherine jumped onto Cheeroonear's hunched-over back, kicking its face while turning to jump over to where her daggers had been abandoned. While Marcus and Ethan fired blasts of plasma at Cheeroonear, Katherine jumped at the giant, twisting around in midair to slash at it with both daggers at once. "Your fighting me will only make your flesh all the more delicious." “Sorry, but the kitchen’s closed, you carnivorous cannibal.” Lauren tossed a pair of splatbombs at Cheeroonear’s eyes, the explosions of yellow ink temporarily blinding him. Marcus fired a plasma shot at the ground, allowing the blast to lift him into the air so he could dropkick Cheeroonear in the face. Katherine jumped around Cheeroonear, slashing at both its sides with her daggers before turning them back into dualies to shoot the giant while simultaneously rolling out of the way of its flailing arms. “Ethan, get behind him. We’ll hit him with a double-blast.” “Got it, Mark.” Ethan fired a stream of ink, allowing him to swim through it in his squid form until he turned back into a humanoid behind Cheeroonear. “Kat, Trent, distract him!” He instructed vaguely. “Understood!” Trent responded, tossing a few splatbombs so he could jump in and out of the ink puddles in his octopus form. Cheeroonear reached out at the octoling, only for her to dodge out of the way, jumping off of its arm while twisting around to kick the giant in the side of its head. Trent jumped out of his last green ink-puddle at the same time, transitioning back into humanoid form to kick Cheeroonear on the other side of its head. “Now, you two! We gave you an opportunity; take it!” Katherine called over to the two splatling wielders, who both nodded before firing a single blast of white-hot plasma at Cheeroonear. At the last possible second, the giant jumped backwards out of the way. “Get down!” Katherine pushed Trent out of the way of the blast that sent them both sprawling on the ground. “Thanks. Guess we underestimated that guy’s reflexes, huh?” “Yeah, no kidding.” The explosion had left a small crater in the ground that they both jumped over to start shooting at Cheeroonear. Lauren, Sydney, and Madison all started firing plasma at the giant until it ran behind a nearby building. “Come on team, we can’t let it get away again!” Ethan ran in the direction of where the creature had fled, followed by the other half-dozen. “We should really try to figure out how that thing got here. Marcus, did you find anything out from Taylor?” Katherine asked, running alongside him. “No; couldn’t even get an explanation for Majora.” “We can worry about that later. For now, let’s just focus on stopping that monster.” “Agreed.” Cheeroonear lunged out from behind a corner, swinging its 7-foot arms to strike the entire group at once. Scattered on the ground, they quickly got up. “That’s it! No more holding back; let’s give this guy all we’ve got!” Ethan yelled, starting to fire more ink from his splatling. Marcus turned to the other agents. “Guys, let’s give it one final blast. Ethan, Syd, Maddie, Lauren, we’ll start firing plasma. Kat, Trent, throw as many splatbombs as possible.” The others gestured in the affirmative, firing explosives at Cheeroonear faster than it could hope to react. After several seconds, the creature gave one final death cry before it burned up and fell over into a crumpled heap. “Looks like someone bit off more than he could chew.” Ethan remarked, as Katherine’s phone started ringing. “Oh, hold on. Sorry, guys.” She put the device up to her ear, listening to the caller on the other end. Every once in a while, she would pause for another few seconds. “Yeah, Pearl, we’re fine. Just had to deal with a monster. I know killing the Scarlet King should’ve meant this wouldn’t happen anymore; that’s what we’re going to try and figure out. Lauren got a pretty bad bite on her arm, but I managed to wrap it with gauze. Alright, will do. We’ll be back at base in just a few seconds; the captain can examine it over there. Okay, goodbye to you too.” She pocketed the cell phone, informing the others, “They want us back at base. Lauren, you’re getting that arm checked by the captain.” “Yeah, no argument here.” The seven-man team activated their transporters to depart back to base.

Taylor walked to where she’d been hiding out ever since the fiasco at Hy-Brasil, still fuming at her recent encounter. She took off a necklace she’d been concealing under her shirt ever since finding it at New IKEA, untying the knot from around the horn-like structure on the top of the item. She placed the multicolored thing down, a small grin forming on her face. “One down. Five to go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> M


	2. Evil Unmasked part II: The King of Ghosts

In the middle of the night, the seven agents walked the streets. “Alright, we’re almost at our destination. Everyone remember the mission?” Katherine inquired. “Yeah, we’re investigating a freaky mansion that appeared a few hours ago.” Madison replied. “Correct.” “So, what do you think we’ll find in that mansion? Anything like that giant from last week? What’d it call itself?” Marcus asked no one in particular. “I think it called itself Cheeroonear, or something along those lines.” Ethan explained. “As for what we’ll find in that mansion, no clue. For all we know, it could be unlike anything we’ve ever faced.” “Well in that case, we’ll just have to be ready for anything.” Lauren added, looking up. “And be ready fast; we’re here.” A few hundred feet away was a 30-foot mansion with glowing green windows and an angled roof adorned with what looked like giant marble human heads, their faces contorted in what could only be described as unspeakable agony. The group walked down the stone walkway, their footfalls echoing as the ambient noise of the city fell into an asphyxiating silence. After 50 feet, they reached the dark oaken door, with a rust-covered brass knocker hanging out of a solid gold head with a sadistic grin and teeth as sharp as daggers. Engraved in copper on the top of the door was an address, 112 Ocean Avenue. “Well, Marcus? You want to do the honors?” Lauren offered. “What, scared of a door?” He chuckled, reaching out. As soon as he grabbed the knocker, he felt an inherent sense of dread, as though the house itself was pure evil. Marcus hesitated for a moment before letting the brass fall on the door. The sound was exponentially louder than it should have been, causing them to cover their ears as the door silently opened by itself. “Ladies first.” Marcus pushed Lauren inside the mansion, followed by the other 5 agents. “There. Now we’re even.” “Well now, we should probably split up so we can cover more ground.” “Kat, I’ve really gotta show you a horror movie sometime. First rule of exploring a haunted house: never split up, ever. It just doesn’t end well.” “Gonna have to agree with Mark on this one.” Trent added. “If we’re attacked here, I’d rather us all be together so we can fight it easier. And let’s face it guys, something’s going to attack us here sooner or later.” “Fair enough. Let’s get going then.” Katherine accepted, walking forward. “So, what do you guys want to bet this place is crazy haunted?” Lauren remarked. “Oh please, there’s no such thing as ghosts. I mean, sure, alternate dimensions, elder gods, monsters, okay yeah, this place is definitely haunted.” Syd replied. The group walked into the kitchen, where flies covered the remains of rotted food. “Wow. imagine the property value on this place. Beautiful 3-story mansion, ambient lighting, clouds of insects.” Ethan noted, nervously turning to see Marcus staring vacantly at a maggot-infested slab of unidentifiable-meat. “Hey, dude, something wrong?” He didn’t respond, continuing to stare as though in some sort of trance. “Mark? Marcus!” He shook the other boy’s shoulders, causing him to blink several times. “What the…? Ethan? What’re you doing?” “You… I don’t know, you were looking at those bugs.” “Oh. Yeah, that, it’s nothing. Just bad memories involving a mirror.” “Okay.” Ethan accepted despite his confusion. “I don’t think we’re going to get anything out of this place except a lost appetite.” Madison announced. “C’mon, let’s move on.” They walked into the hallway on the side of the kitchen. The floor had a blood red carpet devoid of any stains or imperfections, as though it had recently been maintained. “Okay, now I’m thinking there might be some kind of force or something causing all this. If we can find and neutralize it, we should be able to turn this mansion to normal, or maybe even make it disappear entirely.” Marcus suggested. “And just what evidence do you have to support that theory?” Katherine retorted. “Nothing, except for the fact that no one else has given any better ideas.” Their footfalls were silenced by the carpet so that their breathing was the only thing they could hear. Even the torches on the wall, flickering with yellow and orange flames despite the seemingly abandoned status of the mansion, remained silent. Eventually, Marcus started running down the hall, quickly accelerating into a sprint. “Hey, wait up!” Katherine called, starting to run after him. In front of Marcus, the floor opened apparently on a hinge. Despite his best efforts, he failed to slow down before falling through the floor. “Mark!” The octoling grabbed his hand as he gripped the edge of the hole. “Come on, help me pull you up.” “Tha-” Marcus’s face was covered by a glowing green hand reaching from the darkness. “Oh hell! Guys, help me out here!” Katherine tried to pull Marcus up as more green appendages appeared to pull him down. His hand slipped from the floor, nearly submerging his face in the darkness as Kat continued to grip his outstretched arm. “Guys, what’s taking so long?!” Kat turned around, nearly falling off the ledge as the entities pulled the inkling into the basement. A red hand the size of her entire body grabbed her face, forcing her to pull herself up as a massive glowing cubic spectre rose out of the trapdoor, holding her in front of a face adorned with a wide permanent scowl. The rest of the group was no longer paralyzed by the eldritch properties of the hallway, running at the spirit. Lauren brandished her splattershot, shooting a bolt of plasma. The ghost flew above the shot, diving forward to slap her with the back of its hand. Katherine turned into an octopus to slip out of the thing’s clenched fist, rolling backwards in humanoid form while Lauren landed next to her in front of the S4 members. Ethan pulled out his splatling, firing a larger bolt of plasma. It passed harmlessly through the ghost before it slammed its massive fists on the ground, sending them falling backwards as the entire hallway seemed to ripple from the force of the impact. “We need to fall back, now!” Lauren commanded, hastily gesturing the remaining agents to retreat. The spectre continued to pursue them, bashing its fist on the floors and walls.

Despite his best efforts to maintain his grip on Katherine’s outstretched arm, the eldritch hands successfully dragged Marcus into the basement. He struggled against them, high-pitched cackling filling his ears as the ghosts pinned his arms to his sides and covered his mouth so he struggled for breath. Focusing, he managed to shapeshift into a squid to fall out of the throng. Fully aware of the entities flying down after him, Marcus shifted back to humanoid form to throw a pair of splatbombs down into the depths. Seconds later, they audibly exploded on the floor. Marcus turned back into a squid to fall into the green ink puddle, waiting submerged as the ghosts approached. They floated around him, dispersing after a few minutes. Marcus shifted back to humanoid as soon as they left, covering his mouth to silence his gasps for breath. After a minute of hiding with his back up against the wall, he started wandering around the basement, using the sparsely spaced torches to guide himself. Surrounded by seemingly endless darkness with bugs crawling over himself as well as the brick surfaces of the basement, Marcus found his mind wandering to last year. “No, I have to concentrate. I can’t focus on that dimension.” He muttered to himself, looking around for a staircase back upstairs. After several minutes, he found an old door. Opening it, he coughed on scattered dust and cobwebs while entering the room. From a nearby torch, he was able to see the vague outline of a flashlight. Turning it on, he looked around the small, cramped room. At the back was a statue of a portly humanoid figure with what looked like an oversized mustache, the brim of its cap hanging above a face frozen in a scream with an oversized mustache. On its back was a device that vaguely resembled a red backpack with a nozzle attached to the top. Hesitating, Marcus took the device off the statue and put it on himself, gripping the hose with no clue how to use it. He muttered to himself, “Okay. I can get out of here. Just gotta figure out how this thing works, find the others, and beat… whatever it is that’s causing all this.” He walked back out, the only sound coming from the casual twirling of his new tool. Eventually, his flashlight fell onto a staircase. "Yes, finally! Guys, I'm coming!" A half minute before he reached the stairs, the inkling felt himself pulled back as a spectral pair of massive purple arms grabbed him.

The second the agents entered the kitchen, they started looking around for something to block off the door. "Come on, there's gotta be something we can use here!" Trent yelled, searching desperately before getting backhanded across the room by the red ghost as it burst through the door. "Okay, let me get this straight: we can't touch him, but he can hit us. Anyone got any bright ideas how to beat this guy?" He groaned, hurrying to stand up. The grate above them started to clatter, the agents and ghost all looking up as it clattered onto the floor. A human fell on top of it wearing white gloves, a green shirt, grey overalls, and a green wide-brimmed hat with a green L embroidered in a white circle. “Ow, that smarts.” Looking up, he noticed the ghost and screamed, stumbling backwards. “Hey! I won’t let you hurt these kids!” His hands shook as he brandished a metallic hose attached to a red device on his back holding a container of green liquid. “Who the dongle is this guy?” Lauren wondered out loud. “No clue, but it looks like he’s on our side.” Katherine acknowledged. The ghost floated towards the human, who pressed a button emitting a flash of light that paralyzed it long enough to run behind it. He pressed a button on the hose, causing the ghost’s tail to be sucked into the device like some sort of vacuum. Punching a button caused the bottom of the canister to open, allowing the green substance to fall out. The human slumped over, his eyes closed as if sleeping while the substance transformed into a gelatinous copy of him. The goo-man transformed a part of its body into a replica of the vacuum backpack, grabbing the other one of the crimson entity’s two stubby tails. They both flipped the creature overhead, smashing it onto the floor hard enough to send the teenagers to the ground. it tried to escape their technology, only to be flipped and smashed four more times. The goo copy dissolved, transferring back to its container. The human’s eyes opened, absorbing the massive spectre into the vacuum. “Wowie zowie.” He gasped, squinting at the group. “You’re not exactly human, are you? There’s something about your faces… and what’s with your hair?” “Wait, did anyone else hear him say ‘wowie zowie’? That wasn’t just me, was it?” Lauren noted. “You’re one to talk, ‘what the dongle’.” Katherine muttered, turning to the newcomer. “Thanks for the save. I’m an octoling, so are these two-” She gestured to Trent and Madison, “and these three are inklings.” She gestured to the others. “Wow. What are you doing here?” “You tell us. Your haunted mansion appeared in our dimension, and our friend got dragged into the basement while we were investigating.” Kat responded. “Wait, this is another dimension? Hold on, your friend’s in the basement?” The stranger looked genuinely concerned. “Yeah, he got dragged down by a ghost army.” Ethan explained. “By the way, what’s your name?” “Luigi, at your service. Now come on, let’s get to the roof.” “Uh, Luigi? Didn’t you hear me? Marcus is in the basement. That’s the opposite of the roof, at least in this dimension.” Katherine pointed downwards. “Trust me, the last few times I encountered a haunted mansion, my brother was sealed in a painting on the roof. With his help, we’ll have an easier time finding this ‘Marcus’ kid. Then again, who knows how long he can last down there without a poltergust?” “You mean that thing you used to beat that ghost?” Trent questioned. “Yeah, the latest model: the poltergust G-00. it’s the only way to fight these ghosts.” “In that case, we can’t afford to wait. Mark’s our friend; no way are we leaving him down there with those things.” Lauren motioned to the shattered doorway. “We can split up. Maddie, Trent, you two and Luigi go to the roof and find his brother. The rest of us will go to the basement and look for Marcus.” Luigi stood in front of the hallway, blocking it off. “No way. Didn’t you hear me? Without a poltergust, you won’t be able to fight back against those things and we’ll just have five kids to rescue instead of one.” “I… Alright. We’ll go get your brother, and then we’ll go back downstairs.” She resigned. “Thank you. I promise, we won’t let anything happen to your friend.” He gestured to the door at the other end of the room. “Now come on, I think the fastest way upstairs is through here.”

Marcus’s chest was constricted and his face covered by the hands of the ghost holding him, obstructing his breath. He struggled against the entity’s tightening grip, eventually turning into a squid to escape its embrace. While turning back to humanoid, he accidentally pressed a button on the device that caused it to emit a blinding flash of light. The ghost was paralyzed, giving Marcus an opening to run behind it. “Not bad. Now let’s see what else this hunk of metal can do.” Pressing a lever caused a gust of wind to enter the nozzle, Marcus stumbling backwards before bracing himself against the force of the vacuum. The ghost’s wisp of a tail was dragged into the machine. Realizing it was trying to escape, Marcus dug his heels into the floor, keeping his grasp on the vacuum until the creature was absorbed into the tool. The agent twirled the vacuum to his side, celebrating his new weapon. “And now...” He hurried up the staircase two at a time. It was seemingly endless; only lit by the backpack-vacuum while Marcus felt like he was spending hours getting no closer to the top. Despite his exhaustion and the significant weight of the device, he continued climbing. Eventually, he started crawling upwards on all fours, giving in to fatigue. He lost all sense of time, unable to tell if he’d been climbing for hours or days. He strained his arm, grasping onto a step overhead to drag himself a few inches towards what he hoped was the ground floor. “Can’t...keep...going.” He choked, his mouth dry. He collapsed onto his back with his limbs sprawled out on the endless staircase, infinitely too tired to register the discomfort. “Maybe...quick rest...couldn’t hurt. Others...will be fine.” Laying down, he held the device he’d gotten from the statue all those eons ago like a child holding a stuffed animal. Shivering from the freezing cold of the ostensibly infinite basement, his mind wandered to the thought of a spectre approaching while he slept, or his fellow agents facing an army of ghosts with no way of fighting back. “No. They… won’t… be fine.” Fully aware he had no choice, Marcus struggled to stand upright, using the railing as support. “I… have to… help… no matter what.” He initially struggled to climb the stairs one at a time, eventually regaining enough energy to resume skipping every other step.

“This place didn’t look nearly as big on the outside.” Trent acknowledged, opening a door at the top of a staircase. “Yeah, there’s definitely a lot of magic in here.” Luigi agreed as they took stock of the room they were in. It was a massive library, with seemingly endless rows of bookshelves. “Woah.” Katherine muttered absentmindedly. “This is like the Wanderer’s Library all over again.” “Funny, I don’t remember the Wanderer’s Library having a piano.” Lauren gestured to the instrument in the corner. Glowing blue and purple bars manifested over the door and between the bookshelf and wall before six magenta orbs appeared overhead, diving inside the piano while Lauren rolled out of the way. It opened to let out a predatory roar. “Watch out!” Luigi brandished the poltergust, pressing a button to emit a stream of multicolored light. The piano continued to approach them, its teeth gnashing, as it was gradually covered in a white glow. “We need to slow it down!” “Got it!” Ethan fired a blast of plasma at the piano, causing it to stop its advance while holding its mouth open. “Hey, inside of it-Luigi, that kind of looks like your poltergust!” Kat pointed to the piano’s open maw. “What? Oh, yeah, you’re right. I lost that model while we were investigating this place, and I was using it as a backup. It must’ve been put there by a ghost.” As he finished, the orbs left the piano. Luigi turned on the vacuum, absorbing the entities. “Okay, now that we’ve found the poltergust 5000, we should choose who gets to-” “Dibs!” Katherine leaned inside the lifeless instrument, pulling out a machine that resembled a redder version of the poltergust G-00 with a longer nozzle and no goo canister. “What? I’m the one who saw it.” She placed the weapon on her back. A cloud of purple smoke rose out of the floor, gradually expanding. Luigi started shaking, stuttering in fear. The cloud took shape, manifesting as a massive spherical ghost with a purple gemstone on top of its pasty visage. “So, Luigi, I see you’ve made some new friends. I bet they'd look great as statues.” "sorry, but I think we're a little young to be getting stoned." "Kid, wait!" The octoling failed to heed Luigi's warning, initiating the vacuum function on the poltergust 5000. Despite the wind going from his face towards the device, the ghost showed no reaction. “Come on.” She started punching the poltergust. “Why won’t this thing work?” The ghost laughed, baring its rows of sharpened teeth. “You silly little girl! You think that glorified household appliance is going to stop me? I’m King Boo, master of the undead!” The gemstone on its head started glowing, shooting a beam at Katherine. Luigi dove to push her out of the way, leaving the floor where she’d been standing gray and hardened. “Thanks. I take it you’ve fought this psycho before.” “That’s an understatement. I’ve had to save my brother from him multiple times. Of course, it’s usually a painting, not a statue.” King Boo fired his petrification beam again, forcing the two to split up to dodge it. “Guess we’ll have to get past this guy first.” Lauren fired her splattershot, the plasma phasing through its translucent form. “You must be even dumber than you look if you think you can hurt me with a mortal weapon. Quite the accomplishment, if you ask me.” “I didn’t.” She retorted, backflipping out of the way of another magic blast before kicking off a bookshelf. Nearby, a section of the floor was pushed open by a teenager who immediately collapsed. “If I never… see another staircase… again… It’ll be too soon.” “Marcus!” Katherine ran over to help him stand. “Thanks. Quick question: who’re those two?” He pointed at Luigi as he jumped, propelled by the blast from Trent’s splatbomb onto King Boo’s crown. “The green guy’s been helping us find you, and the big circle’s trying to turn us to stone.” She explained while King Boo shook Luigi off, tossing him next to them. “I take it you’re Marcus?” Before he could answer, Luigi grabbed him by the shoulders. “Where’d you get Mario’s poltergust 3000?!” “Wait, who? I got this off a statue; I don’t know any Mario!” He blurted out. “A statue? But if you were in the basement...” Before Luigi could finish the thought, the three jumped away from another blast. “I assumed my brother Mario would’ve been on the roof like the last three times, but I guess King Boo wants to mix things up.” Luigi explained hurriedly. “Makes sense.” Marcus agreed. “He probably wanted you to go the wrong way the whole time.” “Little help here, team!” Lauren turned into a squid, swimming through an ink trail she’d set up to dodge another beam from the crown. “Woah! Your friend just turned into a blooper!” “A blooper? Is that what they call squids in your dimension?” Marcus asked. “I… nevermind that. We need a plan. Boy, you’ve already been down there, so the two of us will go back to get Mario. Katherine, stay up here and help them. Here-” He took off the poltergust G-00. “King Boo’s no joke; you’ll need the latest model. The only reason I’m bringing your boyfriend with me is so he can show me where Mario is.” “Understood.” The octoling traded the poltergust models. “But we’re honestly more like adopted siblings.” An explosion interrupted them as the S4 members threw splatbombs at the petrification crystal. “Forget that! Kat, get in there. We’ll be back as soon as we can.” Marcus assured her. “Don’t need to tell me twice.” She charged into the fray, brandishing the advanced weapon while Luigi called after her, “If you press the button on the back, you can transfer your consciousness between Gooigi!” before leading Marcus back down the stairwell. “Wait, it felt like years getting up here. How can we be sure we’ll get back in time?” “I can just use the dark-light device to disable the king’s magic, that’s how.” He turned on the machine, maintaining a trail of multicolored light until they reached the bottom. “You’re right, that was way quicker. C’mon, I think he was this way.” The two entered the side room where the statue remained. Looking around, Marcus noticed a knife display on a nearby wall. “Gotta admit, these knives actually look kinda cool-whoa!” “What is it? Did you hurt yourself?” Luigi asked. “No, there’s purple ink here. I think it might be from Taylor, my crazy ex-girlfriend.” “meaning...?” “No clue, but whatever it is can’t be good. Still, if we missed her, we should focus on getting your brother back to normal.” “Don’t have to tell me twice.” He activated the dark-light device, pointing it at his petrified brother. “Uh, is something supposed to be happening?” “What?” Luigi punched the device while the statue continued to show no reaction. “Of course; this is an outdated model. We need to take him upstairs and use the G-00 version.” “Got it.” They picked up the statue, dragging it back upstairs.

While the S4 and Lauren continued to dodge King Boo’s attacks, Katherine used the poltergust G-00 to go on the offensive by repeatedly blinding him with flashes of light. Every time, he recovered almost immediately, giving her no opening to attack. “You’re a child! What makes you think you can take on the master of ghosts?” The king focused his attacks on Kat, forcing her to continuously dodge-roll. She dove between two bookshelves to catch her breath. “Okay, what’d Luigi say?” She looked the poltergust over, trying to remember his instructions until finding a button on the side of the main body. She punched it, immediately feeling herself lose consciousness. A second later, she looked down to see a slender body made of a green viscous substance. Next to her was a purple-haired octoling, slumped over in an unnatural sleep. Kat tried to remark on the peculiarity of seeing herself from the outside, though Gooigi lacked the ability to speak. Charging back into the fight, Gooigi rolled out of the way of another petrification beam while transforming a part of its body into a replica of the poltergust G-00 to blind King Boo with the flashlight. “Kat, you focus on attacking King Boo with that polter-thing. The rest of us will try and break his crystal.” Sydney recommended, the goo-creature nodding in affirmation. Trent jumped, kicking off a bookshelf to escape one of King Boo’s petrifying attacks while tossing his daggers into the gemstone. “You know what? I’m feeling kind of lonely. I could use some friends!” A small army of thin green spectres, red cubic ghosts, and purple entities with oversized arms appeared to surround the agents. “Oh great! Because one of these guys just wasn’t enough!” Lauren yelled, backflipping out of the way of a red spirit’s punch into the grasp of a purple. “Oi! Get off of me, you perverted poltergeist!” She transformed to slip out of its arms, kicking through its translucent form while Gooigi used its vacuum to repeatedly slam the creature into the ground before sucking it into the device’s replica. “Thanks, Kat.” The gelatinous creature nodded, both of them pushed to the ground away from a petrification blast. “Focus!” Ethan stood up, helping the two to their feet. “We need to pay attention! Come on!” Madison instructed. “Sorry; you’re right. Let’s go!” They ran back into the fight, Ethan wiping the goo on his shirt. The floor opened, Marcus and Luigi carrying a statue. “You were right. That only took five minutes instead of five years.” Gooigi looked at them before disappearing, Kat running from behind a bookshelf. “Guys, we could use some help here! Luigi, want your poltergust back?” “Yeah; just toss it over!” They both threw their poltergusts, easily catching them while the group of eight rendezvoused. “So, you found your precious brother. I hope you’re all ready to join him.” “I won’t let you hurt my brother, King Boo, or my new friends.” Despite Luigi’s shaking, he held the poltergust G-00, ready for battle. “Charge!” Lauren yelled, the squadron running forward. “Marcus, Katherine, we all need to hit him with the lights at once. That should stun him.” The three poltergust wielders ran directly at King Boo, dodging his blasts while the others distracted the ghost army. “3...” Katherine started. Marcus continued, “2...” “1!” Luigi finished, as King Boo was blinded by three flashes of light. “OW! My eyes! Do you have any idea how much that smarts?” “That’s not exactly a word I’d associate with you.” Marcus noted as they turned on their vacuums, simultaneously pulling on King Boo’s ghost tail. Luigi transferred his consciousness to Gooigi, adding to their strength. The four of them all turned their poltergusts upwards, using every ounce of their strength to flip the ghost-king overhead. “No! This is impossible! How could I be defeated by a plumber and some children?!” He screamed, smashed into the ground hard enough to force him to disappear. He left his crystal behind, exploding into thousands of harmless shards. “I guess he just didn’t have the spirit to pull it off.” Luigi surmised, having transferred his mind back to himself. “And now there’s just one thing left to do.” He turned the poltergust G-00’s dark-light device onto Mario, only for the same result as last time. “No, that’s impossible.” “Maybe that’s not the real Mario. Maybe it’s just a decoy statue.” Katherine suggested. The entire mansion shook to its foundations, bookshelves falling apart around them while the ghosts fled, having stopped fighting as soon as their king was defeated. “He’d better not be! This place is about to collapse!” Marcus yelled, looking around. “This statue is my brother; I know it! We need to get out of here!” “We can teleport back to base. Here.” Kat tossed something over to Luigi. “A transporter. Marcus, show him the code.” “Got it. Everyone ready for teleportation?” The others nodded, Marcus helping Luigi activate the device to disappear from the collapsing mansion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a


	3. Evil Unmasked part III: the Man With Eyes on His Feet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Today, I'll be trying to get a capture card for my switch so I can livestream the Mario splatfest. I only just thought of the idea, which is why it's unfortunately so late. However, it's still very possible that something will go wrong, so keep that in mind. Still, if everything goes according to plan, I should be able to show you guys my performance on the final day on behalf of team star. I'll also be happy to answer any questions you might have about Heroes Of The Multiverse, so long as they aren't too spoilery. once again, it's entirely possible I won't get the card and this whole thing will be a pipe dream, but I'm feeling cautiously optimistic. I'll post the livestream link here sometime tomorrow, so keep an eye out. The schedule is flexible, after all. If you have any questions, feel free to comment.
> 
> Please comment; I'm so lonely

“I’m sorry, but I have no idea how to fix this.” Marina looked over the statue for the hundredth time that week. “Luigi, you sure this is your brother?” “Positive. We have a connection, like we can tell where we are or when one of us is in danger.” “Must be a brother thing.” Sheldon remarked. “As for me, I’m an engineer. If this is magic, then we might need magic to reverse it.” “Maybe. But if the dark-light device didn’t work, then we might need a newer model. But the only guy who knows how to make one is in my dimension.” “That might not be as big a problem as you think.” Marina assured. “If you give us your poltergust, we might be able to trace the dimensional signature and contact its creator.” “Okay, I think that might work.” Luigi accepted, handing it over. “Fascinating. This is a truly sophisticated device.” Sheldon examined the tool. “Now, you said its primary function is combating ghosts?” “Yeah, it sucks them up. I don’t understand how it works, though.” “Well, that’s fine. I don’t know how long this’ll take, but it shouldn’t be too long.” Marina explained. “Oh, I guess that’s fine.” Luigi hung his head dejectedly. “Hey, don’t worry.” She put her hand on his shoulder. “The kids told us how you helped them at the mansion; this is the least we can do. Besides, I’ve got some new equipment in the lab I’ve been meaning to try out.”

Marcus shook Katherine in her bed. “Hey, wake up already.” He called, shaking her shoulders until she opened her eyes. “Marcus. What’re you doing?” “Come on Kat, you know what today is.” “Wah… Oh!” She bolted up from the bed, shaking herself awake. “Thanks bro. I’ll call the others to make sure they’re up.” “Cool. So I guess you’re ready to become an official citizen then?” “Yeah, no kidding.” Katherine started making herself breakfast in the oven while Marcus put something on the stove for himself. “Y’know, I’ll be trying to get a job while you’re out.” “Really? I guess we’re both taking initiative today.” She mused. “So, where are you thinking of working?” “I’ve been thinking of working at the crust bucket. Sean got a new assistant, but she’s night shift only.” “Well, good luck.”

Later, three octolings entered the government building in the middle of Inkopolis. “You two ready for citizenship?” Trent grinned from excitement. “Yeah, about time they got this set up.” Madison replied. “Well, we didn’t become public knowledge until after I moved here. With so many here, it makes sense it’d take a while to get it sorted out.” Kat acknowledged, as they advanced to the front of the line. “All electronics and metal possessions in the bucket, please.” An inkling held out a metallic bucket full of phones and jewelry. They obeyed, moving into the main office with the next group.

Three inklings walked down the street with nothing better to do at the time. “Lauren, we’re all thinking it, so I’m gonna ask: Why don’t you have a job? The S4 are good enough to make a living off turf wars, but what’s your excuse?” Ethan prodded. “I make enough from turf wars to get by. Plus, I figure if I had to balance an agent life with a job, I wouldn’t have time for myself.” “Fair.” A flash of light appeared in the middle of the street, followed by a 10-foot humanoid with small indents where its eyes should’ve been. Several cars swerved to avoid it, crashing into each other. “Oh great. We need to help! Now!” Ethan ran over to a car, forcing the driver’s side door open. “Get up!” He slapped the unconscious driver awake before hastily helping him take off the seatbelt, pulling him out of the vehicle. “Get out of here, now!” He nodded his thanks, running behind a corner. “You two help the civilians. I’ll fight.” Lauren took out her splattershot, jumping off a car roof to springboard into a somersault. At the zenith of her jump, she straightened out to fire bolts of plasma at the giant. It stumbled backwards, struck point-blank in the chest. She landed with both feet on the ground. Before following up, it stepped forward on one leg, kicking with the other. Glimpsing an eye in the sole, Lauren flew backwards until colliding with an empty car. Shaking glass off her head, she stood as the giant entered a handstand too fast for its bulk. It bent its legs, turning its feet towards her with eyes in the soles. “I am Aigamuchab. You will not stop me.” “Let’s go.” She ran at the giant, firing yellow ink. It flipped forward, placing its eyes on the ground while the ink passed under. The giant swiped its leg towards Lauren, turning into a squid to submerge in the ink. Losing balance, Aigamuchab resumed its handstand. Glimpsing a ripple in the ink trail, it grinned. “You cannot hide. nothing hides from me.” It walked on hands towards the source of the ripples faster than the inkling could react. It pulled her out, gripping her hard enough to force her into humanoid form. It flung her through the air onto the roof of a nearby car, hastily rolling into an alley while trying not to vomit.

Marcus walked up to a food truck, nervously excited. “Hey kiddo. What’re you in the mood for?” The owner, a fried prawn, gestured at the menu overhead. “I need a job.” “Oh, is that it? I suppose I could use a day shift assistant. Let me grab the paperwork.” “Alright.” Marcus nodded appreciatively, agreeing to wait. While Sean was at the back of the truck, Marcus’s phone started ringing. He considered whether to answer it, eventually reaching into his pocket before Sean came up. “I hope you’re not planning on having your phone at work.” He placed it on the windowsill. “Of course not. Thanks, sir.” “No worries, kiddo. Good luck.” Marcus nodded, running to the nearest table.

“Come on Mark, pick up already!” Lauren panicked into the phone. A car flew at her, forcing her to run out of the way of the vehicle as it exploded behind her. “Gah.” She stood up, the aigamuchab jumping over the flames to land on its hands while its feet blinked at her. “For too long, civilization has encroached on my territory. I cannot ignore it. You must be eradicated.” It flipped forward, swiping its arm at her. She stepped back, caught off guard by an uppercut to the stomach that sent her sprawling. “How did you…?” She breathed, the wind knocked out. “You cannot hide.” Aigamuchab tried to crush Lauren underfoot, holding up her hands to keep it off her as it gradually descended on her. “Smells like the metro.” She turned her face, arms bending at an uncomfortable angle as they were forced down. “I will see the light leave your eyes as I crush the life out of you.” Lauren looked around, seeing a shard of glass. Desperate, she plunged it into Aigamuchab's eye, spraying black blood on her face and shirt. Aigamuchab roared in pain. Lauren ran behind it, jumping on its back with a splatbomb so the explosion launched her into the air. She grabbed a fire escape railing, ignoring the burning pain in her arms to climb onto the grated metal. Looking down, she saw Ethan, Sydney, and a few others running between the crashed cars, putting out fires and helping civilians who’d fallen unconscious. Lauren fired a trail of ink to the top of the wall, swimming up in squid form until reaching the roof and pulling out her phone again. “Kat, please answer me. I need help. Come on Kat, pick up! We need backup!” She remembered, “Right. The citizenship thing; she doesn’t have her phone. Oh sh-”

“It’s true. My friends and I went to Innsmouth county last year and fought an evil organization from another dimension to stop them from taking over the town.” Trent explained to the inkling sitting across from him at the small table in the middle of a soundproof cubicle. “Very well. Do you have proof of this?” “Yeah, I’ve got some friends there. Well, more like friends of my friend’s friend, but they’ll back me up.” “Alright.” He picked up the phone hanging on the wall. “Do you remember the number?”

“Here; I finished it.” Marcus handed the paper to Sean. “Thanks. I’ll let you know if you’re hired in a week, but in the meantime I can’t really promise someone else won’t take the position.” “Understood.” Marcus sat at the table, pulling his phone out to listen to a single missed call. “Marcus, I’m downtown with Ethan and Sydney. We’re being attacked by a monster, a lot of civilians are hurt, I can’t beat this thing... We need backup, now! Marcus, answer me! Come on, I know you have your phone! I need help! Come on Mark, pick up already!” Marcus pocketed his phone, hastily standing up. “Hey, uh, Sean, how long would it take to walk downtown and back?” “Just a few minutes, but I wouldn’t risk it. I’d wait until night, since after that you should be home free.” “Okay then.” Sean looked closer at Marcus, noting his panic. “Something wrong?” “Yeah, I’ve got some friends downtown who need my help.” “Really? Can’t they wait?” “No!” Marcus yelled, remembering how alarmed Lauren had sounded. Sean’s expression hardened uncharacteristically. “I hope you don’t plan on having that attitude at work.” “I’m sorry, but my friend Lauren needs my help. I don’t think she can wait much longer.” “Wait. Laker? You’re friend’s agent 3?” “Yeah. I know we didn’t tell our names when we went public, but I’m agent 4. Here-” He replayed the message for Sean to hear. “Okay. Go help her. But I can’t give special treatment to any employees, especially if they’re still unhired. If you’re not back before someone else takes the job, then you’re out of luck.” Marcus weighed his options before making his decision.

“How many times have you had to rescue your brother, Luigi?” Marina asked, analyzing the poltergust. “I think 4 times. 3 with King Boo, and once in antarctica. We don’t talk about that one, though.” “Well, I’m definitely finding some signs of life here.” Sheldon informed them, examining the statue. “Yes! I told you it was him!” Luigi celebrated. “How close are you?” Marina analyzed the information she’d gathered, the horseshoe crab using a stool to examine it as well. “Good news.” He started, “We’re almost done.” The octoling pulled out a small circular device, hooking wires between it and the poltergust while looking at the computer notes. “It’s actually working!” Sheldon called, pressing a button on the device. The middle was filled with a blue glow, projecting a conical hologram into the air. “Hey, professor! We did it!” Luigi looked up at the man with an oversized head and single wisp of hair. “What- Luigi? What-” He saw Sheldon and Marina. “Okay.” He took a sip of some greenish coffee. “I suppose an explanation is in order.”

Aigamuchab jumped onto the fire escape, bringing it to a deafening crash. Lauren backed up as Aigamuchab blindly grasped onto the rim, bringing itself up. “I’m not afraid of you!” She screamed, firing plasma into its face. Aigamuchab pushed itself onto the roof, taking advantage of Lauren’s surprise to swipe its arm at her. She ducked backwards, dodging the strike before jumping at Aigamuchab to land a few kicks on it. The giant grabbed her legs, turning to the side and slamming her into the brick roof. Lauren struggled to stand up, her yellow ink-blood staining the roof. Aigamuchab flipped forward, facing its eyes toward her. One was still dripping black blood, while the other blinked at her. “You know you can’t defeat me, child. Why continue your futile attempts? It would be smarter to simply turn your weapon on yourself.” “Sorry, buddy.” Lauren staggered forward, her limbs dripping ink-blood. “You’re not getting rid of me that easy.” Aigamuchab launched itself at her, kicking her to the edge of the roof. Before she could get up, an eye briefly appeared above Lauren until Aigamuchab dragged her off the building. She bit down on its hand, grabbing the giant’s arm to use its own momentum to drag it into the twenty-foot drop. Within a few seconds, Lauren’s fall was abruptly broken by her back colliding with a car and sliding down to the pavement. Blinking through the pain, she looked up to see Aigamuchab falling toward her, teeth bared and fists outstretched. A second before it could land on top of her, the creature was knocked aside by a deafening explosion. Lauren looked a few feet away, where Marcus and Ethan were standing with their splatlings. Someone vaulted over the car she’d fallen next to, grabbing the bloodied agent by the underarms to help her stand up. “Thanks, Syd.” She gasped out as the other two inklings ran up to them. “Bout time you showed up, Marcus.” “Sorry; I just got a job offer, and I wasn’t sure if I could get here and back in time.” “What?! I nearly got killed, and you took this long to get here because of a job?!” Lauren snarled, her face contorting in anger. “Look, I know it was wrong, and you have every right to be mad at me, but I really need some way to get paid. I swear, I’ll make sure to prioritize the agency over work, no matter what.” Lauren thought for a few seconds, calming herself down enough to stop shaking with rage. At the end of the street, Aigamuchab got up, roaring in anger before turning the corner. “Okay. We have bigger problems right now anyway. Now, what’s the plan, agent 4?” “I-right. Syd, you take Lauren to the base for medical treatment-again-while me and Ethan deal with the monster. I’ll set up a teleport beacon here so that as soon as you’re done, you can come back and help any remaining civilians. Then, I want you to come back us up against that thing. Knowing our track record, it should be as simple as following the trail of destruction.” “Good plan.” Lauren grinned, baring her chipped, bloodied teeth. “I mean, I’m tenacious, not suicidal. Besides, that Aiga-aimu-aigachab-that guy-doesn’t stand a chance against you threah-ah-ah-aah, stupid injured everything; ruining the moment.” “Don’t worry, I’ll be back soon. You two destroy that dishonorable giant.” Sydney entered the codes on her and Lauren’s wrist-mounted transporters to teleport them both to the group’s base while the other half of the group started running in pursuit of Aigamuchab.

“Hey, Eric, do you remember last month?” “No, Katherine. I completely forgot about how we fought an evil organization from another dimension that mind-controlled your friend, and then teleported dozens of miles in the time it takes to microwave a pop-tart to help fight an infinite horde of demons serving an elder god that nearly destroyed the multiverse. It completely slipped my mind.” “See?” Katherine turned to face the inkling interviewing her. “Now if that’s not sarcasm, then I don’t know what is. Now do you believe me?” “Well, you passed the lie detector test and your story matches with recent news reports. I just want to ask you a few more questions.”

“I’m sorry, Luigi, but I just don’t have any way to bring Mario back.” E. Gadd explained, his projection device connected to multiple analytical devices. “Based on my analysis, there’s some very powerful dark magic at work here. It’s different from anything I’ve seen at Evershade Valley or the Last Resort, almost as if it’s partially disconnected from King Boo.” “So, you’re saying that some entity other than this King Boo guy added their magic to his?” Marina clarified. “Correct, weird octopus lady. Unfortunately, without any frame of reference for this new magic, I can’t create an antidote. Luigi, did you find anything strange in that mansion? Stranger than usual, I mean.” “Well, that Marcus kid mentioned that he saw some ink from a girl named Taylor. Apparently she’s his ex-girlfriend.” “Hold on. Taylor? That psycho?” Marina looked between Luigi and E. Gadd. “He mentioned a couple weeks ago he encountered her in New IKEA while searching for a monster. She ranted about some sort of power that would allow her to take revenge. Maybe they’re connected.” Her thought process was interrupted by frantic knocking at the lab door. “I’ll get it.” Luigi opened the door, two inklings walking in the lab with one covered in yellow ink-blood and the other supporting her on her shoulder. “Mama-mia! What happened to you two?” “Aig-chad-aimub-” “We were attacked by a giant with eyes on its feet.” Sydney explained while Lauren kept trying to pronounce Aigamuchab’s name. “Really? I’m sorry you got hurt, honestly.” “Wait, you believe her? Just like that?” Lauren asked, looking up. “Believe me, when you’ve been through as many adventures as Mario and I, you learn to stop questioning things.” “Now that I can relate to.” Marina added, taking Lauren off of the S4 member’s shoulders. “I’ll take her to the infirmary. Sheldon, Luigi, you guys keep comparing notes with the professor.” “Thanks, guys. Syd, get back to the others now and back them up against that thing.” “Got it.” She teleported out of the base while Marina helped the younger girl into the general area of her house that they were using as a base, leaving Luigi and Sheldon alone with the holographic image of professor E. Gadd. “So...” Luigi started nervously. “You guys got anything to eat around here?”

After a few hours of being interviewed, the three octolings left the local government building, each holding an ID card. “This is amazing!” Madison hollered, emphatically sniffing her card. “The sweet smell of bureaucracy.” “Yeah, no kidding. Something about actually being an official citizen, I don’t know, it’s just great.” Katherine checked the notifications on her phone, opening a voicemail. “Kat… Kat, please. Please answer me. I need help. Come on Kat, pick up! I’m overwhelmed here; we need backup!” Kat’s ink-blood ran cold from how uncharacteristically exhausted and scared Lauren sounded over the phone. “Oh no. No, no, guys, we have to help her, now!” “Yeah, no argument here. Come on, let’s go.” Trent pulled out his phone as they started sprinting down the sidewalk. “Hey, Ethan, Kat just got a distress call from Lauren and she’s not picking up. Do you have any idea where she is?” “Yeah, don’t worry.” He was breathing heavily as he ran. “She got pretty banged up, but Syd got her to the infirmary. We’re trying to find the monster she was fighting; some kind of giant with eyes on its feet. We think it’s heading to the Shellendorf Institute.” “Alright, we’ll be there.” Trent hung up, explaining, “Lauren’s at the infirmary, and Ethan’s fighting a monster at the Shellendorf Institute.” “Alright, c’mon!” Syd gestured in the direction of the history museum.

The Shellendorf Institute was less crowded than usual, being a weekday, when a young girl walked through its halls. Her burnt face, hideously and viscerally scarred on one side, caused the relatively few other patrons to instinctively back away from her. The inkling grinned, having grown accustomed to the reaction. She carefully examined each exhibit, looking for one artifact in particular. There was a crash at the front of the museum as a massive creature burst through the wall, flipping forward to swivel the eyes on its feet around the room. “Come on, we need to kill that thing!” Marcus yelled, him and Ethan firing plasma from their splatlings. Aigamuchab jumped over the shots, letting them destroy the front desk while the patrons and employees tried to evacuate the building in their panic. “I will raze your civilization. You have encroached too long on my ancient territory. I am older than your species by far, and I will not allow you to overtake my territory any more than you already have.” “Sorry, but we can’t just let you kill everyone.” Ethan fired a trail of blue ink from his splatling, swimming through it in squid form while Marcus swam through his own green trail. Sensing their vibrations on the floor, Aigamuchab grabbed at them through the viscous liquid. The two inklings jumped out, shifting into humanoid form to kick Aigamuchab in the back. It jumped forward, bending its knees backwards to level its eyes with the agents before kicking them both 20 feet away. “Okay, I’ll admit. This guy’s tough.” Marcus groaned, both of them standing back up. Aigamuchab somersaulted to raise its eyes at the 2nd-floor railing, jumping at Marcus and Ethan. They managed to dodge its kick, followed up by swiping at them with its arm. Knocked back in two separate directions, Aigamuchab dropkicked Marcus while he was still moving to accelerate his collision with the concrete wall. “So, this is what I get for showing up late, huh? Noted.” He groaned in pain, trying harder to stand up. He hastily turned to squid form, shrinking under Aigamuchab’s arm as it collided with the wall where his face had been hard enough to crack it. Aigamuchab lurched forward from an explosion on its back, allowing Mark to place his palms on the wall for leverage to kick at Aigamuchab with both legs. The giant grabbed his limbs in mid-kick, turning around to throw him into the middle of the room. Marcus threw down a splatbomb while he was falling, breaking the front of a plexiglas display case while creating a puddle of ink for his squid form to submerge in. He pressed a button on his splatling so it folded in on itself, allowing him to take one of the swords from their exhibit while the museum's alarm system went off. The giant lifted its leg to look at the sword, jumping onto the stairs to the second floor. “Hey! Get back here, you coward! C’mon, Ethan, we’ve got a monster to slay!” “Alright, let’s do this!” The other splatling user folded his weapon, grabbing the other sword off the display shelf while the two inklings ran up the stairs after Aigamuchab. The burnt-faced girl swung her inkbrush at the creature, knocking it back an inch while covering its front torso in purple ink. The giant grabbed the handle of the brush, using Taylor’s momentum to toss her into the temnodontosaurus skeleton hanging from the ceiling. The 20-foot long aquatic reptile hung 50 feet above the museum floor, suspended by multiple cables below the 2nd floor railing. Taylor grabbed onto one of the rib bones while the broken inkbrush fell to the floor, looking up to see the giant fighting two sword-wielding inklings. Another inkling entered the museum’s front door, closely followed by a group of three octolings. Taylor lifted herself inside the ribcage to hide while the newcomers searched the museum. “Up there!” Sydney called, pointing to the 2-on-1 sword fight. Aigamuchab backflipped into a handstand, pointing its eyes to the two amateur swordsmen before flipping forward to kick at them. They both jumped backwards, Mark following up by jumping forward to slice at Aigamuchab’s face while Ethan rolled under it. Aigamuchab kicked out behind itself, sending Ethan sprawling and his sword clattering onto the massive skull of the creature hanging beneath them, while a line of black blood covered its forehead across one of its eye indents. It swiped its arm in front, knocking Marcus onto the stairs. While he got up, two daggers embedded themselves into Aigamuchab’s stomach. “What the…?” “Relax.” Katherine helped him up, dragging him back to the second floor while Trent jumped at Aigamuchab. He grabbed his daggers, kicking off the giant while pulling them out. Ethan rolled under Aigamuchab, both of them rendezvousing with the other four. Katherine tossed a splatbomb at Aigamuchab, sending it staggering backwards as Marcus noticed something in his peripheral. “Oh great, not here.” He muttered, turning to the others. “You guys take care of the giant. I just spotted Taylor.” “Wha- alright, we can handle this freak.” Trent agreed as the five-man group charged at Aigamuchab. Marcus jumped off the railing, the skeleton shaking slightly from the sudden additional weight. “Gotta admit, I was waiting for you to show up.” Taylor picked up the sword Ethan had dropped, Marcus blocking her slash. “It’s funny you’re here. Any particular reason?” While they fought, Trent fired his dualies at Aigamuchab. Katherine slid under it, slicing her daggers at its legs. Aigamuchab fell to its hands and knees, allowing the octoling to toss her dagger into its remaining eye. “No! I must end your species! I won’t allow it to end this way!” “Sorry, but we can’t let that happen. This is our world now.” Ethan pulled out his splatling, turning to the others while the swordfight continued below them. “Of course I’ve got a reason.” Taylor started, pulling her blade away. “Telling you is another story.” She blocked a series of Marcus’s strikes, rolling under the last one to send him stumbling forwards from his own momentum. He turned around, running a few inches before plunging his sword into the skull for enough leverage to dropkick Taylor. She blocked the kick with her sword, pushing outwards to disarm him while knocking him onto his back. She grabbed his sword, dual-wielding the blades. Above them, Ethan, Sydney, and Madison continually fired plasma from their splatling and splattershots while the two dagger wielders slashed at its back until it finally fell off the railing. “Well then. Looks like the museum got its newest exhibit.” Kat remarked. Below them, the other two kept fighting. “You know, it would’ve been a lot easier if you just stayed with me.” Taylor claimed, slicing at Marcus. “What, you constantly disrespecting me and making every little decision for me?” He unfolded his splatling to block her repeated strikes. “Hard pass.” “I loved you, but you had to take that away! Just like you took my face!” She swung her sword into the splatling hard enough to cut the metal. “You forced a kiss on me, cheated on me, tried to force me to go back out with you, and tried to kill me!” He screamed, kicking out at her. “And it was that robot that took half your face, not me. Or did it take out half your brain, too?” He stood up, swinging his splatling hard enough to send Taylor to the edge of the skull while disarming her. Glancing to the side, he glimpsed a multicolored object in the temnodontosaurus’s eye socket. “What the…?” He picked it up by its two little spikes, the single eye in the middle staring at him. “That’s mine! Give that to me now, you little welp!” Taylor screeched, as Marcus felt a surge of power. The item gave off a strange aura, as though it were inherently evil. “Sorry. But I’m done with you.” He fired a shot of plasma at her, forcing Taylor to jump off the skull and submerge in her own purple ink to negate the fall damage. “Guys! I got something Taylor wanted; let’s get back to base!” The other five spoke in the affirmative, the group teleporting back to their headquarters.

“So, I take it you guys managed to take out that monster?” Sheldon surmised as the group of six entered the lab. “Yeah, at least they did. I found this.” Mark tossed the item he’d found in the eye socket at the table. “I’m no expert, but there’s some serious dark magic going on with that thing. Also, who’s that guy?” He gestured to the hologram. “I am professor E. Gadd. Now, if there’s dark magic in this item, then perhaps it’s tied to whatever turned Mario into a statue. Just give me time to analyze it, and with any luck he should be back to normal in just a few days.” “Yes! Thank you, professor!” Luigi practically jumped in his excitement. “Thanks for finding this!” “Hey, no problem. Now I’ve gotta go see if Sean still needs a new assistant.”


	4. Evil Unmasked part IV: the lord of flames

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah, that whole livestream thing didn't go quite as planned. Pro tip: don't plan something days in advance. Also, good game team mushroom. I may be disappointed that I lost my first splatfest, but at least we had a worthy opponent.

Taylor screamed, a stabbing pain in her head inflicted by the entity that had graced her mind last december. “I’m sorry, my lord.” She breathed, enduring the punishment. “I failed you… I swear, I will find the other pieces and take back the one I lost.”

“Hey, could I work for you at Ammo Knights now that I'm an official citizen?” Katherine requested while Sheldon analyzed the thing they’d recently found. “I’m really interested in weapons, plus I can’t sleep until my dualies are perfectly cleaned.” “Kat, I’m going to tell you the same thing I told you the last dozen times you asked: until I finish supervising the rebuilding of Shellendorf Institute, I can’t afford to pay an assistant. Plus, between helping the others restore Mario to normal and supervising my shop, that won’t happen anytime soon.” “Right, right, sorry. So, why exactly are you in charge of repairing the museum? Judging by the name, I’m guessing it’s connected to a relative of yours.” “Correct. It was originally built by my great-grandfather Ammoni before my grandfather Ammoses joined the original Squidbeak Splatoon during the great turf war. I inherited it just a few years ago, before the founding of the New Squidbeak Splatoon.” “Oh. Sorry it got busted by that Aiga-aiba-chamu- that guy.” “Well, it’s hardly your fault. Besides, it’s better than simply letting it rampage through Inkopolis unimpeded.” "True. So, how long do you think it'll take to fix the statue guy?" "Well, the artifact your team found contains some very powerful dark magic. The professor has found similarities between the residual magic on Mario and both King Boo's magic and the artifact, like they were combined to turn him to stone. We should have him out today." "Good. How's Luigi?" "He's happy about getting his brother back, but we've had to keep him secret for now. After all, things didn't go so well last time we got help from another dimension, and with the recent monster sightings, the last thing we need is widespread panic." "Yeah, I guess that's understandable. Still, I fought alongside Luigi in the mansion. Ask the others; he could really be an asset to the team." “I see where you’re coming from, but the captain’s made it clear he believes the risk outweighs the potential benefits of allowing them to join the agency.” “Alright, well, I’m going back home now. Good luck with the statue guy.” Katherine waved at Sheldon, walking out of the lab. Sheldon turned on the device they’d been using to communicate with professor E. Gadd, screaming in horror at the sight of the diminutive scientist completely naked with water and mist surrounding him. “Crab man!” E. Gadd hastily grabbed a towel to wrap around himself. “What did I tell you about contacting me during my morning shower?!” “I’m sorry! Just-how close are you to coming to this dimension?” Sheldon inquired, covering his eyes. “I should be there in just a few hours. By then, we should be able to restore Mario to normal.” “Excellent. Now I’ve been thinking, you could potentially help the New Squidbeak Splatoon expand our arsenal ten-fold. With the recent monster attacks, we could certainly use the help.” The professor thought for a few seconds, casually putting a robe on. “Well, I can’t exactly give my services up for free. I’ll need some form of compensation.” “I suppose I could talk to the captain about payment, but I doubt our currencies are compatible.” “Not to worry. As a scientist, I would greatly appreciate the chance to study your dimension and its inhabitants in lieu of monetary payment.” “I believe I could convince the others to consent to some studies. However, if any of your experiments prove harmful...” “I beg your pardon!” Professor E. Gadd gaped, offended. “Do I look like someone who’d hurt another living creature?” “Well, my eyes are still burning; does that count?” “Nevermind that. Now if you’ll excuse me, I want you to turn that communicator off so I can finish my shower. We’ll continue when I’m decent.” “Very well.” Sheldon turned off the device, causing the hologram to disappear.

“Hey, Kat.” Marcus pulled up a chair next to his friend in the middle of the plaza. “How’s your day been?” “Not bad. Sheldon’s still too busy to hire me, but Luigi’s brother should be out of the statue before long. How’s your first day at work been so far?” “Not exactly glamorous, but someone’s gotta clean out the grease traps. Plus, I’m on break right now. Really, I was just lucky I managed to get the job before someone else at all.” “Yeah, took a while to actually get hired, didn’t it?” “I guess that’s just how it works.” He shrugged. “Oh, hey. I can’t believe I never told you, but I got an actual last name as part of the whole citizenship thing, since, y’know, amnesia.” “Really now? So, what is it?” He asked, fairly certain he already knew the answer. “Myers. I figured since I’m already practically your adopted sister, I might as well make it official.” Marcus grinned. “It’s got a nice ring to it. Of course, now we really can’t start a relationship.” “Don’t flatter yourself, Mark.” She chuckled. “You’re nice and all, but you’re not exactly my type.” Before he could respond, an explosion went off in the nearby news studio. “Oh crudcakes; Pearl and Marina are in there!” Katherine screamed, weaving through the tables and fleeing civilians towards the flames. Marcus jumped over an empty table, using it as a springboard before rolling under another table to continue maneuvering through the cluster. As soon as they made it past the civilians, Mark fired a blast of plasma at the wall. “C’mon, we’ve got an opening!” They jumped inside, tossing splatbombs to disperse the flames with small explosions of purple and green ink. “Marina!” Katherine screamed, choking on the smog. “Pearl! Where are you two? We need to get out of here!” “Get down!” Marcus pushed her to the floor, reminding her, “We need to stay below the smoke, or else we’ll suffocate.” “Yeah, okay.” As they crawled through the flaming studio, a siren could be heard approaching. “Someone must’ve called the fire department.” Katherine surmised, kneeling on one leg to shoot purple ink from her dualies into the fire. “Yeah, no complaints here. My weapon’s too heavy; you clear a path.” Marcus responded. Katherine nodded, continuing to shoot while keeping her head below the inferno. “Come on, someone might be in there!” A voice commanded, followed by several streams of multicolored ink that gradually put out the fire. “Come on; now we can find them.” Katherine dragged Marcus to his feet, starting to run through the smoke until one of the firefighters called out to them, “Hey! Do you kids have any idea how dangerous it is in here?!” “Look, I’m sorry but we were trying to help our friends; we’re agents. See?” Mark held up his communicator for them to see. “Very well, then. But we’re still going to do our job.” He continued shooting into the blaze. “Oh, by all means.” Katherine agreed. “But we’re going to take our friends to the base; we’ve got an infirmary and we can’t really afford any hospital bills right now.” “Alright. I suppose it’s fine either way, so long as everyone’s safe.” “Thanks.” She jumped over a smoldering desk, finding Pearl and Marina huddled together by the wall. Their tentacle-hair had shriveled significantly from the flames, and their clothes had holes burned into them to reveal charred skin. Katherine tried to wake them up, while Marcus felt their wrists. "They've got a pulse, but it's weak. We need to take them to the infirmary right now." "Right." They activated the transporters, teleporting the four of them back to base.

"Move! Infirmary; now!" Katherine yelled, teleporting into Marina's living room. "Whoa, what's going on?!" Callie jumped up from the couch she was sitting in, glancing at them before helping the teenagers drag the burn victims into a room with a dozen hospital beds and several pieces of medical equipment. “Sheldon! We need you in the infirmary to deal with some burn wounds; now!” Kat called over the intercom on the wall. “I’ll be right over.” His response was immediate, and his tone worried. “What happened? How did they get burned so badly?” Callie asked, setting the two on the stark white beds. “I don’t know. We were just sitting by the Crust Bucket, and the next thing we knew, the studio was up in smoke.” Katherine explained hurriedly. “If the fire department hadn’t gotten there, I don’t know if we would’ve found them at all.” The door opened as Sheldon and Luigi entered the room. “I heard some sort of commotion, and I thought maybe I could help.” The green-capped human explained. “That depends. Do you have any experience dealing with...” Sheldon stood on a stool to examine the injuries. “Second, possibly third-degree burns by the looks of it.” “Oh, no, no.” Luigi backed away, looking almost queasy. “I have some experience as a doctor, but burns… No, sorry.” “Right, well, unfortunately, they’re definitely in bad shape. If you three hadn’t gotten them here sooner, they likely wouldn’t have survived. Of course, this’ll put a delay on getting Mario out of that statue.” “Oh. I- I understand. You need to help your friends.” “Precisely. You three need to let the others know. Callie, you and Marie will have to report on this. Remember, everyone already knows Pearl and Marina are with the agency. There’s no need for secrecy other than the location of the base.” “Got it. I’ll call Marie and schedule a televised announcement.” Callie walked out of the room. “I’ll go check up on Mario again.” Luigi explained, leaving the new Myers siblings to walk back out onto the living room couch. “Hey.” Mark gently nudged Kat’s shoulder to get her attention. “You alright?” “Yeah, it’s just…” She raised her knees to her chest, closing herself off. “Those two were like mothers to me, helping me through the Deepsea Metro. They helped me keep track of the days, made sure I never gave up even when escaping seemed impossible, and sometimes we would just talk on the transceiver about what I’d do when I got to the surface. Shockingly enough, joining a secret agency to save the world wasn’t really at the top of my list.” “Oh. Yeah, I guess you did always seem kinda fond of them. But relax; Sheldon’s one of the best medics I know. Here, see this?” He lifted his shirt. “Marcus, I already told you you’re not my type. And even if you were, is now really the time?” “What? No, look here.” He pointed to his chest, Kat leaning to get a closer look. “It’s just a scratch.” “That ‘scratch’...” He started, pulling his shirt back down. “...nearly got me killed. Back when I was trying to take the great zapfish back from Octavio-so around the same time you were in the metro, I think-I got blasted by an octoling with a charger. My armor got broken off earlier, so the shot went right into my heart. The other two were still working, so I managed to barely retreat. I don’t remember much of what happened other than Sheldon being the medic. By next week, it was like nothing happened. Trust me, if anyone can get them back up, it’s him.” “Thanks.” She put her legs back down, her posture more relaxed. “That’s good to know. I mean, not the part where you almost died, of course, but...” “Hey, at least I got a story for the grandkids. Besides, we’re secret agents. Near-death experiences are practically a weekly occurrence for us.” “Yeah, I know. Anyway, I’ll call Lauren and tell her what happened. You can groupchat the S4, right?” “Yeah, of course.” He pulled out his cell phone while Kat dialed the number on hers. “Hey, Lauren, I need to tell you something.” “Yeah? I’m kind of trying to make my lunch here.” “It’s important. Marina and Pearl were in a fire a few minutes ago; they’re in the infirmary now.” There was a second of silence, followed by the slightly audible clatter of a pot and some silverware on the floor. “What? What happened?” “I’m not sure. There was a fire in the news studio where they work, and Mark and I managed to get them out with help from the civilian fire department.” “Oh. I-I’m sorry to hear that. How’re they doing?” “Sheldon’s working on treating them as we speak. Hopefully, they’ll be back up in a few days.” “That’s good. Any clue what could’ve caused it?” Kat thought for a moment before answering, “I’m honestly not sure. Still, considering how sudden it was, not to mention our track record, it might’ve been some sort of monster.” “Great. A fire monster; just what we need.” Lauren muttered under her breath. “I’ll keep an eye out for any more fires that suddenly pop up. Who else knows?” “Callie, Sheldon, and Luigi. Marcus and Callie are telling the S4 and Marie right now.” “Okay, good. Too bad we had to get someone else in the infirmary just a few days after I got out.” “Yeah, I guess we’re really putting the med team through some work lately.” Kat chuckled to herself. “I think someone’s going to tell the captain; he can help with the burn wounds.” “Okay. Anything else you need to talk about?” “No, not right now.” “Hey, Kat?” Marcus piped up. “I just finished group-texting the S4. D’you mind if I talk to Lauren real quick? I want to ask her something.” “Uh… Yeah, sure.” She casually tossed her phone at the inkling, who easily caught it. “Hey, Lauren, I was just wondering something.” “Yeah, buddy, what is it?” “Ethan just told me you said you wouldn’t be able to balance a job with agent work. But I just got a job, so...” “Yeah, I see your point. Still, I think it’s probably got something to do with how I’ve been an agent for over 2 years. You’ve only been at it for a few months.” “Uh-huh. I guess that kinda makes sense.” He tossed Kat’s phone back for her to hang it up. “Okay. What next?” Katherine asked. Marcus thought for a moment. “I dunno.”

“Hey bro.” Luigi greeted the statue in front of him. “There’s going to be a delay getting you back to normal, but it shouldn’t be too long; maybe a few days. Some of the other guys’ friends got badly hurt, but they’re going to be fine. And then, they’ll figure out a way to bring you back.” He didn’t know if Mario could hear him, but he needed to assure himself as much as his brother. “Luigi!” Sheldon’s voice distracted him as he entered the lab. “Good news. The captain just came over to help with Pearl and Marina’s burns, which means I can get back to working on saving your brother.” “Really?!” Luigi hugged Sheldon, beaming with joy. “Thank you! Thank you so much, little crab!” “Well, it’ll be difficult if I can’t breathe.” Sheldon muttered, Luigi releasing him. “Right, right, sorry.” Sheldon checked the clock on the wall before activating the device to communicate with E. Gadd. “Professor, are you ready to cross through the dimensional barrier?” “Almost. I’m still putting the finishing touches on the device that’ll free Mario.” “How long will that take, professor?” Luigi asked. “Shouldn’t be any longer than an hour. I take it the dimensional transporter is working?” He turned to Sheldon. “Yes, but it’s still not fully operational. Marina was badly injured in a fire earlier, so it’ll take longer to finish.” “Understood. My condolences.” “Thank you. The recovery process is moving along smoothly, and they should be back up in a few days. They've already started regaining consciousness, though I think I heard Pearl mutter something about a 'chair oof'. I'm not sure what that means." Sheldon's communicator started beeping. "Hello?" "Sheldon, there's been an explosion downtown. Me and the other agents are going to investigate." Kat's voice came through. "Okay. All of you, be careful. If this is a monster, then no doubt it's extremely dangerous." "Yeah, no kidding. Don't worry, the seven of us can handle ourselves." "Understood." Sheldon hung up the communicator.

Katherine, Marcus, Lauren, Ethan, Sydney, Trent, and Madison sprinted around the corner of a building, where the middle of the street was engulfed in flames. The cement around the fire had partially melted away, while the buildings had started to overheat from the blaze. “Woah! This is even worse than the studio!” Kat shouted, turning to the other agents. “Trent, Syd, you two make sure there’s no civilians in their cars or on the street. Ethan, some of the doors might've welded shut from the heat; use your splatling to bust them open. I’ve heard heat stroke isn’t exactly enviable. Maddie, try to contain the fire as best you can until the civilian fire department gets here; no doubt they’re already on their way. The three of us will take on whatever’s causing this.” “Wait, how do you know whatever caused this is still here?” Trent questioned. The ground beneath them split open, a red crack stretching through the street until a plume of flame burst out from underground. “Does that answer your question? Everyone in position, now!” The group separated while something jumped out of the fire. It was an 8-foot tall humanoid creature made entirely of molten rock and flame. It opened its glowing red maw, speaking, “I am Cherufe, lord of volcanoes.” "Yeah? Well we're the New Squidbeak Splatoon, lords of not giving a flip. C'mon team, let's take this monster down!" Marcus charged forward, firing his splatling. Cherufe opened its mouth, swallowing the bolt of plasma. "Huh. Okay, didn't see that one coming. You two got any plans?" "Here's one: blow it the hell up!" Lauren threw a splatbomb at the creature, an explosion of yellow ink going off inches in front of it. The ink evaporated in midair, leaving Cherufe unaffected. "Well. Shoot." "If shooting doesn't work, maybe stabbing will do the trick." Katherine shifted her dualies into daggers, rushing at the magma creature. "You two, cover me!" Cherufe opened its mouth, spitting a fireball at Katherine. She turned one of her daggers back into a ranged weapon, firing a line of purple ink onto the concrete. Diving into the trail as an octopus, she let the fireball pass overhead before jumping out as a humanoid. She turned her remaining dualie back into a dagger, slashing at Cherufe. The metal sparked against the molten rock, Katherine stepping back from the heat on the daggers. Yelling in pain, she barely managed to roll out of the way as Cherufe tossed a small flaming slab of concrete at her. "Guys, this is bad. He's immune to all our weapons." "We need backup. I'm calling the others." Marcus pulled out his communicator, backflipping over a fireball before contacting the S4 members. "Guys, we're getting knocked around like rag dolls! Finish up whatever you're doing and get over here!" "Wait, what about the civilians?" Katherine realized, turning around a split second before she had to sidestep a flaming slab of concrete. "We'll have to hope they got everyone out already. Besides, it'll be way worse if we don't stop that thing." "I… yeah, you've got a point." The rest of the seven-man team rendezvoused with the three, firing their weapons harmlessly at Cherufe. It laughed, a rough, harsh noise that grated on the ears. "It matters not how many you are. I will burn this world to the ground, until it is reduced to primordial molten lava. It will be my paradise, and your hell." "Alright, what's the plan?" Ethan inquired. "We're working on that part. None of our weapons are having any effect on this guy." Lauren informed them. Cherufe stomped its foot on the ground, forcing them to dodge a massive crack in the middle of the street.

“Okay professor, I’ve finished the dimensional transporter. Have you finished on your end?” Sheldon asked the scientist in the blue hologram while Callie, Marie, and Luigi watched their conversation. “The de-statue-ficationizer is ready for its first official use. I’ve used the data provided by you from the object your team recovered, combined with my own vast knowledge of King Boo’s magic, to create a device guaranteed to restore Mario to normal or your money back.” “Great! Let’s fire it up then!” Luigi took a silver inch-thick disc off the table and started fumbling around with it. “How exactly does this thing work?” “Like this.” Sheldon jumped up, taking his invention from the taller human. He pressed a series of buttons on the side of the disc before tossing it into the middle of the room. The middle of the device folded into the edge to hollow out while splitting into segments, expanding until the opening could occupy multiple people at once. The opening sparked for a few seconds until it was filled with a swirling, multicolored glow. E. Gadd looked to the side as a similar glow appeared on his end of the communicator. “Well now, I suppose that’s my cue.” Sheldon nodded, turning off the interdimensional communicator. Seconds later, the portal started shifting, almost resembling ripples in a lake, until the professor stepped into the base. “Wow. You look a lot less blue now.” Callie remarked. “I could say the same. Now, the moment of truth.” He pulled out a device resembling the nozzle on one of the poltergusts, aiming it at Mario. “And you’re sure this’ll work?” Marie asked nervously. “Of course. Granted, there is a 1% chance it might rip apart the barrier between our dimensions, but I’m certain that won’t happen this time.” Before anyone could question him, E Gadd fired a multicolored beam out of the device. The statue was covered in a white glow, until the professor turned the device off. “Woah...” Another human, slightly shorter and pudgier than Luigi, with an oversized mustache wearing a similar outfit to his, except red where Luigi’s was green and an M on the cap instead of an L, stumbled forward. “Mama-mia, I haven’t felt this messed up since the Last Resort.” “Mario!” Luigi rushed forward, embracing his brother while crying into his shoulder from relief. “It’s alright, Luigi. I knew you could do it the whole time.” “Wait, you knew what was going on?” “Of course; I could see and hear the whole time. I never lost hope you would find me. Though, admittedly, I wasn’t expecting your new friends here.” “Oh, yeah, I guess I don’t have to introduce them, do I?” “Hey, guys, I hate to break up the family reunion, but...” Marie pointed up to the television hanging on the wall that Sheldon had on as white noise while he worked. A news story showed the seven agents fighting some sort of creature made of fiery rock, clearly forced onto the defensive. “Woah! Hey, it’s those kids from the mansion! We have to help them!” Mario called. “No way. Me and Callie will go provide backup. You two have to stay a secret.” “Wait, Marie, what if they could help us?” Callie argued. “Yeah, I’ve seen Mario fight! Trust me, you’ll want him on your side.” A high-pitched voice sounded. Mario’s cap flew off his head, floating in midair while a pair of oversized red eyes appeared on the front. “And now the hat is talking. Of course.” Marie remarked. Callie turned to the taller of the two brothers. “Hey Luigi, can your hat do that?” “No.” He lamented, hanging his head. “Name’s Cappy. I met Mario when he fell into my hometown, Bonneton. We went on an adventure together, and we’ve been friends ever since.” “Cappy’s one of my most valuable allies, almost as much as Luigi.” The group looked back up at the news, showing the group having to dodge a massive crack appearing in the ground. “Alright.” Marie relented. “Mario, Luigi, you two can come with us to help the others fight that monster.” “Yahoo! The Mario brothers are back in action!” the red-shirted man backflipped in excitement. “Wait, Mario brothers?” Sheldon questioned. “Yeah, that’s our names- Luigi Mario and Mario Mario. Our parents weren’t very imaginative.” Luigi explained. “Well, what’re we waiting for? Let’s get going already!” Callie declared excitedly.

Cherufe breathed a swath of fire at the agents, forcing them to jump over the flames. “Hey guys, I just realized there’s a gas station on the other side of the block.” Marcus announced as they started to stand up. “Oh crud, you’re right. Guys, we have to stop it from getting there!” Lauren realized. “And just how do you suppose we do that? We can’t even lay a finger on this guy!” Trent pointed out. “I grow bored of this.” Cherufe stated, burying itself into the ground. A red crack appeared in the ground, marking Cherufe’s trail. “Oh no. It’s headed for the gas station; we have to intercept it!” Lauren yelled, starting to run in the direction of the monster. The team fired ink out of their weapons, swimming through the viscous liquid in their cephalopod forms to increase their speed. After some time, Cherufe burst out of the ground a hundred feet in front of a gas station. The seven teenagers stood between them, brandishing their weapons. “You think you can stop me? I will burn you to the bone, and rend your city to embers.” “Joke’s on you! We’re invertebrates!” Lauren yelled, as a group of four turned the corner next to them. “Guys, you’re here! I take it this guy’s Mario?” Katherine gestured to the shorter of the two humans. “Yup, that’s me. Now, let’s do this!” Cherufe spat a fireball at the group, Mario charging forward to grab it. The fireball was only slowed, Mario digging his heels into the ground as the flaming sphere continued to push against him. “Luigi! Could use some help here!” “Oh! Right!” Luigi snapped out of his nervous stupor, taking hold of Cherufe’s fireball next to his brother. They simultaneously pushed against the flames, tossing it back to its creator. “What?!” The fireball exploded on Cherufe, the force knocking him away several feet. “That was awesome! I knew you two would be good for the team!” Katherine congratulated them. “Let’s go, team; no one hold back!” Marie twirled her charger. “Sorry, but all our weapons had no effect on that thing.” Mark informed her. Mario tossed Cappy, who stayed in the air long enough for the brothers to jump on before flying back to his head. Cherufe swiped its arm forward, knocking them onto the ground. “We can’t just let them fight it alone. C’mon!” Callie charged forward, pushing her roller on the ground. The Mario brothers rolled to either side, allowing Cherufe to punch a smoldering hole where their faces had been. Mario punched it in the stomach while Luigi grabbed it from behind. Callie spun around, tossing her roller hard enough to knock Cherufe to the ground. “Now!” Marcus yelled, as the rest of the group except Marie tossed bags of ice at Cherufe. The creature screamed, as the ice started lowering its temperature, steam billowing out of it. “I don’t believe it. It’s actually working.” Mark muttered, continuing to throw ice while Marie fired plasma from her charger. Once Cherufe was sufficiently weakened, the others started firing their own plasma until it fell over, dead. “Guess he just couldn’t take the heat.” Kat remarked.

"Okay, we have the third piece." Taylor placed the object next to the other two. “Good thing that fire monster showed up and distracted those agents. Last thing I need right now is to face them again.” She grinned, distorting her maimed face. “And now we’re halfway there.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> j
> 
> Good news: the second arc has already been finished, and is plenty ready to go.  
> Feb 27: of souls and needles part I: the hand-tailed dog  
> Mar 6: of souls and needles part II: conquering undead of the north  
> Mar 13: of souls and needles part III: the seven-headed dragon  
> Mar 20: of souls and needles part IV: blood drinker  
> Mar 27: of souls and needles part V: frost prince  
> Apr 3: of souls and needles part VI: three-in-one monster  
> Apr 10: of souls and needles part VII: a global serpent  
> Apr 17: of souls and needles part VIII: the man who conquered death


	5. Evil Unmasked part V: the floating demon head

Mario walked up to the crust bucket, ignoring the inklings and octolings staring at him. “Hello.” “Yeah? Oh, hey man. Guess they’re letting you out in public now?” Marcus greeted him. “Yeah, it’s been great! Anyway, Callie recommended the galactic schwaffle. Is that what it’s called?” “Oh, yeah, we’ve got some of those ready.” As Marcus went to the back of the food truck to retrieve the purchase, Mario wondered aloud, “Y’know, I thought you were cleaning out the grease traps and stuff like that.” “Yeah, usually. But hey, someone’s got to watch the place while Sean goes out to restock on ingredients. Besides, if I don’t screw this up, I’ll get one step closer to being a full-on employee and not just an intern.” He handed the tinfoil-wrapped item to Mario. “Thanks, Mark!” He placed a few of the sea snails Marie had given him onto the counter. “Pleasure doing business with you.” While Mario went back to his table, Cappy floated off his head to perch on the counter. “Hey, Marcus, quick question.” “First off, I’m trying not to commit any health code violations, thank you very much.” He waved the sentient hat off the table before spraying the counter. “Second off, what is it?” “Well, I was just wondering, why’re you staying here if you’re the intern? Shouldn’t you be out shopping?” Marcus shrugged, throwing away the towel he’d been using to dry off the counter. “I managed to convince him to let me watch the crust bucket for an hour. One of my best friends used to work for him a couple years back, so I got her to put in a good word for me.” “So, nepotism.” “Yeah, pretty much. You buying anything?” “Thanks for the offer, but in case you haven’t noticed, I’m a hat. I don’t exactly have a mouth.” “Yeah, fair enough. Anything else?” “No, I’m good.” Cappy floated away, as Mario started eating next to a dark-haired inkling. “So, how is it?” “This is great, Callie! You know, this place almost reminds me of Isle Delfino with all the ink.” “Isle Delfino?” “Yeah, it’s this tropical paradise island. They’ve got great seafood there; crab, lobster, cala...” He paused, looking at the evolved squid in front of him. “Yeah, like I said, this place is really nice.” “Nice save.” Cappy whispered, tipping down from his scalp. A flash of light appeared directly above the crust bucket, replaced by a giant floating woman’s head. Her hair was a stygian black, exposed organs hanging down from the neck. She hissed, baring pairs of pointed, vampiric teeth on the top and bottom of her mouth. Mario jumped off the table, using it as a springboard to throw Cappy in midair. Cappy stayed suspended, allowing Mario to dive onto him with his arms outstretched, flipping off the sentient hat to grab onto the entity's intestines. The head screeched, the force of the sound knocking over tables and chairs as civilians fled the square. Mario tugged on the creature’s organs as it tried to shake him off. “Oh great, just what I need right now.” Marcus muttered, grabbing his splatling from the back of the food truck while rolling out of the back door. He fired a bolt of plasma at the back of the head, causing it to scream in pain while lurching forward. Mario attempted to punch the entity’s stomach, launched off the organ structure onto the street. “Mario!” Callie ran over, helping the human to his feet. “You alright?” “Yeah, I’ve taken worse falls.” The creature soared overhead, forcing them to duck below its intestines. “Hey, get back here!” Marcus tried to fire at the thing, only to miss the shot. “Welp, looks like we’re going headhunting.” Mario turned to the inklings. “So, you two coming?” “Sorry guys, I’ve got to stay at work or else I probably won’t be able to afford groceries this month. Callie, you two can handle this, right?” “Yeah, I’ll just call the others. But can’t you just, I dunno, sell some of your video games?” “Those aren’t going to sell for a lot, plus it’s not exactly a long-term solution.” “Fair enough. I guess we can handle this with just one less agent.” “Thanks for understanding, Cal.” Marcus went back over to the crust bucket while Callie dialed her cell phone. “Hey, Marie. Can you get Luigi? There’s been another monster attack at the square. Alright, thanks, cuz.” She hung up, informing Mario, “They’re on their way. In the meantime, we should probably start looking around for that thing.” “Good thinking. I mean, a giant flying head with organs hanging out of it shouldn’t be too hard to find.” “Yeah, no kidding. C’mon, I think it flew over this way.” She started dragging him by the hand.

“Hey, Luigi, I need your help with something.” Marie knocked on the door to the spare bedroom the brothers had been using at the base. “Can’t I just get a few more hours of sleep?” "sorry man, but there's been a monster attack. We're on call." "I don't know. I've never been that much of a fighter." "Come on, I saw you when we were fighting that fire monster. Besides, Pearl and Marina are still going to need a week or two to recover, and I'd really rather you come with us." After a few seconds of silence, Luigi opened the door. "Okay, okay, let's go." "That's the spirit. C'mon, we've got some teleport beacons set up near the square."

"So, you want to remind me why we're here?" Lauren asked, walking next to Katherine on the roof of a building. "Well, with all the monsters that've been popping up lately, I figured the two of us should start looking around Inkopolis.” “Alright, fair enough, I suppose. Any particular reason why you wanted to do this with me?” The octoling shrugged, answering, “I felt like everyone else was just kinda doing their own thing, plus I like spending time with you. Besides, we’ll want to keep a small party on patrol.” “Yeah, that makes sense. Honestly, I like hanging out with you, too. Probably has something to do with everything that happened in the metro.” “Yeah, nothing like fighting to the death while one of us is being mind-controlled by a psycho phone to get the friendship juices pumping.” Kat chuckled quietly to herself before realizing out loud, “Y’know, it just occurred to me our lives are kind of weird.” “Personally, I just take it as it comes. Hey, what’s that down there?” She pointed down at the street. “What? I don’t see anything.” “It was… I don’t know, it looked like some sort of trail of black light.” “Black light? You sure?” “Well, it looked like light, and it was black. Sorry, but I’m really not sure how else to describe it.” Lauren insisted. “Alright, guess it couldn’t hurt to investigate.” “Well, if we get in a fight it might hurt. Which, knowing us...” “Yeah, yeah, you know what I mean. C’mon, let’s get going.” Lauren nodded her agreement, casually backflipping off the edge of the roof.

“So, Luigi, how’re you liking this place so far?” The green-clothed human looked around the city, with its skyscrapers and neon signs. The street they were walking on the side of was populated by dozens of cars going in both directions.as the two searched for the disembodied head. “Well, I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’s nice and all, but I really want to get back to the Mushroom Kingdom.” “Mushroom Kingdom?” Marie looked at him quizzically. “Is that where you and Mario are from?” “Yeah!” Luigi grinned. “Well, we were born on Yoshi Island, but we’ve spent most of our time in the Mushroom Kingdom.” “Yoshi… Okay, so, what exactly do you guys do there? For a living, I mean.” “Plumbing, mostly. Some call us the dukes of drains, or the princes of pipes.” “Sounds very prestigious.” Marie deadpanned. “Well, the pipes aren’t going to plumb themselves. Besides, it pays surprisingly well. Now, any idea where we should go?” “Yeah, Callie texted me to meet her and Mario at Arowana mall. Shouldn’t be too far from here, and then we can go searching for the monster.” “Are you sure the four of us can handle it on our own?” “Yeah, it’s just a giant head. What’s the worst that could happen?” “In my experience, it’s usually best not to ask that question.” Marie shrugged in response, continuing to walk down the street.

Lauren shot a puddle of yellow ink onto the sidewalk, submerging in her squid form before jumping back out as a humanoid while Katherine did the same next to her. “Come on, I think it went this way.” She gestured forward, pulling the octoling by the arm. “Alright, alright, I’m coming!” They approached the entrance to a warehouse, where something had knocked the door inwards. “Okay. Now I definitely believe you.” “Yes! Vindication!” Lauren quietly celebrated as the two ran inside the building. As they moved deeper inside, the sunlight from outside started to disappear from the doorway. “So, why do you think the lights are all off?” Kat asked, looking at Lauren’s tentacles as her bioluminescence became their only source of light. “This warehouse is probably out of commission for some reason. Nobody works here anymore, so no use keeping the lights on.” “Yeah, that does explain why all the shelves are empty.” As they conversed, they both made sure to keep their voices down so as not to alert any hostiles to their presence. “You know, those tentacles of yours aren’t exactly helping our stealth.” “Yeah, well, I can’t exactly turn them off. Besides, your tentacles don’t glow, so you should be fine.” As they continued walking, making sure to move slowly so even their footsteps were rendered silent, they heard something that sounded like wind. “Hey, keep your guard up. I think whatever’s in here is close by.” Katherine instructed, as they stood back-to-back holding their weapons. “So, you want to try and call him out now, or should we wait until he shows himself?” Before Kat could respond, the sound of an arrow being nocked preceded her screaming in pain and falling to the floor. “Kat! What happened?” Lauren knelt next to her friend, pulling one of her longer tentacle-hairs until the light fell on a purple arrow embedded inch-deep in Katherine’s shoulder. The inkling turned around, conjuring a splatbomb in her hand to throw in the general direction the arrow had come from before pulling the octoling’s hand away from the projectile. “No, don’t try and take it out. That’ll just make it worse.” Kat pointed behind her with her other hand, sputtering, “B-beh-hi-” Lauren turned, holding up her splattershot to block a strike from some metallic weapon. She could barely discern the outline of a sword as her arm was knocked aside by the force of the blow, barely maintaining her grip on the splattershot. She fired a bolt of plasma, eliciting a cry of pain. “Gotcha now!” She jumped up, punching at the attacker, only for her fist to connect with empty hair. Stumbling from her own momentum, the teenager looked around, barely managing to roll out of the way in time to avoid a purple arrow in her eye. She turned onto her back on the floor, firing a blast of plasma before getting up. This time, there was no sound. “Hey! Show yourself, coward!” “I’m no coward.” A deep voice sounded directly behind her. “Just smart.” She swung her splattershot to block another sword strike, this time leaning into the weapon to grab it out of her opponent’s hand. “Hey! Give that back, you glow-headed little freak!” “Not a chance!” Lauren fired a bolt of plasma out of her splattershot, hearing the sound of a blade cutting through the air that told her the attack had been blocked. She followed up by swinging the sword in her other hand, leaning forward on one leg to get closer to her opponent. He was unable to block the hit, Lauren’s tentacles briefly revealing a dark-haired face grimacing in pain as she cut open a black shirt. “How exactly am I the freak here? You’re the one who attacked us out of nowhere!” She held up the sword she’d pilfered, blocking a strike that left her stumbling backwards while forcing the blade out of her hand. “That’s what happens to underworld creatures that bring us into another dimension!” The glint of a blade told her to take a step back, only for the flat of a blade to slam into her stomach. Knocked onto the ground, the purple glow of an arrow appeared overhead. “Wait a second, we didn’t send you here. We’re not sure what’s going on.” “Don’t lie to me!” He snarled. “I’m guessing you two are rogue generals of Medusa’s we haven’t taken out yet, aren’t you?” “What? No, I swear I don’t know any medusa!” She threw her weapon, holding up her two longest tentacle-hairs so he could see her face. “See? I’m unarmed!” The arrow lowered almost imperceptibly, as though the combatant was hesitating, before the outline of a small ranged weapon appeared next to his head. “St-stop.” Katherine breathed out, holding one of her dualies to the stranger’s head with one hand while holding her injured shoulder with the other. “I-I’ll sh-shoot.” “Kat, wait!” Lauren stood up, arms outstretched. “I think I’m getting through to him!” The arrow disappeared while the outline of the bow split into two swords that turned downwards. “Alright. Come to think of it, I doubt underworld creatures are capable of protecting each other. Besides, you two are pretty shoddy fighters even by underworld standards.” “I-hey, what’s that supposed to mean?” Lauren snapped indignantly. “Well, first of all, you’re supposed to use your opposite leg when you swing a sword so your weight is more evenly distributed. Second, you need to lean toward your opponent when blocking an attack. Otherwise, you’re just letting them press the advantage.” “Yeah, well, I’ve always been more of a sharpshooter anyway.” Her eyes widened. “Katherine!” She ran over to the octoling, gently setting her on her hands and knees while her face turned stark white. “No, no, no, no.” Someone called out, “Pittoo!” He responded, “Over here!”, firing a glowing purple arrow straight upwards. A few seconds later, footsteps echoed loudly through the warehouse until someone else approached them. “What happened here?” “Ask them.” The second newcomer knelt next to Lauren, using the light from her tentacles to look at the octoling’s shoulder. A bright purple welt had grown around the arrow, oozing pus. “Oh. Wow, that… that’s really bad.” He covered his mouth as though resisting the urge to vomit, turning to the one he’d called Pittoo. “What happened? Did they attack you?” “No, he shot her unprovoked.” Lauren snarled. “I didn’t know if they were hostile or not. I figured it’d be better to fight the one with the glowing hair so I could actually see her in the dark.” "Yeah, well, do you two plan on invading our city?" Lauren asked, helping Kat sit up against a shelf. "What? No way! We defend the innocent!" The one next to her shouted. "Well, I do anyway. Not really sure about Pittoo sometimes." "Can it, Pit." Sunlight flooded into the warehouse as the roof collapsed above them, wood and rubble falling to the floor a few feet away. A giant head screeched, flying in through the hole with its organs hanging below its stump of a neck. Lauren could now see that Pit wore a white-and-gold toga with a golden laurel and bright white wings on his back, while Pittoo had a black-and-purple toga, purple laurel, and black wings. “I am Krasue!” The head wailed, its voice sounding like nails on a chalkboard. “Friend of yours?” Lauren inquired. “No, but this isn’t my first disembodied head.” Pit explained, “I’ve got some healing magic on me, just enough to make sure your friend survives. You two, hold off that monster.” “Okay. Whaddaya say, Pittoo? Ready to put aside our differences?” “I’ve taken out worse freaks than that solo.” He ran off, attaching his swords by the hilts to form a bow. Gesturing on an invisible drawstring, a glowing purple arrow appeared before being let loose. Krasue dove out of the way of the projectile, hitting Pittoo hard enough with her intestines that he was knocked several feet away, rolling on the ground before coming to a stop. “Yeah, I can see you’ve really got this one in the bag.” “Oh, and just what do you plan on doing?” "Well, first off…" Lauren dialed her communicator. "I'm going to call in a miracle."

Marie and Luigi walked through the entrance to Arowana mall, immediately finding Mario and Callie waiting at a nearby table in the middle of the food court. “Oh, good, you’re here.” Mario waved them over. “I’m guessing you two didn’t find the monster?” Luigi surmised. “Hardly. I could’ve sworn we saw it flying over this way, but we managed to lose it. Honestly, you’d think a giant screeching head with exposed organs would be easier to keep track of.” Callie explained bitterly. “Okay, well, in any case, we need to figure out where it is before it causes too much damage.” Marie responded, leading the group further into the building. “You know, this is honestly kind of fitting.” Callie commented. “I mean, these guys are the Mario brothers, we’re the squid sisters, it makes sense we’d team up.” “Wait, I thought you two were cousins.” Mario pointed out. “Well, yeah, but that’s a lot less alliterative.” Callie reasoned. “Isn’t your last name Cuttlefish?” Luigi questioned. “Eh, we decided that didn’t really have the same ring to it.” Marie explained, “Besides, we were raised together in calamari county, so I guess we kind of see each other more as sisters anyway.” “Oh, now isn’t this sweet?” The four turned around to see an inkling with purple hair standing in the middle of the open room, a variety of stores lining the walls. “Taylor!” Callie shouted, the two cousins pulling out their weapons while the brothers assumed fighting stances. “I’m guessing this is the girl your friend used to go out with?” “No, Mario, we’re pulling our weapons out on a random civilian for shoplifting.” Marie gestured at Taylor with her two-handed charger. “So, what’s your game plan here?” “What, can’t a girl go on a little shopping trip? By the way, where’s Mark?” “He’s at work, but we can take you on just fine!” Mario ran at Taylor, who took out her inkbrush to swing at him. The weapon glowed a deep purple as it cut through a wide swath of ground, sending the humans and inklings flying backwards while reducing a section of floor to rubble. “Guys!” Cappy floated in the air, knocked off Mario’s head by the force of the blast. “Are you alright?” “Yeah. Mama-mia, attacked by a kid with a magic paintbrush… this really is Isle Delfino all over again.” As they stood up, Taylor approached them with her inkbrush raised in the air. She slammed it vertically onto the ground, forcing the group to jump out of the way of a growing crack in the floor. Mario tossed Cappy, jumping on him to gain a boost in height. Taylor grinned, swinging her inkbrush diagonally to knock him out of the air. Marie fired her charger, Taylor knocking the blast of plasma away with her inkbrush. “Hey, what’s that on your neck?” Luigi asked nervously, pointing at a string around her throat tied to blunt spikes on three multicolored objects. “Oh, you like this? Believe me, it’s given me so much power!” She spun her brush in a full circle, knocking the four back down to the ground. “But I can have more power.” She tossed a splatbomb at Callie and Marie, forcing them to jump out of the way of a massive explosion that knocked them into the air before falling back to the ground. “Wow. She really is stronger.” Callie realized, both standing up. Mario grabbed Taylor by the legs from behind, spinning her multiple times before tossing her through the air. “So long, Taylor!” “You little...” She swung her inkbrush wildly in the air,sending up a cloud of dust. By the time it cleared, Luigi was helping the others to their feet amongst a crater in the concrete floor of the mall. “Oh, so there it is.” The brush-wielder knelt down, picking up a small item that had formerly been buried. “Four down, two to go.” She disappeared in a blinding flash of purple light. “No. That- that did not just happen.” Callie insisted, gesturing wildly at where Taylor had just been. “I- I don’t… We need to warn the others, right now.” She started dialing her communicator just as it started beeping. “Oh, great, what now? Hey, what’s wrong? We’re kind of in the middle of something here. What? Okay, Lauren, slow down. Okay, yeah, we’ve been looking for that. Just hold on- what? Who? O-okay, I… Well, is she alright? Okay, we’ll be right over.” She turned off the device, explaining to the others, “Lauren and Kat are fighting the head in an abandoned warehouse at 34th street, Kat got injured but she’s being treated, and they’ve encountered two guys from another dimension.” “What? You mean like us?” Cappy wondered aloud. “Sounds like it. Come on, they need backup.”

Lauren fired plasma from her splattershot, hitting Krasue with no reaction. The creature swung its organ structure, Pittoo rolling out of the way before slicing at it with both of his swords. Krasue wrapped its intestines around the dark-winged humanoid, who fused his swords into a bow to fire a spectral arrow into the entity’s eye. “You little-!” It screeched, releasing Pittoo for him to glide backwards onto the ground. “You alright, Pittoo?” “Don’t call me that! Call me by my real name.” He demanded of the inkling. “Alright, sorry, what’s your real name then?” “Dark Pit.” He answered, spinning his dual blades while grinning as though it were a name worthy of gods. “Oh, right, because that’s so much more dignified.” They both ducked under Krasue, Lauren grabbing onto its intestine as it trailed past them. “Hey! Could you be any more impulsive?” Dark Pit loosed a dozen mystical arrows, some hitting the back of Krasue’s head or organs while Lauren knocked a few away with her weapon, barely maintaining her grip on the creature with her other hand. “I thought we were done trying to kill each otheeeerrrr!” Krasue hooked its organ structure, tossing Lauren onto the ground. She hit her back on the hardwood floor, skidding for several feet before pivoting on her hand to jump back to a standing position. “How are you standing? That should’ve broken your spine!” Pit acknowledged, looking away from Katherine. “And that’s why being an invertebrate is awesome. How’s Kat coming along?” “I’m fine.” She stood up, a small stain of purple ink-blood where the arrow had been. “Let’s take that thing down.” Krasue swung at Dark Pit as he jumped above it, kicking off the shelf behind him while it collapsed. He glided at Krasue, swinging his swords to stab her in the face. "Pit, can you fly me at that thing?" Katherine requested. "Sorry, but without the power of flight, the best I can do is a quick glide." Krasue flew over them, bursting through the front wall of the warehouse. "Try to keep up!" Dark Pit pushed past Lauren, the other three following him out of the building., As they ran into the street, Mario, Marie, Luigi, and Callie turned a nearby corner. “Guys, we made it!” Luigi looked at the two newcomers. “I’m guessing these are your new friends?” “Yeah, Pit and-” “No time for introductions.” Dark Pit interrupted Kat, running towards Krasue at the end of the street. “Straightforward, isn’t he?” Mario pointed out. “Yeah, you get used to it.” Pit shrugged, as the group followed Dark Pit. “Mario, remember when you spun Taylor around and threw her?” Callie held up her roller. “Think you can do something similar with me?” He grinned, answering emphatically, “Oh yeah! I like the way you think, little squid girl!” Callie jumped directly in front of Mario, allowing him to easily grab her by the legs and start spinning her. She pressed the firing mechanism on her roller, surrounding them with a wide circle of magenta ink as they moved towards Krasue. Some of the ink landed in its eyes, causing it to screech in pain while Dark Pit fired an arrow into its forehead. “Mario, toss me!” Mario let go of Callie, sending her flying at the creature. She conjured a pair of splatbombs, shapeshifting so the explosions would propel her further. She grabbed onto Krasue’s hair, hastily climbing on top while it slammed itself into the nearby building. “Hah! It’ll take more than that to shake me, you calamitous cranium!” Krasue turned itself upside-down, spinning in the air for a few seconds until Callie fell back to the ground. “Yeah, that’ll do it.” She muttered, Kat helping her up. “Listen, we ran into Taylor. She’s got these things that are making her crazy powerful.” “What?” Krasue swung its organs at them, knocking the two to the ground while Pit and Luigi grabbed onto its viscera. “You’re not from this dimension either, are you?” Pit sliced into the creature as Luigi answered, “No, I came here somehow with my brother Mario.” “Same here.” Krasue shook them off, Pit jumping off Luigi’s head to glide at the thing while firing a spectral arrow into its eye. On the ground below, Dark Pit shot its other eye. Krasue writhed and screamed in pain before falling to the ground, dead. “Yes! That’s what happens when you go off the straight and arrow!” Pit celebrated, raising one of his swords into the air as his doppelganger responded, “Who wrote this?” Nearby, Katherine’s communicator started beeping. “Oh, hi Mark. Uh, sorry man, we just got done killing it. But, as long as you’re on break, meet us at the base. We’ve got plenty to talk about.”

“Alright, so these guys-” Marcus gestured to the Pits, “-are from another dimension, and they tried to kill you, but they’re cool now...” “Well, technically, only I tried to kill them.” Dark Pit corrected him. “...and more importantly, Taylor has a bunch of these weird things that are giving her crazy demonic powers.” “Yeah. She picked one up when she attacked us at the mall, and said, ‘Four down, two to go’.” Marie confirmed. “Hey, wait a sec.” Katherine realized, “Did it look anything like that thing from Shellendorf Institute? Y’know, the one we used to get Mario out of the statue?” “Yeah, now that you mention it, they looked exactly like it!” Luigi agreed. “Okay, so Taylor has 4 of these things, we have 1, and there’s apparently 6 in total.” “Exactly.” Callie agreed. “Which means there’s just one left.” “Yeah, and no doubt Taylor will be after ours before long.” Marcus acknowledged. “Well, she doesn’t know where our base is. I’m thinking we should focus on finding where she’s hiding out so we can take hers, and meanwhile we look for the final piece.” Mario recommended. “Good thinking. Still, we ought to keep our guard up. That girl wiped the floor with us with just 3 of those pieces, so I'd hate to see what she can do with 4.” Cappy pointed out. Marcus nodded, adding, "Yeah, and if she gets all of them, who knows what could happen?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> o


	6. Evil Unmasked part VI: massive metal man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a friendly reminder that I plan on streaming breath of the wild tonight, starting from 9-9:30 and going for 60-100 minutes.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCfZpGPn_iK4zuUavmBeMvfg

A couple of weeks after the incident with the fire, Pearl and Marina had finally recovered, albeit still slightly sore. Mario, Luigi, and Cappy were in their universe trying to get a vehicle called the Odyssey, while E. Gadd, Marina, and Sheldon were working on a new weapon. While Pit was telling Pearl about their recent fight with Krasue, Callie, Marie, Lauren, Marcus, Kat, and the S4 teleported into the base. “Hey, the captain told us to come over here. Something about a lead on Taylor.” Trent informed them. “Correct.” The Captain walked into the living room. “We’ve figured out that the artifacts Taylor’s been collecting might be connected to Majora.” “That makes sense.” Marcus nodded thoughtfully. “Honestly, we probably should’ve thought of that sooner.” “True, but hindsight is 2020, I suppose.” The captain chuckled lightly to himself. “Now, that means we should first search in the cave where agents 3, 4, and 8 found the word Majora written in Taylor’s ink.” “Ink? Is that what you guys call ichor?” Pit asked. “Yeah, stuff that leaks out when you get hurt.” Trent confirmed. “What’re we waiting for, then? Let’s go already!” Lauren started, interrupted by the building shaking on its foundations. “Oh great, what is it this chapter?” Dark pit questioned no one in particular. “Chapter?” Ethan looked at him, confused. “Get a load of him.” Pit nudged his twin’s shoulder. “Must be a third-waller.” “Come on, you two!” Callie yelled, the entire group rushing out of the front door. Immediately, they could see a massive humanoid statue made entirely of gold and bronze casting a shadow over their section of Inkopolis. Its size was incalculable, hundreds of feet tall as it moved closer to the city despite being miles from the border. “Holy… What is that thing?!” Pit screamed, terrified. “It needs to be stopped, that’s what.” The captain, despite being over a century old and leaning on his cane, still managed to evoke an air of authority. “Marina, Sheldon, E. Gadd, you three work double-time on whatever weapon it is you’ve been building. 3, 4, and 8, go back to the cave and find the other Majora pieces-we’re going to need every advantage we can get against that thing. Everyone else, see what you can do to slow it down.” “Got it. I’m thinking we should bring our piece too. Maybe it could give us an edge in case Taylor’s there waiting for us.” Marcus suggested. “Well, that does sound risky. Still, it could be for the best. You have my permission.” “Thanks, cap!” The three ran inside while the others left the base.

While the automaton continued its advance, Lauren, Marcus, and Katherine sprinted through the streets. Dozens of civilians were evacuating, some driving cars while most resorted to running away from the interloper. The three agents dodged and weaved through the traffic as cars swerved onto the curb in their drivers’ panic, occasionally stopping to ensure a lack of casualties. Marcus gestured down an alley between two apartment buildings, “Guys, c’mon, I think the cave is this way!” “What makes you say that?” Lauren questioned. “GPS.” He held up his phone, showing directions to the outskirts of the city. “Good answer.” They continued sprinting, the number of evacuating civilians becoming denser and more difficult to navigate. “This isn’t working.” Lauren started looking around frantically. “We need… Oh, there!” She ran over to a fire escape, gesturing the others to follow her up the ladder. Once they reached the top, they fired trails of yellow, green, and purple ink from their individual weapons so they could swim up to the roof in their cephalopod forms. “Come on, we should be able to find the cave easier now that we’re on higher ground.” Katherine ran over to the edge, looking over what parts of the city weren’t obscured by taller buildings. “Okay, I think it’s… that way!” she pointed to the forest outside the city borders. “Yeah, looks like it.” Mark agreed, glancing at his GPS. “Good work. Let’s go, team!” Lauren yelled, as they threw down a splatbomb each so they could jump off the building, submerging in their ink to dispel any fall damage. Jumping out in their humanoid forms, they sprinted into the forest. “Doesn’t look like there’s a signal out here.” Marcus pointed out. “No worries; we should be able to find the cave no problem now.” Kat assured him, gesturing to the device on her wrist. “Besides, our communicators will still work in case we need to call for backup.” Despite being miles away, they could still faintly hear the robot marching towards inkopolis.

“Y’know, now would be a really good time to have the power of flight.” Pit lamented as the squadron rushed towards the moving statue. “Yeah, no kidding. But who knows if Palutena and Viridi’s powers would even work here?” Dark Pit argued. “Who’re those?” Madison asked. “Wouldn’t you like to know?” “No, I asked because I thought it’d be funny.” “Sorry about him.” Pit maneuvered between the two, explaining, “They’re the goddesses who give us the ability to fly, since our wings don’t work naturally. Palutena’s the goddess of light, but Pittoo gets his flight from the nature goddess Viridi. Guess you’re not caught up on the continuity.” “Uh… right.” She ran ahead while Trent inquired, “Wait, if you’re brothers, why aren’t you working for the same goddess?” “What makes you think we’re brothers?” Dark Pit rebutted. “Nothing much, just the fact that you’re identical twins.” “Oh, that. See, I accidentally created Pittoo when I broke Pandora’s mirror of truth, which Medusa was using to create an endless supply of troops for Hades’s underworld army. In a way, he’s sort of like my son.” “I’m pretty sure that’s not how it works, pitstain. Unless you did some really weird stuff with that mirror before you broke it.” “Okay, well, I think I understood about half of what you just said.” “Trust me kid, it’s a long story.” Dark Pit informed him, “About 25 chapters or so.” “Uh… right.”

The forest outside Inkopolis was dense enough that it felt like night time despite being the middle of the day. The sounds of wildlife permeated the air with birdsong and crunching snow as three teenagers maneuvered the woods. Two of them had tentacle-hair that somewhat glowed in the dark, putting bright yellow and green spots on the trees and ground. “Seriously, we need to find that cave.” Marcus started fiddling with the Majora piece in his hand. “I got it!” He partially covered a tree with green ink from his splatling, turning into a squid to swim onto a sturdy branch. “You do that! We’ll see if we can find a bigger tree for a better vantage point!” Lauren called up. “Good luck with that!” He looked around, leaning backwards until his hand fell into a knothole. “Woah, hey!” He pulled his hand out, leaning in to investigate the orange glow. “What…?” He reached in, pulling something out that resembled the artifact he’d brought with him. “I don’t believe it. The final piece.” He barely heard Lauren yell from the ground a hundred feet away, “Guys, I found the cave!” “Oh! Right, uh, coming!” He pocketed both Majora pieces, deciding to keep his discovery to himself for the time being. On the ground, he used the tracks in the snow to find the other agents at the cave entrance. “Are we ready for this?” Kat wondered apprehensively. “You say that like we have a choice.” Lauren replied, as the ground continued to shake slightly. “Yeah, let’s do this already. The sooner we get this over with, the better.” Marcus walked inside, his tentacle-hair gradually growing brighter as he moved further from the sunlight. “No use putting it off.” Lauren grabbed Kat’s arm, leading her downwards.

Cappy flew off Mario’s head, looking around his hometown of Bonneton. The ground was permeated by a thick white fog, with black top-hat shaped houses dotting the townscape inhabited by small ghostly figures wearing tiny replicas of the hat-houses. “Are you sure? Maybe we left it in the Mushroom Kingdom.” Mario suggested. “Oh, yeah, now I remember!” Luigi reminded them, “We brought it to the Mushroom Kingdom, and then we went inside that mansion that took us to the other dimension.” “Oh, yeah, now I remember. Okay, so all we have to do is go back to that universe, tell them about the mistake, and then we can get back to finding the Odyssey.” “Wait, Mario.” Cappy corrected him. “Think about it: the transporter Sheldon gave us probably only has so much juice in it, and we don’t know how powerful the portal in the lab is. Really, our best bet is to find the Odyssey while staying in this dimension.” “Okay, but how should we do that? It’s not like we can just fly all the way to the Mushroom Kingdom from here.” Luigi pointed out. “Sure we can! Airships are a dime a dozen here; I’m sure we can find someone who’ll lend us one!” Mario suggested. “You always were a pollyanna.” “Come on, you two. We can borrow the family airship from my sister.” “Oh, yeah! I haven’t seen Tiara since the moon incident.” Mario remembered, he and Luigi following Cappy.

“Hey Kat, does this still remind you of the incident with lord Blackwood?” Lauren asked, climbing atop a stalagmite before jumping down, clusters of yellow spots jolting down on the stone walls. “Not really. I mean, our only light was a torch.” She covered two of the glowing spots on Marcus’s tentacle-hair with her palms. “What’re you doing?” He casually pushed her off. “Sorry, just trying to show you what it was like without glowing tentacles.” “That’s all well and good, but we’ve got more important things to worry about.” Lauren reminded them. The ground started shaking, causing the three to stumble backwards as the ground cracked open beneath them. “That statue must be in the city now!” Katherine yelled, falling onto the ground. “Can’t be; too sudden.” Lauren glanced over to see Katherine struggle to regain her balance, a stalactite shaking on the ceiling directly above her. “Kat! Watch out!” Before the rock could impale the octolling, Lauren grabbed her arms and pulled her out of the way so they both collapsed into a heap on the ground. “Thanks.” “Don’t mention it. Now let me up, will you?” “I could use some help!” Marcus was balancing with his feet on the edge of the floor as it inched away from the wall where he’d placed his palms, a hole gradually expanding directly below him. “Not again.” He muttered, trying to push himself away. The cave shook again, causing Marcus to lose his balance. Kat lunged forward, trying to grab him before he fell backwards. “No!” She barely made it to the crevice before Mark fell completely through, the glowing green spots on his tentacle-hair the only sign he was still there. “Get back from the edge!” Lauren grabbed her sides, pulling her back. “We have to find him, now!” “Wait a second, Kat.” Lauren turned her around, grabbing her shoulders. “We need to find the Majora pieces, remember?” “I… okay, I’ll go find Mark. You find the pieces. We can call each other for backup if we need it.” “Alright, that’ll work.” The teenagers split up, the cave ceasing its rumblings.

“Hey sis, I brought some visitors!” Cappy called inside as Mario opened the door. “What? Mario! Good to see you again.” A hat ghost, slightly smaller than Cappy, floated in the middle of a house with a black felt outline. A few tables and chairs stood off to the side while a chimney fire crackled in the back of the room. “This must be that brother you mentioned.” She floated to the taller one, trying to remember, “What’s your name again? Linguini? Louise? Lucy?” “Luigi, actually.” He answered as though he was used to people forgetting his name. “Oh, right. Sorry. Have you three been on any adventures lately?” “Actually, that’s what we need to talk about.” Cappy flew a few feet inside. “We need to borrow our airship to get to the Mushroom Kingdom. We left the Odyssey there, and now we can’t get back on foot.” “Oh, of course! I’d be glad to help. Except, how exactly did you get here without the Odyssey?” “It’s a long story involving ghosts, statues, and squids.” Mario explained. “Uh, that, um, okay then.” She paused before flying into the backyard. “So, I’m guessing this is your airship?” Mario looked up, following her out back with Luigi. The airship resembled the dozens of others dotting Bonneton, jet black and resembling a top hat. It had a white sail on top, attached by a golden yellow rod. “Mind if I come with you guys? It’d be nice to get to know you better, and visit the Mushroom Kingdom again. Besides, someone’s got to bring the ship back while you three are in the Odyssey.” “Yeah, of course! We’d be glad to have you with us!” Luigi affirmed. “Great!” Tiara floated through the door, the others following her inside. “Listen sis, I have to help these two with something, so I might not come back for a while.” “Oh. Okay, yeah, I understand.” She tried to hide her disappointment. “Hey, don’t worry. The three of us are professional adventurers; your brother will come back just fine before you know it.” Mario assured her. “Thanks. Now, let’s get going already!” She flew over to the controls, maneuvering the ship into the sky.

Marcus screamed as he fell down the cavern, until he lost his breath after a few seconds. His bioluminescence allowed him to see a stalagmite directly below him, its sharp tip growing closer to impaling him. Mark maneuvered himself so his limbs were stretched downwards while arching his back, allowing him to perch on the stalagmite with his stomach inches above it. “Okay. Okay, just gotta-” He tried to step off the stone formation, only to lose his footing and fall onto the ground 20 feet below, his leg scraping against the naturally-formed pillar while bending at an unnatural angle. Marcus screamed in pain, looking down at the inch-wide line of green ink-blood below his knee. “Great, just great.” He muttered, trying to distract himself from the stinging cut while he looked for something to cover the ink-blood. Failing that, he tried to dial his communicator. “How… how isn’t there a signal?” He looked upwards, the cave pitch-black aside from the faint emerald glow surrounding him. “Okay. There’s gotta be some way back up.” The inkling tried to stand up, using the stalagmite as leverage before collapsing back to the ground from his injury. “No… Somebody!” He called upwards into the cave. “Please, help me! Anybody!” “Hiya, Mark. Didn’t expect to meet you here.” A voice preceded a girl with glowing purple tentacle-hair exposing a half-rotted face and a necklace adorned with four multicolored artifacts. “Anybody but her! I should’ve been more specific!” "Y'know Marcus, if I didn't know any better I'd say you didn't want to see me." "Oh really? What ever gave you that idea?" He snarled, still struggling to stand up. "Look, I know you have something I've been looking for. I’ll help you out of here, but first you have to tell me where your team’s base is.” “No way. Even if I did trust you, I’d never help you find what you’re after.” “Oh Marky.” She started to giggle. “You’re adorable when you think you have a choice.” She gestured towards herself, a radiant orange line attaching her hand to Marcus’s torn leg. He screamed as he was dragged along the ground, Taylor grabbing onto his collar. “How’s this for a deal: You’re going to tell me where your friends are hiding out, or I’ll use you as a test subject for my new powers.” “Never.” He breathed through the pain. “Oh, Marcus.” She sounded almost disappointed despite her sadistic grin. “Why do you have to make things so hard?” She flung him to the side, audibly landing on the stone cave floor. Marcus barely had enough breath to scream as his leg flared in pain, staining the ground near him green. Taylor approached him, supporting his head with one hand while leaning in close enough that he could see individual scars and burn marks on her face tinted green and purple. “Face it, Mark: I’m in control. I’ve always been in control.” She started to laugh quietly to herself. “You know, this almost reminds me of our first kiss. Remember that, Marky?” “Go...to...hell.” He spat, a bit of lime ink spraying out of his mouth with every syllable. “Oh come on, you know you enjoyed it.” A flash of light illuminated their entire section of the cavern for a second, followed by a small humanoid figure engulfed in shadow. “What the-? Hey! Get away from him!” A high-pitched male voice commanded, the figure emerging from the darkness to jump-kick Taylor and force her off of Marcus. He was slightly shorter than Mark, clad in a green outfit consisting of a tunic and pointed hat. "You okay, kid?" The child took a bottle filled with red liquid out of a brown satchel on his back. "I...what? Kid?" Marcus stared at the stranger, who looked no older than 12, as he poured the contents of the bottle on his leg. The pain numbed as the cut narrowed, skin reappearing until his wound completely healed. "Wow. Thanks, man." "Excuse me green team, but aren't you two forgetting someone?" Taylor stood up, unfolding her inkbrush and slamming it onto the ground hard enough to create a crack on the ground that shook the pair to the ground. "Friend of yours?" Before Marcus could answer, a yellow glow revealed a tunnel Marcus hadn't seen on the side of the cavern as Lauren and Katherine entered the wide-open space, having fallen down a nearby crevice. "Mark!" Kat ran over, helping Marcus to his feet before hugging him. "You okay, bro?" "Get off of me. Now." He snarled, pushing her off. "Mark? Is something wrong? Who's this guy?" "Marcus, what's going on with you?" Lauren asked apprehensively. "Shut up!" He screamed, his face flushed lime green. "You abandoned us, just because you couldn't handle being mind-controlled! You left and ran back home, because you're just a selfish little coward!" He turned to Katherine, yelling in her face, "And you! Don't touch me!" He raised his hand, smacking Kat's face hard enough to send her a few feet back. "What the hell, Mark?! She's your sister!" "Sister? Why the hell would I want her for a sister?" Kat jumped on Marcus, knocking him to the ground before punching him in the face. "You two, stop fighting!" Lauren tried to pull Katherine and Marcus off each other. "This is exactly what Taylor wants! It's the Majora piece; it must be corrupting you!" "Wait a second; Majora?" The human yelled, horrified. "Come on, give me the piece. Otherwise, your friends will kill each other before I get the chance." Taylor offered. "No way. If this thing's got anything to do with Majora, it can't be good." The stranger declared. Lauren looked over where Mark and Kat were biting and clawing at each other, not hesitating to run over and pull the Majora piece out of the inkling's pocket. "You want it? Here, take it!" She threw it at Taylor, who created an orange line between her hand and the object to drag it to herself. "Thanks, um, sorry, who're you?" "Lauren, remember? You thought I was dating Marcus even though I'm 16 and he's 14?" "Yeah, sorry, doesn't ring a bell. But more Importantly, I've got what I wanted." She teleported away in a flash of orange light. "You-you idiot! Do you have any idea what you've done?!" The newcomer screamed. "Yeah, I saved my friends from each other. Who even are you, anyway?" "What just happened? Kat?" Marcus stood up, backing away a few inches. "Kat, I-I'm sorry! I don't know why I said any of that; of course I want you for a sister!" He flinched in surprise when Katherine embraced him. "What're you-" "It's okay, Marcus." "N-no it isn't. I hit you. That's not okay." "It wasn't you, it was the piece." "I think you mean the pieces." Lauren knelt down, picking up something that'd fallen out of Mark's pocket when she'd reached into it. "What is this?" She asked, voice dripping with anger. "You had the last piece, and you didn't tell us?! If Taylor had found this, we'd all be done for!" "I-I'm so sorry! I didn't think it would do that to me. I thought Taylor wouldn't know. I didn't think there was enough time to bring it back to the base." "Wait a second, if she missed a piece, then we might still have a chance." The human informed them. "I'm sorry, but who even are you?" Lauren asked, still slightly angry. "Name's Link, but that's not important right now." Their communicators started beeping, Marcus realizing, "Of course! Taylor must've been blocking my signal. Yeah, Sheldon?" "The robot has made it inside Inkopolis! We need two of you to pilot the new weapons; they might be the only way to stop that thing." "Okay, we'll be right over." Katherine responded, turning off the communicator. "The two of us will pilot the new weapons. Lauren, you try to help the others. Kid, I'll give you a transporter to teleport out of here." Katherine instructed. "Alright, thanks." He caught the device after she threw it, letting her show him the code to teleport to the empty living room in the base along with the other three. "You two go to the lab. I'll go outside. Kid, you stay here." "No, wait, he kicked Taylor and healed a really nasty cut. I think he can help." Link nodded, Lauren relenting, "Okay, he can come." The group split up. "Oh, good, you made it! Quick, get in!" Marina gestured to two cylindrical vehicles, one black and white while the other was grey and white. One had pedals on the side, a simplistic steering wheel, and an empty tube attached to the back while the other had an orange tip, similar pedals and steering wheel, and two smaller empty canisters. "Thanks, guys." Marcus jumped in the longer vehicle, Katherine unhesitatingly accepting the taller one with a single large tube. The canisters on the vehicles filled up with ink of their respective colors, while the white and grey sections turned green and purple. "Woah… that felt weird." Katherine shook her head. "Yeah, no kidding." Marcus blinked rapidly. "Come on, let's go already!" E. Gadd pressed a button on the corner of the wall, causing the back wall to rise until it was perpendicular with the outside of the house. "I knew it was a good idea to install that." Marina smiled as the teenagers left through the opening.

"Alright, Link, got anything up your sleeve to fight that thing?" "Oh, I think this might help." He put a gray mask on his face, with a long rectangular nose in the middle and sunken-in eye sockets. Link screamed in pain, growing exponentially for a few seconds until he matched the robot in height. "Oh. Okay, yeah, that'll help." Lauren gaped as two small vehicles sped past her. "Sheldon, how do we use these things?” Marcus yelled into his communicator, trying to control the vehicle at the same time. “Both of you, press the big gold button on the front of your vehicles. That way, your Inkstriker will merge with Katherine’s Splat Buggy into the KartMech.” “Seriously?” “We didn’t have time for names.” “Fair enough.” He yelled a few feet over, “Big gold button!” She nodded, as both of them did as Sheldon instructed.

Pit fired a volley of spectral arrows into the robot’s leg, eliciting no observable response. “Okay, does anyone have something that can stop this thing?” A scream echoed through the air, gradually growing louder and deeper until a massive humanoid figure rose from the buildings, wearing a green tunic and gray mask. Pit blinked, the entire group standing frozen as the automaton took a brief step back, apparently just as surprised as they were. “Okay, does anyone have a large bag of free food?” He looked around for a few seconds. “Darn it.” The human took a sword out of a sheath strapped between his back and a blue shield emblazoned with a red bird design. He swung the sword down at the robot’s shoulder, cracking it while two nearby vehicles split apart, their individual components floating in the air and attaching to each other until a twenty-foot humanoid machine stood on the street.

“Woah! What just happened?” Katherine yelled, reeling in surprise. “I think we’re riding a mecha.” Mark looked down from the window, realizing they were in the head of a green, purple, and black machine. “Yep. definitely a mecha.” He started to grin while Katherine practically shook with excitement. “Alright, let’s do this!” She pressed a blue button on the sparse dashboard, causing the new weapon to levitate in the air, propelled by plumes of white-hot fire emerging from its soles. They leaned backwards in surprise, the mecha lurching back. "Hey… Kat, raise your left hand." "Uh, alright." They raised their left hands, the robot mimicking their movements. "Of course; it's motion-controlled! Let's do this!" She yelled, both leaning forward to move the KartMech through the air. It ascended as a result of Katherine pressing down on the button, eventually reaching the heads of the two giants. The automaton kicked Link in the shin, speaking in a deafening, synthetic voice, “I am Talos, guardian of Crete. You must be stopped for intruding on my land.” “Hate to break it to you, but this isn’t Crete.” Link took his shield off his back to block a punch. “You lie. You are a coward who must be eliminated.” Marcus pressed a red button on his side of the KartMech, causing it to launch a salvo of missiles from its shoulders that impacted Talos’s face and neck. “Woah! No wonder it took so long to build this thing! It’s awesome!” “Dodge!” Katherine yelled, leaning to the right while Marcus leaned left. The KartMech stood immobile as a bronze fist as big as itself collided with it, forcing the pilots to desperately struggle to regain the machine’s balance. “Okay, we need to synch up if we’re going to beat that thing.” Katherine responded, “Alright, follow my lead.”

The three engineers ducked out of the lab as the portal grew, bursting apart as an air balloon emerged. It had a golden spherical top the same size as the red cylindrical vehicle with a red brim, ascending through the opening in the lab. “Huh. I was wondering how we’d- Mama mia! Look at that!” Luigi pointed out the window, where a giant was fighting a robot while a humanoid the size of the odyssey flew towards them. “Luigi, steer the ship! Mario, you’re on weapons!” Cappy instructed the brothers. The Odyssey fired a cannon from a white section on the bottom, striking Talos’s shoulder while Link sliced into the other. Talos stepped back, grabbing Link’s shoulders in an attempt to push him to the ground. The KartMech appeared between them, kicking at Talos’s hand while Link stabbed into its chest. The machine grabbed the sword by its hilt, pulling it out and swinging it at Link’s face. The mask broke in half, the boy instantly shrinking and falling through the air onto the Odyssey’s rim. “”Hey, kid, you alright?” Mario helped him to his feet. “No! Without the giant’s mask, I’m useless against that thing!” “Introductions later. Come inside!” He dragged the child into the Odyssey, going back to the weapon controls to fire more cannonballs at Talos. “We need some way to-over there!” Kat pointed at the massive hole and exposed wires where Talos had been stabbed. “Let’s go inside!” “Not bad.” Mark agreed. They maneuvered inside Talos, firing missiles into the forest of multicolored wires and ascending into its head. “Hey, what’s going on?” Callie stared as Talos froze, completely immobile as the KartMech exploded from its eye. “Maybe he just needed some rewiring!” Katherine yelled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> r
> 
> So, I found this on a Google Doc that I'm pretty sure I didn't create. It almost seems like some sort of hex. I'm just going to leave it here and go do my decimal homework.
> 
> 68 74 74 70 73 3a 2f 2f 77 77 77 2e 64 65 76 69 61 6e 74 61 72 74 2e 63 6f 6d 2f 74 61 6d 61 72 69 6e 66 72 6f 67 2f 61 72 74 2f 46 69 6e 61 6c 2d 4d 61 74 63 68 2d 53 70 6c 61 74 2d 4a 61 6d 2d 56 53 2d 54 6f 78 69 6e 6b 2d 50 61 67 65 2d 31 34 2d 37 34 38 36 31 33 32 38 36


	7. Evil Unmasked part VII: the witch of the walking house

The KartMech landed on the ground, stumbling forward a few steps before separating into pieces that reconstituted into a pair of smaller cars. “Okay, we definitely need to work on the landing.” Katherine noted, the two drivers getting back out onto the ground while the Odyssey landed nearby. “Guys!” Link ran out of the airship. “Good work on beating that-” Callie ran over, lifting him off the ground and shaking him excitedly. “It’s so cute! Marie can we keep it? Can we can we can we-?” “Gah not again! Put me down you vixen!” “Callie, put the kid down. You don’t know where he’s been.” Marie instructed her cousin firmly, as Link dropped back down. “Thank you. Now if you’ll excuse me, we need to discuss how your friend here-” He pointed at Marcus. “-nearly unleashed Majora on your world.” “Yeah, I was wondering about that too.” Lauren added, “What were you thinking? Why would you bring both the other pieces when you knew there was a possibility we might run into Taylor? Do you have any idea how risky that was?” “Look, I didn’t think she’d know I had two pieces. Still, I should’ve told you guys. That one’s on me.” “Alright, we can worry about that later.” Lauren sighed, continuing, “Link, you seem like you know something about this ‘Majora’. We could really use some info, and if you could turn into a giant again...” “Sorry, but the Giant’s mask got broken by that thing.” He took the halves of the mask out of his satchel, gesturing at the paralyzed Talos. “As far as I know, the only one was located in the Stone Tower temple at the dead valley of Ikana, so it’s not like I can just get a spare. As for Majora, yeah. I fought that thing a few months ago.” “Hold it. You mean Majora is a living thing?” Pit asked. “Yeah, the most powerful demonic force I’ve ever come across.” Link explained, “According to my research, Majora was a demon that was sealed in a mask by a demigod called the Fierce Deity millenia before the founding of my home kingdom, Hyrule. It was eventually found by some guy who called himself the Happy Mask Salesman, but it got stolen by a friend of mine, the Skull Kid. Majora possessed him through the mask and I had to chase him into a parallel world called Termina.” “Okay, but more importantly, how did you stop it? That’d be kind of nice to know.” Dark Pit inquired. “With this.” He pulled a mask with gray hair and red and blue markings around its eye sockets out of his bag. “It’s a mask that contains the spirit of the Fierce Deity. I earned it by completing a series of trials, and used it to destroy Majora before it could bring the moon down on Termina.” “Well, why don’t we just take that mask and use it to destroy our Majora piece so Taylor can’t finish assembling them?” Marcus suggested. “No!” Link screamed, hastily putting the artifact back. “The Fierce Deity’s mask is the most dangerous weapon in my arsenal. Last time I put it on, I became the Fierce Deity and barely managed to control myself enough to take it off. I only carry it so I can make sure it never falls into the wrong hands. As for destroying the piece, it’s made with incredibly powerful dark magic. The happy mask salesman was a skilled sorcerer, and even he was only able to split it into six pieces and scatter them after Majora’s power started to resurface.” “Okay, so what’s the plan now?” Luigi responded. “I saw for myself how powerful Taylor was with just 3 of those things. How are we supposed to beat her with 5?” “Well, first off, we need to take the last Majora piece back to the base.” Ethan recommended. “If it couldn’t be destroyed by magic, maybe we could use technology.” Link nodded. “Yeah, maybe. I mean, it’s really the best option we’ve got.” "Well, in any case, it'll be nice to have someone younger than me on the team." Marcus put his arm around Link's shoulder. "Uh, actually, I'm 19." He took his arm off, startled. "What? How in the shish-kebob is that even possible?" "Finally!" Pearl celebrated. "A fellow midget!" "Uh, no. I'm stuck in the body of my past self from 7 years ago. It's a long story involving time travel, a magic ocarina, and some all-powerful triangles." their communicators started beeping until answered. “Guys, there’s been another monster sighting.” Marina informed them through the devices. “What? Already? We just took down the robot!” Katherine yelled. "Where is it, anyway?" "There've been sightings of a walking house in Melani county." "Wait, Melani? Mark, isn't that where you grew up?" Katherine remembered. "Yeah!" The boy grinned. "Oh man, I don't believe it. Hey, do you think I could go? I know I screwed up, but I'll accept any other punishment." Marie considered his offer. "Okay. I guess it couldn't hurt to have someone intimately familiar with the town. But once this is all over, you're cleaning the entire base. I'll let you take breaks for sleeping, eating, and your day job, but you'll only be able to go on missions if absolutely necessary." "Fair enough! C'mon, we can take the KartMech and-" "-Sorry, kiddo." Sheldon interrupted. "The Inkstriker and Splat Buggy were a rush job. We didn't have time to beta test them, so they might be dangerously unstable. I want them brought back immediately to be properly finished." "Alright, me and my cousin will bring them back." Callie looked up from the device. "Mark, give me the Majora piece; we need to bring it to the base." He nodded, tossing the artifact over like a set of car keys. "Okay, we can go in the Odyssey. It's got plenty of room for everyone, and we'll be there in no time." Mario recommended. "Sorry, man, but we probably shouldn't introduce too much interdimensional stuff all at once to the smaller towns." Trent argued. “We’re trying not to cause panic.” “He’s got a point.” Pit agreed. “Okay, so most of us will take the new weapons and final Majora piece back to the lab. Mark, Lauren, Kat, you three go to Melani county.” Cappy summarised. “Just one problem: We don’t have any teleport beacons in Melani.” Marcus realized. “Oh! But we do have one in Innsmouth!” Lauren piped up. “The three of us can go and get Eric to drive us down to Melani county, plus he can help us fight the walking house!” “Alright, sounds like a good plan.” Marcus agreed. “Honestly doesn’t even feel weird anymore.” Katherine added.

Eric walked inside his house, propping his roller on the wall near the front door. “Oh man.” He sat on a 3-seat green couch, still catching his breath after the recent excursion. “That was awesome.” He grinned, lost in his thoughts for a few minutes until a knock on his front door forced him back to reality. “Coming!” The second he opened it, he stepped back in surprise. “Hi Eric!” Lauren greeted him. “Just what’re you three doing here?” He absently waved them inside. “Sorry, but we need your help with something. It’s agent work.” Katherine explained. “Okay, and you two are...” he waved his hand in a circle. “Seriously, dude? We met a couple months ago.” Marcus interjected. “We fought together multiple times.” “Oh, right, sorry. There were just so many of us when we met, it was kind of hard to keep track of everyone.” “No argument here. Anyway, we need a ride to Melani county.” “Come again?” “There’ve been some sightings of a walking house down there. Since we don’t have any teleport beacons in the town, we need someone to drive us.” Katherine explained. Eric sighed, rubbing his forehead. “Okay, well, I’ll have to let the others know. Nate’s working weekend overtime at the cafe, so I’ve been doing turf wars with the blue team to substitute.” While he dialed his phone, Lauren mentioned, “Thanks, Eric. This whole thing is really impor-” He held up his finger as the phone started ringing. “Hey, Tyler. Listen, I’m not gonna be able to do turf wars for a few hours. Your Inkopolis friends need a ride to Melani county; something about a walking house. Yeah, I don’t get it either. Alright, thanks.” He hung up the phone, announcing, “We’re good to go, guys.” “Awesome! Kat, maybe we could introduce you to my parents. I mean, now that we’re technically official siblings...” “Don’t forget, our priority is the monster. We can focus on family afterwards if there’s time.” Lauren reminded him. “Okay, fair enough. Still, it would be nice to meet my adopted parents. Good thing we’re bringing that teleport beacon with us.” “Good thinking. That way, you three won’t need me every time agent work comes up down there. Now come on, the car’s not gonna drive itself. Yet.”

“Okay, lucky for us Melani county is south of Innsmouth, which is south of Inkopolis, meaning that we’ve already given ourselves a head start.” Katherine looked up from the map on her phone as the car left the town borders. “Thank goodness for global positioning technology and basic geography.” “Hey, Kat, Lauren, about what happened in the cave...” Marcus started, sitting next to the octoling in the backseat, “I’m… I’m just really sorry. I mean, I know it was Majora controlling me, but it was only controlling me in the first place because of a decision I made, and I still hurt both of you. I mean, Lauren, you weren’t selfish or a coward. You had to leave because of what the Insurgency did to you. Katherine, I-I’m so sorry I hit you. You’ve been a great sister, and you didn’t deserve any of that. At the time, all I could see was this empty void full of fire, but, I dunno, I still had a sense of what was going on.” “It’s fine, Marcus.” Lauren replied from directly in front of him. “Thanks to Tartar and the Chaos Insurgency, I know first-hand what it’s like to be under something else’s control.” “Yeah, and besides, you’re not going to do something like that again, are you?” Katherine asked sternly. “I-no, of course not. Thanks to me, Taylor’s one step closer to assembling Majora.” “Hey, Mark, when you and Taylor were dating, did she ever…y’know...” Kat trailed off, rubbing her cheek where Marcus had struck her. “What? Oh. Yeah, uh, a few times. Of course, she’d always find some way to convince me it was my fault, or that I deserved it.” “Look buddy, I don’t know you that well, but you seem like a good kid who’s made some honest mistakes.” Eric kept his eyes on the road, but his tone was plenty sincere. “You definitely didn’t deserve whatever this Taylor girl did to you, and it sure as hell wasn’t your fault.” “Thanks.” He muttered, head down. “C’mere.” Katherine put her arm around his shoulders, gently pushing until her slightly younger brother was leaning against her shoulder. “You know it’s going to take more than a little slap to really hurt me.” “I wonder how my old friends are doing.” He mused, seemingly out of left field. “Oh? You mean Whinter and Clementine, right?” Kat remembered, letting him sit up. “Yeah, I haven’t contacted them in a while now. I wonder if they even remember me. Maybe they hate me because I haven’t talked to them in so long.” He stared out of the window. “Well, me and Tyler hit it off pretty well, and we were out of contact for a lot longer. I’m sure it’ll be fine, assuming you even do see them on this mission. And besides, you’ve still got us.” “Hey, these friends of yours-did they help you in any way with your girlfriend?” Eric asked. “Yeah. I remember they both tried to convince me to break up with her, but I didn’t listen to them at the time. Then, after I found out about her cheating on me, they made sure I was alright before I moved here." They continued driving in silence for a few hours, Katherine reading an ebook on her phone, until she blurted out, "Hey Lauren, what's a hickey? Is that some sort of inkling thing?" The yellow-haired inkling grinned wide enough to bare her fangs. “Why don’t you lean over and I’ll show you?” “No.” Eric pushed the octoling’s head back without taking his focus off driving. “I need more normal friends.” Marcus chuckled. “Speaking of which, question for you, Mark.” “What? It’s not a hickey question, is it?” He continued grinning. “No. I’m just curious if Melani county has any history, like, how was it founded? “Oh, yeah, I think I remember some of it from history class. Long story short, an inkling soldier named May Pike befriended an octoling soldier-Lacey Melani-when they both had to work together to escape an octarian death trap during the great turf war-I don’t really remember all the details, but that’s the gist. Anyway, after that, they left in the hopes they could escape the war. Later on, Pike founded a county and named it after her friend.” “Really? So, you’re saying they both betrayed their armies?” Katherine replied. “Well, no one really knows the details of how they became friends since our only real source is what’s left of Pike’s personal notes, plus they probably figured one soldier going AWOL on either side wouldn’t make a difference either way.” “Okay, I guess that’s understandable.” “Here’s our destination, guys.” Eric gestured to a sign saying ‘Welcome to Melani county’. “So, where am I parking?” Marcus looked around at the one- and two-story houses lining the street. “I was thinking we could stop at 19 Gill street, my old home. It’s in the middle of town, so it should give us a good starting point.” “Alright, but remember: we’re here for the mission. We can save the family reunion for afterwards.” Lauren reminded him. "Yeah, yeah, I know. I just really want Kat to meet her parents." "Hey, it's not like this is our last chance. Remember, we've still got the beacon." "You're right. I shouldn't- oh hey! Stop right here!" "What? Why?" Eric slammed the brakes, abruptly stopping the car in front of an ice cream stand. "Seriously? You made me stop for this?" He yelled as Mark jumped out of the car. "What's with him?" Kat wondered aloud, getting out as well. By the time she found him, Marcus was sitting at a table with two other inklings; a girl with orange hair and a boy with blue hair. “So, mind explaining why you didn’t return any of our calls for months on end?” the girl was asking, her expression a strange mix of indignance and happiness. “Yeah, sorry. My phone got busted during a mission-” “Wait, mission?” The boy piped up, sitting bolt upright. “You mean-are you an agent?” “Yeah, agent 4.” “I’m guessing you two are Whinter and Clementine?” Katherine spoke up behind him. “Oh! Yeah, guys, this is Katherine.” He stood up, gently pushing her closer to the table. “So, are you an agent too?” Whinter pressed. “Yeah, agent 8. I’m also, err, actually, do you mind if I tell them?” “Hey, these two were my best friends before I moved out. Of course you can tell them.” “Oh, well in that case, I’m Mark’s adopted sister.” “No kidding? How exactly did that happen?” Clementine leaned forward, curious. “Well, after I moved to inkopolis, we realized I didn’t have anywhere to stay, so I moved in with Marcus since our other friend Lauren is broke as all get-out. I guess at some point, we started thinking of each other as siblings.” “Hey, Marcus!” Eric pulled him out of the chair by his arm, Lauren nearby. “What’re you doing with these two?” “Uh, we were actually on a date.” Whinter explained, wrapping his arm around Clementine as she smiled warmly. “Of course, you guys are kind of third-wheeling. And now there’s six wheels. It’s like some sort of abomination, like two vehicles meshed into one. Some sort of hybrid monster car, or one of those six-wheeled monster trucks.” “Well, I never fell for him for his poetry.” Clementine snarked, scratching the back of his tentacle-hair. “Yeah, well, sorry, but we need to talk with your friend here.” Eric didn’t wait for a response before dragging Mark over to the other side of the cluster of tables, surrounded by inklings sitting at tables. “Look man, I get that it’s exciting being back in your old town and meeting your old friends again, but we need to focus on finding and destroying that monster.” “Yeah, you’re right. Sorry, it’s just… almost overwhelming, even though it’s only been a few months.” “I guess that’s fair, but we need to focus on our priorities.” “You’re right. Let’s get looking for that house.” The ground started shaking, as though something massive were moving in their direction, while a few cars swerved in the road nearby. A pair of legs as thick as tree trunks turned the corner on three-clawed feet, supporting a small wooden house twenty feet above the ground. “Not one for subtlety, is it?” Marcus shot a blast of plasma at the house, causing it to take a step back. A high-pitched cackle sounded from the house, followed by a beam of yellow light. Marcus pushed Eric out of the way, launching them both next to his old friends’ table. “Guys, get out of here, now!” Mark yelled, standing up while the house fired another blast at the ice cream stand, causing it to explode while the employees barely had enough time to evacuate. The group of six ran over to the pile of rubble, helping the dozen or so civilians who’d collapsed in the destruction. “Okay, I think that’s everyone.” Clementine looked around to confirm. “Good. Uh, mind if we bum a ride with you guys?” “Yeah, come on.” “Wait, these guys are just civilians.” Eric argued. “Pot...” Marcus gestured to Eric, then to Clementine and Whinter. “...meet kettle.” “He’s got a point. Besides, these two just helped us, and it’s not like we can just abandon them anyway.” “Thanks, uh…” Clementine trailed off. “Lauren-agent 3.” “Right, right.” They rushed over to the agents’ car, returning to their previous positions while Whinter sat in the middle of the backseat. “Doesn’t look like there’s enough room here for all of us. Sorry, but someone’s gonna have to sit on someone else’s lap.” Marcus pointed out. “Oh, well, I mean, twist my arm.” Clementine muttered, climbing over to her boyfriend while Eric slammed on the gas pedal. “Woah, dude, seat belts!” Whinter yelled, the G-force pushing him between his girlfriend and the seat. “We’re driving past the speed limit to escape a walking shack shooting lasers. Road safety isn’t exactly our biggest concern right now.” Eric snapped, glancing at the rearview mirror to see the creature directly behind them. “And it’s following us. Of course.” He swerved to the other side of the road to avoid a blast, half of the car elevated onto the sidewalk. He had to swerve the vehicle between lanes to avoid the blasts of light and heat, causing it to rapidly rock back and forth. “I’m starting to think we might need a new strategy.” Lauren struggled to speak through the shaking. “Yeah, and then a bag.” Marcus muttered, trying to keep his face from turning as green as his tentacle-hair. “Here!” Eric swerved the car around a corner, looking in the overhead mirror to see the legged hut turning a corner behind them, apparently no longer pursuing them. “Oh man… that was close.” Eric leaned back in his seat, letting the car slow down a little while he gestured over his shoulder. “We’re dropping you two off at whichever of your homes is closer, and then the four of us are going to fight off that freak. Unless you’d rather help us?” “Oh, no, we’re fine.” Whinter confirmed, looking around to make sure the house had left. “So, is this what it’s always like for you guys?” Clementine inquired, absently entwining her fingers with Whinter’s. “Yeah, pretty much.” Marcus started, “Using a combination of strength, guile, and dumb luck, we protect everyone from all sorts of threats. We’re basically the heroes of Inkopolis.” The ground started shaking, harder than the last time, as the fowl-legged hut turned a corner directly in front of the group. “Woah woah woah!” Eric spun the wheel, desperately turning the car in the opposite direction. One of the hut’s massive feet hooked its talons around the car, lifting it into the air to slam into the pavement, sending shockwaves through the passengers before tossing it onto the ground where it broke apart, scattering them in the middle of the street amongst the metal remains. The hut ran off, the voice from earlier calling, “Now you children will know to fear the name Baba Yaga!” “Gah… is everyone alright?” Whinter looked around as the others started to get up, Eric pulling his shirt up over his chin after smashing it into the steering wheel. He could see Clementine lying still on her stomach, a bright orange spot on her back. “Clem! No!” He ran over to her with the agents, seeing a large, jagged triangular piece of the car’s roof next to her covered with orange ink-blood. Her back was partially gouged, bleeding onto the street. “No, no, this-this can’t be happening.” Whinter sobbed, trying to help Clementine to her feet. “Hold on, I think this might help.” Marcus pulled a bottle of red liquid out of his pocket, pouring the entirety of the contents onto Clementine’s back. She shuddered, the hole in her back shrinking to half its size. Whinter took off his shirt, draping it over the wound as a makeshift bandage. It was stained orange, and slightly entered the wound in the center. Clementine whimpered in pain, having slightly regained consciousness. “H...u...r...t...s...” Whinter lifted her to her feet, putting his arms around her back while her legs shook. “I know, I know, ju-just hang in there. It’s go-going to be fine.” “Come on, I think I saw a hospital while we were driving.” Katherine gestured around a corner a few hundred feet away. “Good. Mark, any more red stuff?” Eric gurgled, his mouth still dripping yellow ink-blood. “Uh, sorry, man. That was the only one I had.” “I’ve got some medical supplies. The rest of you, get Clementine to the hospital.” Katherine instructed, getting out a strip of gauze while Lauren and Marcus helped Whinter drag his girlfriend.

The hospital room was stifling, despite the group of three sitting around the bed. An orange-haired inkling lay unconscious on her stomach, her back covered in bandages. A machine steadily beeped, hooked up to her through dozens of wires. “How’s she doing?” Eric walked into the room, rubbing his chin where he’d received stitches, followed by Katherine. “She’s in a coma. They don’t know how long it’ll take, but she’ll probably recover. It could take anywhere from a couple weeks to half a year.” Whinter explained blankly, hand placed over hers. “Oh. Well, at least she’ll survive. That’s what’s important.” Eric turned to Katherine while the blue-haired boy only nodded in response. “Thanks for helping me with getting the stitches.” “Yeah, I’ve only got so much supplies on me. Plus, we know the squid sisters and Off The Hook, so the bills shouldn’t be a problem.” “Come on, we need to get back to taking down that monster.” Lauren stood up. “I’m coming too.” Whinter responded bluntly. “No way. You’re a civilian.” “That thing hurt my girlfriend. I need to-” “Sorry, but she’s right.” Marcus interrupted him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “You should stay here and keep Clementine company.” “I...okay. It’s just, I feel like I’m losing control. Is this what it was like when you found out Taylor was cheating on you?” “Feeling like everything you knew is wrong? Yeah, kind of. But trust me, it’ll get better. Not quickly, but it will.” “Thanks.”

The hut continued running through the streets, blasts of magic periodically hitting houses and parked cars, until the bottom of the floor was struck by a bolt of plasma from Marcus’s splatling. The house paused in its steps while Eric pushed his roller towards it, stopping in time to spin the heavy weapon into both legs. The shack stumbled backwards, falling onto its knees. “Guys! Look! There’s someone on the porch!” Lauren pointed at the front of the lowered house, bordered by a fence adorned with skulls, where an old woman with gray hair stretching down to her waist held a club-like pestle as tall as herself, standing in a giant bowl-like mortar. “That must be Baba Yaga!” Katherine called out,using her dualies to create a path of purple ink. She swam through it in her octopus form while Eric used his roller to vault onto Baba Yaga’s fence. She held up the pestle, glowing yellow on one end, until Kat jumped out in her humanoid form to toss her dagger into the witch’s shoulder. She dropped the pestle, giving Eric time to lift himself over the fence while Katherine used her remaining dagger as a handhold. Lauren shifted into squid form, wrapping her two longest tentacles around Marcus’s neck while he fired his splatling onto the ground to launch them both next to the other two. “You dare invade my home? I will grind your bones unto dust!” Baba Yaga twirled her pestle with surprising dexterity for her age, firing a blast of magic that the group managed to roll under. Lauren stood up, swinging her splattershot into the sorceress’s face before Eric slammed his roller into her chest, followed up by Kat pulling her dagger out of the witch’s shoulder to slash at her arms, causing the pestle to fall to the wooden floor. Marcus jumped, kicking Baba Yaga to the ground and firing plasma point-blank at her chest. “Consider this your eviction notice!” “Nice work, kid. Guess that plan of yours worked.” Eric congratulated. “Yeah, I figured it was the least I could do considering if I hadn’t stopped to talk, Clementine never would’ve gotten hurt.” Lauren’s communicator started beeping. “Callie? What is it?” “You guys need to get back right now! Taylor broke in; she has the sixth piece!” “What?! Okay, we’ll be right over.” “Piece? Piece of what?” “Eric, it’s a long story. Teleport to Innsmouth county and gather the blue team for backup.” “Understood.” They all activated their transporters, preparing for battle.

Taylor teleported into the cave, grinning. She placed the six pieces onto the stone slab, arranged into a complete whole. It was a heart-shaped mask, painted blue and red with bulging orange eyes, 2 spikes on top, and 4 more on each side. “I’m done, my lord. Now there’s just one thing left to do.” She knelt over the slab, barely registering the names etched into it. Orange liquid, more viscous than water but more liquid than ink, dripped out of the scars on the mutilated side of her face in rivulets, pooling around the mask. The liquid moved on its own accord between the six pieces, welding them together. The mask floated in the air, a cluster of rope-like tentacles sprouting from the back while its eyes glowed orange. It spoke in the same eldritch, unfathomably ancient voice from her mind, “Are you ready, child?” “Yes, my lord.” “Good.” It stretched its tentacles, latching onto her face. Taylor screamed in pain and laughed in joy as the mask fused to her. They both spoke with two voices and one mind.

“We are Majora.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a


	8. Evil Unmasked part VIII: the mask of darkness

The base’s front door burst apart in an explosion of light and smoke, Taylor stepping inside with 5 Majora pieces hanging around her neck. “Everyone!” Link took his sword out of its holster. “Defensive positions!” Mario charged, a line of orange light attaching her hand to his neck. Taylor raised her hand, hanging him upwards. Cappy flew at Taylor, who took out her inkbrush as Mario fell. “Ohh...” He rubbed his throat. “Thanks Cap-Cappy, watch out!” The ghost barely managed to dodge Taylor swinging her brush, leaving trenches in the floor and roof. He flew around Taylor’s head, forcing her to turn around before slamming into her face. “Gah! You little-!” She grabbed Cappy, tossing him onto the floor. Luigi caught her from behind, yelling, “Please kid! Stop this!” She turned into a squid, slipping behind him where he barely managed to roll under a swing of her inkbrush. “I’ve almost won! There’s no way I’m letting any of you stop me!” She slammed her brush into the floor, causing a shockwave in front of her. Pit and Dark Pit jumped over the ripples in the floor, firing white and purple arrows. Taylor dodged the projectiles, gesturing at Pit to mystically attach her hand to his wings. He screamed in pain as he was telekinetically tossed into the air, his wings pulled until they felt like they would snap off his back. “Please! Stop!” “Put him down, you little whelp!” Dark Pit charged at Taylor, splitting his bow into twin swords to slash at her. She blocked his strikes with her inkbrush handle, dropping Pit to the ground before telekinetically swinging Dark Pit in a circle, tossing him behind Pit. “Thanks Pittoo.” Link put on a blue mask from his bag while he ran, screaming in pain as he transformed. His limbs elongated, doubling in height. Gills appeared on his neck, his skin turned blue, and sharp triangular growths manifested on his elbows. The fish-man jumped, his growths firing at Taylor like boomerangs. She held out her palms, firing spheres of magic energy that destroyed the biological weapons. “None of you stand a chance against my new power!” She swung her inkbrush, destroying part of the wall to reveal a tiny compartment containing the final Majora piece. “Interesting hiding place.” She created a mystic rope to drag it to herself. “Now for the real fun to begin.” She created a shockwave around herself that knocked everyone to the ground, upturning the room itself before teleporting away. “We…have to stop her. Now that she has all the pieces, it’s going to take everything we’ve got.” Link stood up, Callie dialing her communicator. “You guys need to get back right now! Taylor broke in; she has the sixth piece!” A minute later, Lauren, Marcus, and Katherine teleported into the middle of the decimated living room. “Guys! You alright?” Katherine asked, helping Pearl up. “Yeah, but I didn’t even get a hit off on that girl.” “More importantly, we need to stop Majora, now.” Cappy added. The team left the base, looking up to see the blood red sky. Dark clouds swirled, converging on the cave in the forest. “Oh man, I’m getting Scarlet King flashbacks already!” Marie exclaimed before a massive explosion went off near the plaza a mile away. “Come on, we need to stop them!” Link commanded, running in the direction of the blast. “Well, at least there’s no question where she is.” Marcus noted to himself.

Dozens of civilians wandered around Inkopolis plaza, having no idea what was happening, until the sky gradually took on a crimson hue. The ground was decimated by an explosion that sent smoke billowing in the air and tables upturned. A girl wearing a heart-shaped mask floated in the air above the smoke, laughing at the destruction surrounding her. “Now this… this is our night! The night of Majora!” She held out her hand, creating another explosion of orange light as the civilians hastily evacuated in their panic. A group of 16 entered the plaza, staring up at the demon. “Taylor! What the hell are you doing?!” Marcus screamed, aiming his splatling while charging a blast of plasma. “It’s simple, really. we’re just taking our revenge!” She dove to the pavement, slamming her inkbrush to the ground to create a massive shockwave. The two Pits launched a volley of spectral arrows, each of the dozens of projectiles stopped in midair. With a casual gesture, Taylor reversed the direction of the arrows, forcing Marina to hold out her brella as a shield. Pearl shifted her dualies into daggers, charging at Taylor. She created plate-sized translucent orange discs on her palms, holding them out to block the daggers before turning them to slash with the serrated edges. Pearl turned around, crouching to duck under the weapons before they were thrown into the group one above the other. While most of them scattered, Mario ran directly away from the discs, throwing Cappy to backflip off the hat onto the upper disc before turning in midair to dive at Taylor. He ducked under a swing of her inkbrush, punching at her until she grabbed his fist to toss him behind her. “You can’t stop us! We will consume this world in darkness and fire!” Marcus fired his splatling, the plasma knocking Taylor back a few feet. She levitated in the air, emitting beams of orange light from her palms. While the agents avoided the mystic energies, Kat fired purple ink from her dualies before tossing one of her daggers. Taylor had no reaction to the weapon embedded in one of her natural 3 hearts, regrowing the skin around it until the dagger clattered to the ground. Mario tossed Cappy again, jumping off of him, followed by Luigi springboarding on Cappy to somersault off of Mario. “What? What is this? Let go of us, you grating green grappler!” She tried to shake Luigi off of her legs, until Cappy was thrown at the back of her head to knock her to the ground, yelling, “Hats off to you, ya shrill psycho!” Taylor’s fist glowed orange as she punched up at Luigi, forcing him off of her. While she stood up, Link used a brown mask to transform into a muscular creature with rock-like growths on its back, rolling towards the masked girl while dodging the explosions she tossed at him. Once he got close enough, Link unfolded himself, transforming into the fish-man from earlier to twist sideways in midair and dropkick Taylor in the chest. “No, no this-this can’t be happening. You can’t stop us. Nothing can stop us! Just try and stop us, I dare you!” “Well, if you insist.” Ethan charged an explosive shot from his splatling while Sydney and Madison shot green ink from their splattershot and octoshot to stick Taylor’s feet to the pavement. She conjured a translucent orange shield to deflect the energy sphere, forcing Ethan to roll out of the way of the blast while Trent jumped out of the ink behind Taylor, shifting from his squid form into a humanoid to plunge his daggers into her shoulders. Taylor grabbed Trent, tossing him away before creating an explosion of orange light to melt the ink surrounding her. “What is wrong with you all? We’re just trying to have a bit of fun! What’s so wrong about that?” “You’ve gone completely nuts! You’re putting everyone in danger, and for what? Fun? Revenge?” Marcus fired his splatling, only for Taylor to create an orange line between herself and the plasma orb. “Yes, now we remember.” She tossed the orb, letting it explode directly behind her while she flew inches above the ground to kick Marcus in the chest, knocking him away from the group. He skidded on the pavement, burning his skin before audibly knocking his head on the side of a building. “You know, it’s amazing.” He muttered, standing up while wiping a bit of ink-blood from his mouth. “You’re possessed by that...that thing, and yet you still hate me.” “Of course we hate you. You betrayed us, left us.” “Shut up! Just shut up, you petty, abusive little sociopath! You forced a kiss on me! You never let me make a decision without your permission! You hit me whenever I made the slightest mistake! You cheated on me, and still tried to get me to go back out with you! But you know what? After I moved here, I practically forgot about you. I stayed in contact with my friends from Melani county, joined the New Squidbeak Splatoon, made a new life for myself. But all you’ve done since we met again last year is try to get revenge on me because I had the nerve to stand up to you. I never did anything to you except defend myself when you tried to kill me, and now you’re still deluding yourself into thinking this whole thing is somehow my fault!” “Stop! You’re ruining everything!” She screamed, the high-pitched demonic voice overlapping with her own. Lauren fired several bursts of plasma at Taylor’s shoulder, knocking her back an inch before she conjured an orange shield as large as herself to block the last few shots. Taylor spun around, turning the shield sideways to toss at the group. The agents shifted into their cephalopod forms, allowing the spectral discus to pass overhead while the five dimensional foreigners jumped on top of the makeshift weapon. Taylor conjured a scythe made of orange light that knocked the group out of the air while her giant discus exploded behind them, knocking them forward several feet. “Now see?! Isn’t this fun?!” Taylor shot straight into the air, creating a shockwave that upturned the concrete within a 20-foot radius. “Come on, we’re getting stomped here! Any ideas? I’m open to suggestions!” Link gestured at Taylor as she tossed spheres of orange light that sparked massive explosions. “You honestly think you can beat us? You were never even players in this game, just pawns. And pawns...” She conjured a thick orange rope attaching her hand to Link’s neck, levitating him to her height while he grasped at his throat, sputtering for breath. “...are meant to be sacrificed.” She clenched her fist, tightening the stranglehold. Link tried to reach into his satchel, his face turning bright blue as Taylor floated closer to him. The rope constricting his throat turned to a bright purple, the mask on her face exuding a black and violet aura. On the ground below, a group of 5 inklings appeared from behind the agents. “Woah! What the-?” Eric yelled, while Link kicked out at Taylor to force her to drop him to the ground. “I gotcha!” One of the inklings jumped forward, holding out his arms to break Link’s fall before dropping to the ground from the sudden additional weight. “Ugh… tha-thanks. Who…?” “Tyler.” The inkling helped the smaller swordsman to his feet while he rubbed his neck. “Nice catch.” He chuckled raspily, drinking from another bottle of red liquid as the black markings on his throat disappeared. “Eric, what took you guys so long?” Lauren asked. “Well, these guys all left their transporters at home.” “Yeah, plus you weren’t at the base when we got there, so we had to default to our usual strategy of following the explosions.” Margaret added. “Yeah, well, we’re glad to have the backup. Now, would someone mind explaining why her magic changed color?” Pit pointed out. “Oh, it’s simple really.” Taylor floated down to the ground, her body hanging limp like a puppet on strings. Her voice had completely disappeared, drowned out by the eldritch, unknowable tone of the mask, “It means I’m in control again.” The tendrils attaching Majora’s mask to the back of Taylor’s head grew at a blinding pace, wrapping around her torso and limbs until she became a red, purple, and black humanoid figure with two bulging orange eyes and no mouth, leaving her heart-shaped face completely unreadable. “I am Majora! And this has got to be my favorite puppet yet! It’s been so long since I had a physical form, let alone a willing host. This girl must really have it out for you!” Whip-like growths emerged from her torso and palms, striking the 21-strong team and knocking them to the pavement. “Yeah! Now this is fun!” “Link, you said you’re open to suggestions?” Marcus started, “Why not use that mask you used last time?” “I...I…. that’s a last resort! It’s only for emergencies!” “Well what in the name of the great zapfish do you call this?!” Pearl yelled, gesturing to the transformed girl. “I… well, you’ve got a point.” He pulled the grey-haired mask out of his bag, ducking under another of Majora’s whips before placing it on his face. He screamed in agony, quadrupling in height. His tunic transformed into metallic armor with golden swirls painted on the breastplate, blue and red markings appeared on his face as it took on a pale coloration, and his eyes became white and emotionless as his hair turned gray. His relatively small sword, thin and sharp with a gold and white diamond pattern, grew and split apart into a six-foot greatsword with two blades intertwined with one another in a double-helix pattern to leave two wide gaps between the blades. “I am the Fierce Deity, hero of Termina!” He passed the sword between his hands, turning it in a full circle in front of himself before charging at Majora. He sliced at the tendrils as they shot out at him, glowing blue discs launching from the sword to cut the growths until he jumped in the air, spinning in a full circle to slice at Majora diagonally. The demon fell backwards, pivoting on its hand to restore its balance. “No! You can’t-! I won’t let you ruin my fun this time! Never again! You won our game last time, but this time I’ll win! I’ll beat you! I’ll beat this entire world! I! Am! Majora!” The entity launched a salvo of tendrils at Link, forcing him to cut them down in rapid succession as his sword turned into a blue and silver blur. After a half minute, one of the tentacles smacked Link in the chest, knocking him over while his sword fell out of his hands and the chestplate collapsed inwards, constricting his breath as he struggled to stand up. “Yes… I can feel it. I’m getting stronger! You won’t be able to stop me now! Never again!” The tendrils wrapped around Majora, covering the mask and every inch of its body as the entity grew to double the Fierce Deity form’s size. Its arms dropped to the ground, turning into thick visceral ropes while glowing orange eyes appeared in its head exuding black and purple smoke. “Ugh… no. You… you can’t be back! I killed you!” Link yelled, tearing off his destroyed upper armor with his bare hands to reveal his torso was painted with red and blue tribal patterns. “Maybe, but you can’t keep a good demon down!” It shot one of its arms at Link’s face, shattering the mask. The boy screamed in pain as he rolled on the pavement in his normal form. “No… the… the Fierce Deity...” “The Fierce Deity was a cheater! Now that you can’t call on his power, I can finally win this game!” Majora towered over Link, enveloping him in one of its arms and lifting him into the air. “And the penalty for losing the game is-” Marcus fired a blast of plasma, severing Majora’s arm at the shoulder and helping Link push the tentacle off of himself while the demon regrew its limb. “You alright, man?” “No! Without the Fierce Deity’s mask, we don’t stand a chance!” The entity grabbed them both, slamming the two boys into the concrete before dragging them into the air. “Stop kidding yourselves. You never really stood a chance against me. After all, if winning comes down to having fun, then I’m the biggest winner of the past ten millennia!” It tightened its grip, causing its prey to cry out in agony as Link’s bones cracked and Marcus’s organs caved in on themselves. The two pits fired mystic arrows from their bows, while Samantha and Marie shot blue ink and plasma from their respective chargers. The four projectiles struck Majora in the chest, forcing it to toss Marcus and Link to the ground. “Kids!” Mario called out, Luigi and him helping the other two stand. “Is anything broken?” Luigi inquired, supporting Link as he struggled to stay upright. “No, I-I can still fight.” He tried to walk forward, only to double over and vomit. “Okay, so I might’ve cracked a rib or two.” He gasped out, “Nothing...nothing a bit of...of red potion can’t...fix.” Drinking from a bottle of the red liquid, he stood up, regaining his breath. “Yeah, that’s better. How’re you holding up over there, kid?” “I’m fine.” Marcus confirmed, briefly gasping for breath. “Just a bit of internal bruising.” He dialed his communicator, “Sheldon, how’re the Inkstriker and Splat Buggy coming along?” “I’m afraid they’re still in testing. Again, it’s the combining mechanism that’s giving us problems.” “Figures.” He muttered, turning off the device. “Don’t you see?” The demon screeched, marching towards the group of twenty-one. “I’ve already won, and the time has come for you to accept your defeat!” It swiped its tentacle-arms forward, stretching them out long and fast enough to knock its opponents back to the pavement they were already so familiar with. “Guys, we have to retreat. There’s no way we can beat this guy right now; we need a different strategy.” Callie ordered, activating her transporter. The rest of the group followed suit, abandoning Majora to its own devices for the time being.

“I don’t believe it!” Dark Pit snarled, throwing one of his swords down on the floor. “We just ran away?! How could we just run away? That thing is still out there!” “Yes, but in case you didn’t notice, we weren’t getting anywhere fast with it.” Link rebutted. “The Fierce Deity’s mask was our ace in the hole; our best bet to beat Majora, and it just shrugged it off like it was nothing. Last time I used the mask against that creature, I wiped the floor with it no problem. But that form… I’ve never seen it take on that form before. Now that it’s transformed into that thing, it’s going to be way harder to beat than last time. Which, considering I had to give time itself a hernia to stop Majora back in termina, really doesn’t bode well for us.” “Okay, that means we need a new ace in the hole.” Callie added bluntly. “Marina, remember when you disabled the special function on our hero DX weapons?” “Wait, special function? That sounds awesome; why would you turn it off?” Pit asked loudly. “Because it was too dangerous!” Marina snapped, putting a hand over her mouth. “Sorry, sorry, it’s just… look, Sheldon and I originally created the hero DX weapons to give us an edge against one of our most powerful enemies. We modded them to be able to use specials, these super attacks we sometimes use in our turf war sports. They were key to saving the world from a psycho AI, but a while afterwards, we found out the special functions actually ran the risk of causing a massive explosion if activated. It’s a lot of technical stuff, but the long and short of it is the specials just aren’t meant to be activated outside turf wars. We got lucky.” “Well, what if we got lucky again?” Dark Pit offered. “The moody one’s got a point. Now that the Fierce Deity’s mask is gone, we’re going to need every advantage we can get.” Link added. “I don’t know. I mean, it’s incredibly risky. Still, it might really be our only hope. But as soon as we’re done taking out Majora, we’re coming back to base so I can disable the special function again.” Marina conceded. “Alright, fair enough.” Marcus agreed, handing her his splatling. “Thanks. Just put your hero DX weapons in the lab so me and Sheldon can work on them and then, I dunno, just take a break until we’re ready to fight that thing again.”

“So, how’s the brooding going?” Lauren asked, startling Marcus as he stared out the window at the explosions emanating from the nearby city. “I’m not brooding. I’m just thinking about what I’ve done before, and how my decisions have affected others for better or for worse.” He gestured out the window in front of the chair they were sitting on. “Mostly for the worse, it seems.” “You know, back in Innsmouth county, we had a word for that. Brooding.” She looked out the window, where Majora had been destroying everything around it for the past hour. “So. What’re you thinking about?” “It’s nothing. Just thinking about my ex.” “Oh. Her.” “I know it sounds weird, but part of me thinks maybe there’s some good in her, like, I dunno, maybe Majora corrupted her.” “I’m not sure. I mean, from what I’ve heard, she was kind of psycho before. What was she like when you two first met?” “She seemed nice enough at the time. In hindsight, my first clue probably should’ve been when she convinced me to ditch my homework, and then constantly ordered for me at restaurants. I really can’t remember if she ever accepted my input on anything.” “Oh. Yeah, I, uh, I kind of figured that. Was there anything else? I know from experience it’s best to talk about this sort of thing, or else you just keep letting it fester, which is about as healthy as it sounds.” “Well, I remember she’d sometimes do these really nice things for me, usually after she did something she knew would hurt me, that always made me think I could still make it work.” “Oh, so she was a gaslighter.” “Yeah, pretty much.” “Okay, guys, they’re ready!” Sheldon yelled from the open laboratory. “Hell yeah, let’s do this!” Lauren yelled, jumping off the chair. “Now remember, we’ll have to charge up our specials. That means we’ll have to fight Majora for a while.” Marina explained as she and Sheldon tossed the weapons to their owners. “And remember, we’ve only got one shot, so you’ll all have to use your specials at once. Just keep in mind, we accelerated the activation speed.” Sheldon added. “Alright, but we’re coming with you.” Nate asserted. “No argument here. We’re going to need as much backup as possible.” Link agreed.

Link nocked an arrow in his bow, a bright glow emanating from the head, before loosing it in the direction of the massive creature in the middle of the street. “You!” Majora turned towards them, swiping its arm to slice into a nearby building. “And here I thought you’d quit the game. Now we can get back to the fun!” It slammed its tentacle into the ground, leaving a trench in the road while the small army barely managed to jump out of the way. Nate pushed his inkbrush forward, dodging its attacks before pivoting on one foot to swing the giant brush into Majora’s leg, only to get kicked away. The entity shot one of its arms out at link, who transformed into the rock creature to grab the limb. “What do you think you’re doing, you little insect?” Link pulled on the arm, causing Majora to stumble forward while he took off the mask, running up the thick rope as a human before jumping off and turning back into the fish-man to launch the sharp elbow growths into the eldritch creature’s eyes. “You insignificant mortal! How dare you!” “Well, it’s not that difficult.” Link explained, reverting to his default species. “Hate to break it to you, but you’re really unlikable.” Majora prepared to step on Link, staggering backwards with a spectral arrow in its sole. “Sorry to be a heel!” Pit yelled, splitting his bow into dual swords. “How many brain cells did you use on that one?” Dark Pit absently inquired, firing another arrow into Majora’s knee. “I dunno, 6?” “So, half of your supply?” “Oh, you’re hilarious, Pittoo.” Their conversation was interrupted by Majora slamming its arm into them to knock the two dozens of feet away. “Guys, come on! Stop arguing and fight that thing!” Cappy floated around them, nudging the winged swordsmen until they stood up. The inklings and octolings among the group started firing their weapons at Majora, while Callie, Eric, and Nate swung their melee-based rollers and inkbrush at its legs. After a few seconds, Marcus, Katherine, Lauren, Callie, Marie, Pearl, Marina, Ethan, Trent, Sydney, and Madison’s hair glowed and started levitating as their specials activated. “Woah! You weren’t kidding when you said you made them faster!” Marcus gestured at Majora, calling out, “Alright team, now’s the time!” “Time for what? Time to surrender? To forfeit the game and accept your defeat?” “Hardly! We’re the New Squidbeak Splatoon, defenders of Inkopolis! Slayers of the Scarlet King’s army! Bane of the Chaos Insurgency!” The eleven-man group screamed in unison, “Special: on!” The Myers siblings were propelled by jets of ink into the air, firing blasts of explosive ink while flying around Majora as Lauren, Sydney, and Madison briefly rose into the air before plummeting down in three overlapping explosions of ink that struck the demon. Callie and Marie fired a massive laser-focused stingray cannon and a salvo of burst bombs respectively, while Pearl encased herself in an explosive spherical baller. Marina conjured a massive hammer-like stamp larger than herself, striking Majora’s legs as Ethan tossed a device to create a localized rain of ink, Trent firing a volley of explosive shoulder-mounted tenta missiles. “This is impossible! You can’t defeat me! I am Majora! Your fate is to be consumed in fire and darkness!” “Fate can shove it where the sun don’t shine!” Dark Pit started shooting his own arrows, while Pit and Link fired their own divine and light arrows. Despite Mario and Luigi being unable to cause any significant damage, Majora eventually entered its death throes before dissolving into nonexistence. “Looks like he couldn’t mask his cowardice!” Link yelled. The only remnants were a small girl and even smaller mask laying in the middle of the crater where it’d been standing. “Taylor!” Marcus took a step forward before Lauren put a hand on his shoulder. “Are you sure?” “Yeah. Maybe this whole thing knocked some sense into her.” “Fair enough, but just remember there’s no guarantee.” Mark nodded, sliding down the side of the 10-foot deep crater until he reached Taylor. “So, what’ve we learned about getting help from interdimensional demon-gods in petty revenge schemes?” Taylor gradually rose to her hands and knees before lunging out at Marcus, raking his eye with her fingernail. The boy yelped, grabbing his eye. “I… I won’t stop! Not after everything you’ve done to me! I had so much power, but you… you took it all away from me! Just because you couldn’t stand to see someone stronger than you!” She swiped the mask off the ground and placed it over her face, only for it to fall off. “No… Majora? My lord?” Taylor looked between her ex-boyfriend, the lifeless mask, and the small army above the crater before running away in the opposite direction. “Hey! Get back here, coward!” Link called, setting an arrow in his bow. “No need for that.” Callie grabbed his bow from the side, gently lowering it to the ground. “While the nerds were working on upgrading our weapons, I called the police department and explained the situation to them. Now that she’s lost her powers, the civilian police can handle her on their own.” “Got it. Looks like she wasn’t the only one who lost their powers.” He slid to the bottom of the crater along with Katherine and Lauren. “You okay, bro?” Kat pulled Mark’s hand away, revealing his eye turned milky white. “Y...yeah. She...nicked me...pretty good.” “Doesn’t look too bad. Just wait a few hours; it should clear up on its own.” “Good. Now come on, let’s get back home. If I remember right, you’ve got a base to clean.” Lauren asserted. “You still remember that?” “Hey, mistakes and consequences and all that.” “Yeah, yeah, alright.” He smiled, leaving the crater with the others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Splatoon 3 has finally been announced. Honestly, this feels so surreal, but it's finally coming. I don't think I'll be incorporating it into this particular fic, but it could still come up later on.


	9. Of Souls And Needles part I: the hand-tailed dog

“And… done!” Marcus stepped back, looking at the kitchen sink he’d just finished cleaning. “Hey Marina! I think I finished the kitchen!” The octoling spent a few minutes overlooking his handiwork. “Looks good, kid.” “You know, when Marie said I’d be cleaning the entire base, I thought she was being hyperbolic.” “Yeah, well, maybe now you won’t do stupid things that risk demonic entities entering our dimension to destroy the world.” “How sad is it that that’s actually somewhat applicable to our lives?” Marcus dropped the washcloth into the sink while Marina chuckled to herself. “Okay, good news is you’ve somehow managed to finish half the house in just about a week. How did you even manage that?” “Well, I don’t have to worry much about my actual job since the Crust Bucket was blasted apart during our fight with Majora. On the bright side, Kat’s got a job with Sheldon at Ammo Knights, so at least we won’t have to become hobos.” “Oh yeah, I remember Sheldon told me he took her on as an apprentice. Apparently, he’s also teaching her about how the KartMech components work so she can help us finalize them.” “Oh, cool. Speaking of which, how long do you think it’ll take?” “According to professor E. Gadd, it shouldn’t take any longer than a week or two. Depending on when Kat starts and how much help she actually is, it could go even quicker.” “Sounds good. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to take a break before finding an actual job.” Marina shrugged in agreement. “Well, I’d say you’ve earned it. But take your break at your house, will you?” “Sure. I think I’ve seen plenty of this place anyway.” Marcus casually waved at Marina as he left through the front door.

Ammo Knights was the premiere weapons shop in Inkopolis, having moved to the square after it supplanted the plaza as the center of industry within the city. Sheldon stood at a counter in front of a wall covered in examples of every available weapon class-dualies, splatlings, and splattershots, to name a few-waiting for a customer. Sometime around noon, a yellow-haired inkling waked inside, ringing the bell just above the door. “Ah, Lauren. Fancy seeing you here. So, what would you like?” “Hey, Sheldon, I busted my splattershot in turf war last week. Should I get a new one or would it be cheaper to have it fixed?” “Well, I’d rather look at the damages. Did you bring it with you?” “Yeah, here.” She took the firearm out of her pocket, placing the bent and crumpled heap on the counter. “Jeez, you weren’t kidding.” Sheldon adjusted his oversized goggles, turning the scrap in his hands. “You sure this happened in a turf war?” “Yeah, I, uh, I kinda tried throwing it to attack when I ran out of ink. And then it got hit by a bunch of burst bombs. And then a burst bomb launcher.” “Ah, well, that happens. I should know, seeing as I’d be out of a job if it didn’t.” He jumped off the stool that helped him reach the counter, taking the splattershot while gesturing the inkling to follow him. They walked past rows of short-burst blasters, long-range chargers, and bucket-shaped sloshers among other weapons of varying models, brands, and types, until reaching the back of the store. An octoling was hunched over a table, having taken apart a splattershot jr. to clean the individual pieces. “Hey Kat, finally got a job?” The octoling yelped, dropping the small objects she’d been working with. “Lauren! Don’t startle me like that; I’m working!” She sighed, turning back to her work. “But yeah, I’ve been working here ever since Sheldon finished overseeing the repairs at Shellendorf Institute a few days ago. Anyway, I’m guessing you’re looking for a new turf war weapon?” “Actually, she’s looking for a repair job. Here.” Sheldon passed her the ruined splattershot. “Wow. You sure you didn’t accidentally take this on an agent 3 mission? And worse, without inviting me?” “No, it just got hit by a bunch of bombs in last week’s turf war, that’s all. More importantly, can you fix it?” “Yeah, but it probably won’t be ready for at least a week or two. In the meantime, you could always buy a different weapon.” “Well, I am kinda strapped for cash right now.” She muttered, looking around the store for something cheap. “Oh!” She pointed to a small, rectangular gun in a display case. “How ‘bout that jr.?” “That’ll be, uh, I think 8,700 coins.” Katherine remembered from what little experience she’d garnered, looking at Sheldon to see him nod in confirmation. “Alright. I think I can manage that.” Lauren took nine sea snails out of her pocket, placing them on the counter. While Sheldon passed her the jr. and 300 coins’ worth of change, Katherine started work on the splattershot. “So, anyway Sheldon, I was thinking about an idea I had for the KartMech.” She started, taking a low-powered drill to the busted weapon. “Oh really? Well, I suppose there’s no harm in hearing you out.” “Okay, what if in addition to the two cars combining into a single mech, the Inkstriker and SplatBuggy could transform into individual mech armors?” “That’s actually not a bad idea.” Sheldon mused. “That way, the pilots would be able to split the KartMech’s strength for added versatility. Of course, the individual components would only be half as strong and durable as the combined form, meaning we’d have to decide whether to split or combine the mechs on a case-by-case basis.” “Yeah, true. Still, they’d be easier to control since we wouldn’t have to worry about synchronizing our movements.” “Well, I’d certainly like a go in one of those mech suits, combined or separate.” Lauren interjected. “Yeah, it’s pretty awesome. Believe me, there’s nothing quite like being in the head of a twenty-foot hunk of metal that can fly and shoot rockets like some sort of giant tenta-missiles.” “Well, for now let’s just focus on making sure the things won’t explode if they’re overexerted.” Sheldon recommended, muttering to himself, “Even if I have been mulling over some modification ideas of my own.” “Thanks for this.” Lauren tossed the splattershot jr. a few inches in the air. “Speaking of which, how much for the fix?” “For the condition it’s in, I’d say 10 sea snails.” Sheldon answered. “You can pay it all either up front or on delivery, or do it half-and-half.” “I guess I might as well just pay up front.” She placed the payment on the counter. “Pleasure doing business with you. And good luck with tomorrow’s match.” “Thanks man. Hey Kat! You want to play a turf war tomorrow?” “Yeah, sure!” The slightly younger of the two called back, still engrossed in her day job.

A tiny bell rang above a plexiglass door as Marcus entered the Cardamari Cafe, a restaurant most well-known for hosting Inkopolis’s annual card-game tournament for the past decade. He approached the cash register with its overhead menu, surprised at the evolved shrimp in front of it. “What the-Sean? You work here?” “Oh, Marcus! I was wondering where you’d gone after everything that happened a few weeks ago.” “Yeah, same here. I thought you didn’t want me working for you anymore, since you never called me.” “No, nothing like that. I just figured, with you being an agent and all, you wouldn’t have time for a civilian job.” “Actually, I could use the payment. Turf wars don’t pay for everything, y’know.” “Alright, guess I shouldn’t’ve just assumed, then. Tell you what, just fill out a resume for legalities’ sake, and then I’ll count your time at the crust bucket towards your internship here.” “Sounds fair enough. So, what about the night shift employee? Does she still work here or what?” “You mean Wendy? Yeah, but she’s doing the day shift now. She’s in the kitchen, if you want to talk to her after you’re done with the resume.” “Alright, thanks.” Marcus accepted the resume Sean handed him. While he started writing at a nearby table, his communicator beeped. “Yeah?”

Lauren walked through the streets of Inkopolis, having agreed to meet with Trent at the local arcade. The neon signs glowed through the shadows cast on the buildings and streets by the angle of the sunlight, bathing the sidewalk in an artificial multicolored glow. She sat on a bench in front of a movie theater, taking a brief break to pick rocks out of her shoes. “Okay, seriously, how did that even get in there?” She tossed an inch-tall action figure-some superhero from the 70’s, she absently noted-into a shadowed alleyway behind her, followed by a high-pitched animalistic yelp. “What the…?” She snuck into the alley, gripping her hero splattershot DX. A pair of glowing yellow eyes shone through the gloom, the silhouette of a large four-legged creature barely visible stalking towards her. A low growl drew her attention to a pair of glistening fangs while barely noticing the large, strange shape just above her. Lauren kept her finger on the trigger of her weapon, barely pressing down before a massive brown hand shot out from behind and above the creature. The thing grabbed Lauren, 5 hooked claws digging into her back as she was manhandled into the air. She screamed in pain, kicking her legs out a few feet above the ground while bashing her splattershot against the tail attached to the hand. After a few agonizing seconds, she managed to fire a shot of plasma at the animal, forcing it to release her. Lauren fell to the concrete, rolling out of the alley while leaving splotches of yellow ink-blood as she ducked in front of the theater. Gasping for air, she pulled out her communicator. “Guys! Mark, Kat, I dunno, Pit, I need backup. There’s a monster by the Blue Moon theater, and I’m bleeding real bad.” A man-sized creature walked out of the alley, showing slick brown fur. It had a long snout filled with razor-sharp teeth, and bright yellow eyes. Its paws resembled massive hands complete with opposable thumbs and curved inch-long claws, with a fifth hand at the end of its 9-foot tail. “Stay back!” Lauren fired her splattershot, still doubled over from pain, while the entity jumped over the shot at her. She rolled backwards to avoid it jumping on her, leaving claw marks on the sidewalk before three others teleported near them. “Lauren!” Katherine ran over to help her friend stand upright while Pit shot at the creature. It jumped to the side, forcing them to duck under a swipe of its fifth hand. “Hold on, I think I can fix this.” Kat started pouring disinfectant on the puncture wounds, gesturing to the monster. “You two can handle this, right?” “You kidding? This thing doesn’t stand a chance!” Pit charged at it with his dual swords, as it swerved out of his way. The creature stabbed at Pit with its tail, only for him to lunge backwards while Marcus fired at it. The thing turned around, briefly running on the side of the theater by stabbing its claws into the wall before jumping over Mark’s head. He successfully dodged its initial swipe, only for the beast to backhand him into the theater. Marcus crashed through the window, wincing from the cuts as broken glass spread on the floor. He stood up, picking shards out of his tentacle-hair while civilians evacuated in the middle of waiting in the concession line. The animal jumped through the window, pinning Marcus’s arms down while skewering its claws into the floor by his shoulders. It bit at his face, only for Marcus to shift into a squid to slip away from the tooth-filled maw. Pit kicked the door open, tossing Marcus’s splatling to him. “Thanks! I was wondering what happened to this!” The hand-tailed monstrosity barged past them, clawing at the concession stand. Marcus fired his splatling, the creature effortlessly dodging the blast. Pit ran at the creature, slicing at it with his twin blades until it grabbed them in its forepaws. Its tail-hand plunged into the floor to stand upright before Pit kicked it in the chest, gliding backwards while Lauren and Katherine entered the building through the open door. “You okay?” “Yeah, Kat just had to put some gauze on my back. I’ll manage.” The three ran at the creature while it beelined to the hallway, bursting through the door into one of the screening rooms. “We have to stop that thing; there’s civilians in there!” Lauren yelled, pursuing the creature with the others. A massive screen showed two inklings in a shootout while the crowd of moviegoers evacuated through the emergency exits, the interdimensional menace lacerating the leather seats. Pit fired one of his infinite supply of spectral arrows, stabbing the monster in the side as it yowled in pain. Marcus rolled on the floor, picking up a dropped bucket of popcorn to slam into the thing’s snout while yelling, “Eat overpriced buttery death, you 5-handed freak!” Katherine jumped on top of the entity, plunging her daggers into its back. It attempted to grab her with its tail, only for Lauren to shoot its palm with her splattershot. Pit jump-kicked the creature, causing it to fall into the aisle. “Anyone else ready to finish this once and for all?” Lauren asked, readying her weapon. “You kidding?” Katherine crossed her daggers, shifting them into dualie mode. “This freak’s going down!” “Uh, Kat? You don’t have any plasma, remember? Sorry, but I don’t think there’s much you can do right now” Marcus pointed out, while the creature continued struggling to stand. “Well, what if we combined your daggers with my Palutena bow?” Pit suggested. “Seriously? Do you think that would work?” “It’s worth a shot.” “Alright.” She shifted her dualies back to dagger mode, handing them to Pit. “I feel kind of bad killing a wild animal.” He admitted, drawing the daggers into his bow so the arrow was wedged between them. “But it’s still a dangerous wild animal!” Before the monster could attack them, Lauren and Marcus fired their splattershot and splatling while Pit launched his arrow along with Kat’s daggers. The combined explosions enveloped the thing, Lauren remarking, “Guess he couldn’t get a grip after all!” “Dude! What did I just say about it being a wild animal?” “Hey, tell that to the puncture wounds in my back.” “The point is...” Katherine interjected, walking over to pick up her weapons. “...we beat that creature. And Lauren, no more major injuries for at least a month.” “I make no promises. Still, I’m going to go home and take a break.” She teleported out of the theater, while Marcus turned to look at the screen. “Hey, dude, ready to go back home?” “Hold up a sec.” After a few seconds, he turned back. “Sorry, I just love that scene. Right, let’s head back.” “Cool. I’ll go back to base and let the others know what happened here.” Pit informed them, all three teleporting away.

“Hey, Pittoo, I’ve got something to tell you.” “Yeah? Whaddya need, Pitstain?” He sheathed his swords that he was practicing with on a rubber training dummy the New Squidbeak Splatoon had supplied him with. “Well, we fought a monster at a movie theater.” “So? I don’t know about you, but we’ve been fighting a lot of monsters lately.” “Well, yeah, but...” Pit leaned on his twin’s bedroom door. “...I dunno, this one felt different somehow. It definitely wasn’t an underworld monster, that’s for sure. Although, now that you mention it-” “I didn’t mention it.” “-it did kind of look like Twinbellows. If Twinbellows weren’t the size of a house, only had one head, wasn’t on fire, and had a hand on its tail. So, actually, that thing looked nothing like Twinbellows.” “Well, okay, but what does that have to do with anything?” Dark Pit asked, crossing his arms and tapping his foot impatiently. “Honestly, I’m not really sure. I’ve just got this feeling, like, I dunno, something bad is going to happen.” “Well, when it does, we’ll do what we do best.” “Take down the forces of darkness in the name of the light!” Pit yelled, stabbing his blade into the air in excitement. “Exactly. Now would you get out of my room?” He grabbed Pit’s shoulders, pushing him back out into the hallway before closing his door.

After teleporting back to her house, Lauren dropped herself on her couch. It was an old, dilapidated thing, with springs sticking out in various places and bits of cotton fluff littering the puke-yellow cushions. Despite the ostensible discomfort of the couch and the bandages, she found herself nodding off within a few minutes. At some point, her phone started to ring in her pocket, stirring her from her slumber. “Buh?” She blinked the sleep gunk out of her eyes, flipping open her phone. “Yo, Lauren, I’ve been at the arcade for the past hour. Where are you?” The inkling fell off the couch, nearly dropping her phone in surprise. “Oh, crud, Trent, I’m so sorry! I, I was heading to the arcade, and I got attacked by a monster, like this weird thing with a hand on its tail, and I got its claws in my back, and I’m sorry; I completely forgot about it.” “Woah, woah, Lauren, slow down. What was that about your back?” “Oh, don’t worry about it. I’m an agent; potentially life-threatening injuries are practically an everyday occurence for us.” “Yeah, that, uh, that’s not nearly as reassuring as you seem to think it is. Anyway, do you think we should reschedule, or do you think we should just forget about our little arcade visit entirely?” “No way; I’m fine. I’ll start heading back out right now.” “Really? Alright, cool. Hey, it’s about lunchtime anyway. Mind if I go out and get something so we can eat before heading to the arcade?” “Sure. You’re not hitting on me, are you?” “What? No!” Lauren could hear the surprise in Trent’s voice, and had to suppress the urge to laugh. “I’m kidding, man, I’m kidding. But yeah, that’s a good idea. How does Cardamari Cafe sound?” “Sounds good to me. And this time, please try not to get into another fight.” “Okay, I’ll see what I can do.” She stood up from the dirty old couch, leaving back into the streets.

Marcus walked through the doors of the Cardamari Cafe, unfolding his resume as he took it out of his pocket. “Hey, Sean, I finished the paperwork.” He placed it on the table for his employer to look over. “Sorry it took so long. I got, uh, a little sidetracked.” “Very well. That sort of thing happens. Just try to be more punctual when you actually start working here, alright?” “Yeah, of course.” The door to the kitchen opened, a girl walking through with a tray full of food. “Hey, Sean, who’s this order going to?” “That table over there.” Sean gestured with his two-clawed prawn hand near the back of the restaurant. “Thanks.” She walked out of sight, balancing the platter on one hand. “Right, well, I should be getting back to you by next week. For now, do you want to order something?” “Yeah, I’ll have a catfish burger, a hot dogfish, and some fries.” Sean nodded, writing down the order while explaining, “We have to do things a little differently here with only one waitress. Once you’re hired, you’ll be able to split the work with Wendy.” “Looking forward to it.” Marcus casually accepted the receipt before waiting at a random table. After a few minutes, Trent walked through the front door, closely followed by Lauren. “Hey Sean. I heard this place was under new management, but I didn’t expect you to be here.” “Ah, Lauren. Fancy seeing you again. Find any new employment lately?” “Eh, no. Too much going on in my personal life right now.” “Well, alright, but just remember, you can’t survive on turf war winnings alone. No matter how good you are.” “I’ll keep that in mind.” Lauren replied, ordering before Trent. “Right then, I’ll just write that all down. Oh, and Lauren, I think you’d be interested in who my assistant is.” “Yeah? Who is it?” She put her elbows on the counter, leaning forward. “A young woman named Wendy Laker.” Lauren blanched, wordlessly dragging Trent over to the table where Marcus was playing on a handheld device. “Woah, dude, what’s going on here?” Trent asked, sitting between the other two. “Marcus, you’re not planning to work here, are you?” “Uh, yeah. I just handed in my resume. What’s your problem?” “Nothing, except I just found out my sister works here.” “Wait, seriously? That sounds awesome! I’m really not seeing the problem here.” Lauren looked around as though worried they might be watched before continuing, “My sister doesn’t know that I’m an agent. After that whole alien invasion thing last year, I called Wendy and convinced her that you, me, and Katherine were only in that whole ‘integrating the New Squidbeak Splatoon into the public’ turf war because the agency wanted someone to stand in for the real agents. If she found out how much danger I’m constantly putting myself in, she’d flip her lid. Oh, hold up.” After half a minute, the waitress showed up with a tray of food. “Lauren? Sis, is that you?” She beamed, placing the entrees on the table. “Yeah! Oh, man, it’s been so long. What’re you even doing here? Tyler told me you went to Calamari county to join the music scene.” “Yeah, that whole thing kind of fell through.” She admitted. “Look, I’ve got a job to keep, but can we talk about this later?” She gave her address, the two agreeing to meet the next day. “Oh, Marcus, I can’t believe you got a job at the same place as my sister. Of all the establishments...” “Well, what’s the big deal? Everyone else here knows we’re agents. Crusty Sean knows we’re agents, and he’s our employer.” “Yeah, well, Wendy doesn’t know that I’m an agent, and frankly, I’d rather keep it that way. Of course, if she finds out you’re an agent, she’ll find out about me. Who knows what could happen?” “Okay, then I’ll just make sure she never finds out I’m an agent, simple as that. Only problem is, what if there’s a monster attack while I’m at work? Am I just supposed to leave you guys to it?” Lauren considered her answer for a few minutes. “Well, we have been expanding our roster lately, and with some pretty strong fighters I might add. Although, you might have a point with some of the stronger enemies we might face.” “Well, here’s a crazy idea.” Trent interjected, taking a bite of his food. “Why don’t you get a job here, too? I mean, if you did, you’d be able to keep an eye on Marcus and Wendy, spend time with your sister, and work your way up to not being perpetually broke all at once.” “I don’t know, man. Think about it: I’m already an agent. How am I supposed to balance that with having a job?” Marcus shrugged, answering, “I dunno. Personally, it’s worked out pretty well for me so far.” Lauren sighed, taking a suspiciously slow bite of her own food. “Maybe. I mean, I definitely need the money, that’s for sure.” “Yeah, no kidding. I’ve seen your house.” Marcus turned to Trent, shaking his head. “Alright, alright, You’ve made your point.” Lauren stood up, walking over to the counter. “Hey, Sean. So, uh, do you have any room for more employees?” “Well now, seeing as I only have a single waitress, I think I can work with a few more.” “Oh, right, of course. Anyway, could I-” She looked down to see a blank resume. “I look forward to having you back, kiddo.” “Thanks.”


	10. Of Souls And Needles part II: conquering undead of the north

In the middle of Inkopolis square, Lauren, Marcus, Katherine, and Wendy approached the lobby to enter one of the weekly turf wars. “Thanks for joining our team, sis. Usually we have to settle for a random teammate from off the street.” “Hey, no problem. I can’t believe it took us this long to get back in touch.” “Yeah, I’ve really missed you.” Lauren grinned, embracing Wendy. “So, why were you working at the crust bucket in the first place?” “Funny story.” The slightly shorter of the two yellow-haired inklings started as they registered their team. “See, after the whole singer thing fell through, I worked at a restaurant for a few months before I was able to move to Inkopolis. I guess I became kind of partial to working in the fast food industry.” “Hey, wait a sec. When exactly did you move here?” “Last year. I think it was a couple months before that giant red thing nearly destroyed the world.” “Wow.” Lauren started thinking as they were teleported to Port Mackerel, a shipyard littered with numerous containers. She wondered if it was possible that Wendy had been working at the crust bucket when she had been preparing to go back to Innsmouth county for the sake of her mental state, that she’d been a few feet away from an early reunion. “Hey, it’s fine now. Don’t forget, the New Squidbeak Splatoon destroyed that red thing. Of course, I wish they hadn’t used you guys as glorified decoys.” “Hey, it’s fine. They made sure we were safe until the whole thing blew over.” Katherine lied, just before the match started. “Alright, team Mobile Ink Force! Let’s do this!” Marcus yelled, firing blue ink from his splatling while the opposing team started spreading pink ink on the other side of the port. The members of team Mobile Ink Force split up, alternating between covering the floor in their ink and swimming through it in cephalopod form. Lauren eventually reached the middle of the stage, where one of the enemy team members was pushing an inkbrush forward to recolor the floor a viscous pink. He swiped the brush at Lauren, spraying her with the bright liquid. She fired her regular splattershot, replacing the pink with blue as her opponent submerged in his squid form, swimming through the liquid before popping out behind Lauren. He swung his weapon at her back, knocking her in the middle of the field of enemy ink. It stuck to her shoes, limiting her mobility. Lauren fired her splattershot downwards, while Wendy swam through the blue team’s ink. The pink team member noticed the ripples, tossing a pyramidal splatbomb at her. The younger girl jumped out, shifting into humanoid form while her back was covered in hot pink liquid from the explosive bursting directly behind her. She fired a large cylindrical blaster, the short burst of ink traveling far enough to explode on the opponent. Covered in blue liquid, he swung his brush in a circle before Lauren fired her splattershot to send him back to the pink team’s respawn generator. “Not bad! You’ve done this before, haven’t you?” “Eh, a few times. I only did one or two turf wars before moving out of Innsmouth county, then I was more focused on my music career while I was living in Calamari county. After that fell through, I decided to move to Inkopolis and see if I could find you.” “Wait, wait, wait. If you moved here specifically to look for me, why did it take so long for us to reunite?” Lauren tapped her firearm against Wendy’s shoulder. “Simple. I couldn’t pay my phone bill after moving here, which is part of why I had to work at the crust bucket. Trust me, I would’ve called you months ago if I could’ve.” “I...okay. I guess that makes sense. Now come on, let’s get back to the game.” “You got it!” The younger of the two fired her blaster, swimming through the ink trail while splitting up with Lauren. On the other side of a platform in the middle of the stage, Marcus fired his splatling at a pink-covered area until two octolings tossed a pair of splatbombs at his feet. He kicked them away so that they only partially covered him when they exploded, turning around and creating a trail of blue ink. While he swam upwards, one of the opposing team members fired a charger shot that barely missed its target before he rolled on top of the platform in humanoid form. While Marcus gave himself time to gradually recover, the other octoling swam up the trail his partner created. “Oh great. Just what I need.” The inkling muttered, rolling to avoid his opponent’s dualie shots. Marcus kept dodging the much faster weapons until their user ran out of ink. While he refilled his tank by submerging in octopus form, Marcus took the few seconds of opportunity to charge his splatling and banish the pink team member back to spawn. Looking below, he saw Katherine battling the octoling with the charger. Despite his weapon’s far superior range, she was able to gradually get closer while consistently dodging his strikes. Marcus jumped down, submerging into the blue ink in his squid form to swim closer to the fight. Jumping out as a humanoid, he fired his splatling. “There’s your opening!” “Thanks bro!” Katherine swam through the viscous cerulean substance, jumping out in humanoid form to kick the pink team member before he could fire his charger. “I won’t go-!” Katherine interrupted him by firing her dualies, forcing him to respawn elsewhere. “Oh, sorry, were you saying something?” Katherine grinned, spinning her dualies on her fingertips. “Come on, I think they’re trying to get a foothold in the northwest quadrant.” “Alright. Any idea where the others are?” Marcus asked as the two of them started running while shooting blue ink on the floor around them. “I’m not sure. I think I saw them heading off to the other side.” Kat gestured to the farther end of the stage. “Okay, it’s probably best if we keep ourselves split up anyway.” Marcus reasoned. “Agreed. That way, they won’t be able to take us out all at once, plus we can cover more ground. Now let’s hurry, I think we’ve only got less than a minute before the match ends. You take the north end, I’ll go south.” Marcus nodded, the two of them splitting up. Katherine swam through the blue ink, occasionally jumping out in octopus form before resubmerging. At some point, she came across a field of pink ink. Firing her dualies, she covered the area immediately in front of her in blue before tossing three splatbombs. A pink team member was forced into humanoid form by the sudden presence of enemy ink below his feet, preventing him from shapeshifting while slowing his movement. The inkling raised his brella, using the conical top as a shield. Katherine shot at the brella until its user launched the top forward. A pink trail manifested behind it, Kat dodging to the side before firing her dualies. Slowed down by the blue team’s ink, he was unable to avoid the shots sending him back to the pink team’s spawn point a few seconds before the timer rang for the end of the match. The eight teenagers left the stage, the pink team accepting their winnings. “Oh, man, that was fun! Sorry we didn’t win. Probably because us Lakers were too busy catching up.” Wendy admitted. “Eh, relax, it’s not important.” Lauren assured her. “If you want, we’d be happy to have you on the team.” “Yeah, we could use a permanent fourth member to round ourselves out.” Marcus added. “Besides, it’ll be fun to have two sibling pairs on one team.” Katherine pointed out. “Yeah, good point.” Wendy chuckled. “Plus, I think I’ll be seeing you plenty once we’re working at the cafe.” She turned to Marcus, continuing, “And your friend too. Gotta say, he’s kind of-” “Get down!” Lauren tackled her sister to the ground as a battle-axe flew above them, the curved metal embedding itself in the ground. “Woah what the-!?” A humanoid creature with rotted skin and sunken eyes clad in rust-brown metal armor charged at them, slamming Marcus aside hard enough to knock him to the ground next to the axe. “Gah… feels like a dump truck.” He looked up to see the creature pick up its weapon, barely rolling away in time to avoid it slicing into his head. “Oh man, and it smells like one too!” Katherine jumped on the undead’s back, firing her dualies at its helmet while it swung its axe wildly in front of itself. “Get the hell away from my brother!” It twisted its arm to swing the axe behind itself, forcing Kat to shift into octopus form so the axe struck the back of the armor. Barely stumbling a step forward from the momentum and impact, the warrior turned around to bring its axe down on Katherine. She transformed back into a humanoid, standing up to avoid the bladed weapon. The creature opened its rotted, decaying mouth, its voice sounding like rough stones grating against each other as its blackened teeth ground together. “I am a draugr, one of the great warriors of the ostmen. I will single-handedly conquer this new realm, and finally prove myself worthy of the halls of Valhalla!” The draugr charged forward, both teenagers jumping out of the way of the axe swing. “Come on, we have to get out of here now!” Lauren grabbed her sister’s wrist, dragging her away from the fight. “Mark! Kat! Let’s go!” “No argument here!” Marcus used his standard splatling to block an axe strike that sliced the weapon in half before running along with the others. “Okay, once we turn the corner, we should split up and go home. Wendy, you’ll be fine, right?” “I-yeah, I think so. You’ll call me the second you get to your place, right?” “Of course. I wish I could go with you, but I’d only slow you down. Please, you have to trust me on this.” The younger girl nodded, splitting off from the group. Once she was out of earshot, Marcus asked, “So, I’m guessing we’re going back to fight that thing, aren’t we?” “What, are you kidding?” Lauren grinned, twirling her splattershot. “There’s no guessing about it.” “We’ll have to get our weapons from home first.” Katherine pulled out her communicator. “Pearl, there’s a monster attacking near Port Mackerel; some undead guy with an axe. Me and agents 3 and 8 are going home to retrieve our weapons. In the meantime, you’re going to have to lead a squadron to hold it off.” “O-okay. I’ll bring Marina, Link, and Mario.” “Good call. We’ll see you there.” Katherine turned off her communicator, as she and Marcus split off from Lauren to head to their own homes.

Pearl turned off her communicator, pocketing the device and holding her head in her hands. “Geez, I can’t believe this is the sort of stuff I get calls about these days.” Turning around, she called, “Yo, Marina! We’re needed for a monster attack!” A few seconds later, a voice responded from the lab down the hallway, “You’ll have to speak up! Kinda busy here!” Pearl rolled her eyes, jumping off the couch where she’d been trying to write music, and made her way down the hall. “Marina, there’s a monster near Port Mackerel. You coming or what?” The octoling looked up from the machine she was working on, while Sheldon and professor E. Gadd continued to work on another in the middle of the room. “Sorry, but right now I’m still needed to help work on the KartMech. Until we figure out what’s causing these creatures to appear, we can’t afford to stop expanding our arsenal. Why don’t you take one of the dimensional foreigners? They all seem like good fighters.” “Alright, fine.” Pearl conceded. “Maybe I’ll take Pit; he definitely knows his way around a sword. His twin’s a bit aloof even by my standards. By the way, how much longer until you nerds are done with the mech?” “Fortunately, it should be done by the next week or two. Not to brag, but I do have some experience building advanced karts.” E. Gadd explained. “Uh, right. Kart building...definitely something to be proud of.” Pearl slowly walked out of the doorway, calling over to the guest bedrooms at the end of the hall, “Hey Pit, Link, Mario! You guys want to come help me fight a monster?” After a few seconds’ pause, she went to a perpendicular hallway with a break room at the end. “Oh. You guys are… what are you guys doing?” “We’re just playing poker. Wanna join?” Luigi offered, sitting around a set of cards and poker chips with Mario, Pit, Dark Pit, Link, and Cappy floating a few inches off the ground. “I’m losing poker...to a hat.” Dark Pit lamented, pushing a small stack of chips over to Cappy’s side of the circle. “Okay, well, there’s a monster attack happening a few blocks down. We need to go and stomp it out.” “Alright, let’s do this!” Pit immediately jumped up, dragging Dark Pit into a standing position. “Oh… Uh… I’m not… not really much of a fighter.” Luigi admitted, shuddering. “Relax, bro. If it’s just one monster, then the five of us should be able to take care of it just fine.” Mario assured his brother. “Okay. Sorry I couldn’t help, but unless I know I’m necessary for something...” “You become a complete and utter coward unable to do anything?” Dark Pit finished for him. “Yeah, that’s it!” “Alright, you can stay here for now, but if we need backup, we’re going to call you up.” Pearl briefed him. “Got it. In the meantime, I’ll ask Marina if there’s anything else I can do.” “Relax, it shouldn’t take us too long.” Link asserted, standing up while Cappy perched on Mario’s head. “I mean, we’ve got a tiny white squid girl, a winged teenager with a double sword-bow, his emo twin, a guy with a magic talking hat, and a shapeshifting master swordsman. How hard could it be?”

In the middle of downtown Inkopolis, an armored corpse swung its axe into cars and buildings, sending civilians running off the street. One driver attempted to run over the draugr, which threw its axe into the hood a dozen feet away. The weapon startled the driver until his vehicle crashed onto its side, barely managing to escape while the car’s engine burst into flames a few feet away. The draugr walked into the middle of the blaze, picking up its battle-axe while ignoring the fire surrounding it. As it walked out, the blaze floating off its rusted armor and mottled skin, an arrow glowing with pure light shot into its arm. “What is this magic?” “That’s a light arrow, made of pure good and divine blessing. It should be like poison to a demon like you!” Link explained, fastening his bow onto his back. “I am unfamiliar with this magic. No matter. I will slaughter you all, and conquer this realm in the name of Tyr!” The draugr charged at them with its axe raised in the air. Pit and Dark Pit glided over to it, swinging their swords diagonally to block the weapon. The draugr raised its axe diagonally, swinging it downwards to knock the two onto the concrete. “You two alright?” Cappy asked, floating around them. “Yeah. It’ll take more than that to stop the captain of Palutena’s guard!” Pit stood up, attaching his swords to ready his bow. He fired a series of spectral arrows that were effortlessly blocked while Dark Pit and Link rushed the draugr. Link held up his shield to deflect an axe strike, turning it upwards so Dark Pit could use it as a platform to jump behind the draugr and swing his swords at its armored back. The draugr rolled out of the way, swinging its axe. Link raised his shield while Dark Pit crossed his swords, preventing the axe from cutting them while the impact knocked them into a wall a foot away. Pearl jumped on the draugr’s back, plunging her daggers into its neck between the helmet and armor before jumping off. The draugr swung its axe downwards with both arms, creating a thin 6-foot trench in the concrete. Mario tossed Cappy to springboard over the crack in the ground, kicking downwards at the draugr before jumping out of the way of its axe swing. “This guy’s got the strength of an iron knuckle mixed with the speed of a wolfos.” Link muttered, wiping a bloodstain out of his hair. “Not a fun combination.” “I don’t know what either of those things are, but this guy’s going down!” Pit jumped, slashing diagonally in midair to strike the draugr with both swords while Dark Pit launched a purple arrow into its neck. The draugr swung its axe at Link, Mario pushing him down so the weapon embedded itself in the nearby wall. “Thanks man.” He acknowledged, pushing Mario off himself. “Maybe if I use the goron mask...” He placed a brown mask on his face, transmogrifying into a large brown creature with rock-like growths on its back. “Trickery will not avail you, Lokison!” The draugr launched its axe vertically, spinning through the air while Link rolled away to leave it lodged in the wall. Link continued to rotate in a circle around the warrior-corpse, a set of spikes appearing on his back with an orange aura. “Now! While he’s distracted!” Dark Pit gestured at the draugr as it wildly swung its axe, Mario throwing Cappy for Pit to springboard off of. He assembled his sword-bow in midair, firing a pair of projectiles into the draugr’s eyes before Link bowled into it, knocking the creature over to the end of the street. It stood up, brandishing its axe. “No… I am a warrior of the Aesir! I will conquer this realm in the name of Asgard and earn passage into the halls of Valhalla among the All-Father’s chosen!” “Anyone know what this guy’s talking about?” Pit asked, looking around the group. “Who cares? Let’s just take him down already!” Pearl yelled, as footsteps echoed around the corner. “Hey, guys. Hope we’re not late for the party.” Marcus started loading a blast from his splatling. “Actually, you’re just in time.” Link nocked a light arrow, while Pit and Dark Pit aimed their divine projectiles. The three of them, Lauren, and Marcus all fired their arrows and plasma, causing the draugr to fall over and dissolve. “Alright! Guess that guy had a real axe to grind!” Pit celebrated, raising his sword skyward. “Nice work, guys. Maybe next time I’ll actually contribute.” Katherine quietly chuckled to herself. “Maybe if I could actually shoot plasma...” Her musings were interrupted by dozens of flashes of light, each accompanied by the appearance of another draugr. A small army of undead soldiers raised their axes, swords, spears, and shields, charging at the nine-man group. “Come on, team! Let’s stop this invasion before it begins!” Katherine charged at the draugrs, one of them blocking her daggers with its shield before slamming the metal circle into her stomach. “Okay… maybe we should call for backup.” She groaned, doubling over while trying not to throw up. “Sydney!” She called into her communicator, tossing a splatbomb into the horde. “Call up the S4 and tell them we’ve got an enemy army at Port Mackerel!” Lauren jumped at one of the draugr, kicking it in the chest before backflipping over a swing of its sword. She dodged to the side as another draugr stabbed at her with its spear from behind, grabbing the weapon and pulling on it for leverage to dropkick the entity. She rolled between the two creatures, allowing them to inadvertently slice into each other as she called Tyler on her communicator while dodging the weapons. “Tyler, there’s a monster army near Port Mackerel. We need the blue team to teleport to Inkopolis for backup.” Lauren explained before a spear grazed her side, drawing yellow ink-blood. She winced in pain, grabbing the gash. Another draugr swung its axe as she dodged, turning the weapon to smack her in the face with its flat side hard enough to send her flying into a wall. “Hurry!” She called into the device, spitting out a glob of ink-blood. Nearby, she could see Mario toss Cappy onto a draugr’s head. He disappeared, the draugr’s eyes turning a bright blue while sprouting an oversized brown mustache. It began swinging its axe, striking down several of its own brethren. A group of nine entered the makeshift battleground as the blue team, S4, and Eric threw splatbombs and fired a variety of weapons, covering several draugr and their shields in blue and green ink. “Lucky you called us between games.” Tyler helped Lauren stand up, both firing plasma and ink from their splattershots. “Th-thanks.” She breathed out, grabbing her bloodied side. “Hey Link! Got any more of that red potion? I’m kind of bleeding out here.” “Yeah, just pour it on.” He tossed a small bottle of red liquid at her, explaining, “I’ve only got two more of those, so try not to get any more injuries.” “Yeah, thanks.” She rolled under a sword, turning around to shoot the monster in the back. The plasma burned through the armor, stunning the draugr long enough for Link to jump up and impale it through the face. He kicked off the chestplate to backflip through the air, firing a light arrow into a draugr’s eye while upside-down. “Let’s try out the zora mask.” He took out a blue mask, transforming into a tall humanoid with ichthian gills and fins on his elbows. He turned, pivoting on one leg to kick the draugr in the chest with the other. Turning around, he launched his elbow blades at another of the creatures. Pit and Dark Pit stood back to back, firing mystic arrows of light and dark. “Filth of the land, hear our words!” Pit declared, impaling a draugr through the stomach. “And see our actions!” Dark Pit continued, grabbing a spear between his blades. “I am Pit, servant of the goddess of light!” “And I am Dark Pit, servant to no other but myself!” He held out his swords, stabbing two draugr on either side. “And together we will rain death upon you!” They both jumped up, dive-kicking the same draugr. “Nice speech, guys. How long did it take you to practice?” Margaret asked, covering a draugr’s head with her slosher so it felled its own brethren. “Actually, we just came up with it on the fly while fighting the Chaos Kin’s forces.” Pit explained, slicing through one of the draugrs. Nate smacked another with his inkbrush before Eric slammed it from behind with his roller. A brightly-painted van turned the corner, running over half a dozen draugr while sustaining moderate damage from the weapons. “Guys! We heard about this on the news!” Callie rolled out of the door while Marie fired a burst of plasma from her charger. Luigi stumbled out the back, rolling and dodging through the draugrs to let them slice into each other. He turned on his poltergust G-00, blowing several spears back to where they’d been thrown. Callie ducked into the middle of a cluster of draugrs, spinning her roller in a full circle to knock down a dozen of the creatures. Marie held up her charger horizontally to block an axe strike, turning into a squid to slip behind and blast the draugr as it stumbled forward. Mario continued possessing one of the draugrs, dual-wielding a sword and axe to slice and stab at the remaining stragglers. Once he was finished, he reappeared in normal space. Lauren rapidly fired a series of blasts from her splattershot, knocking down the stunned draugr with dozens of burn marks. “Alright!” Cappy floated in the air, looking around at the dozens of draugr corpses disintegrating on the street. “Hey, nice shot there, kid.” “Shut up.” Lauren snarled, her finger still on the splattershot’s trigger. “Shut up, you parasite.” “What?” “You heard me. You… you’re a mind-controller! Like Tartar, or, or, the Insurgency! Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t blast you out of the air right now!” “Wait, Lauren, stop!” Mario stood in front of Cappy. “And you!” She screamed, trembling with rage. “You were the one actually in control, weren’t you?!” “Wait a second, Lauren. Maybe we should-” “Shut up!” She spat, interrupting Katherine. “I’ve been through that! Trapped in your own body, under the control of something else, forced to try to kill your own friends and all you can do is watch! Kat, you understand, right? That scientist-Dr. Bright-he possessed you after that swordsman killed him!” Lauren kept her firearm trained on Mario. “That’s not it at all. I possess animals and monsters. They don’t have minds of their own.” Mario insisted. “I-it doesn’t matter. That’s not the point.” She lowered her weapon. “You guys can trust these two if you want, but for right now, I’m going to avoid them.” She teleported away from the port. “She probably went home. I'll go check on her." Katherine suggested, activating her transporter.

“Hey, Lauren, you alright?” Kat asked, appearing in her friend’s living room. “Yeah.” She spoke quietly, looking up from her couch. Katherine walked over to the sofa, sitting next to Lauren. “I just...I mean, I know he uses that mind control for good, but I, I just can’t...” She lost her voice, gradually choking up before starting to cry. “Hey, hey, it, uh...” Kat hesitated before wrapping her arms around Lauren. “I-I’m so sorry. It’s been months; I should’ve gotten over this by now!” She yelled, punching Kat’s shoulder. “Hey, don’t...don’t say that.” She gently rocked Lauren back and forth, running a hand through her tentacle-hair. “You’ll, I dunno, get over it when you do, I guess.” “O-okay.” She stammered, resting her head on Katherine’s shoulder. “Sorry if I worried you.” “It’s fine. Hey, you’re not going to leave again, are you?” Lauren sat upright, putting her hands on Katherine’s back. “Are you kidding? If I learned one thing last year, it’s that I can’t run away from these things. I have to face them head-on.” “Yeah, well, I...” The octoling trailed off, biting her lip. “Yeah?” “I… I’ll be here if you need me. Yeah, that’s it.” Lauren smiled, pulling Katherine into a tight embrace. “Thanks.” They stayed on the couch together for a solid minute before Katherine pulled away. “You alright now?” Lauren closed her eyes contentedly. “Yeah, you can go now.” Kat nodded, walking out of the front door.


End file.
